+SgtMikal Posted November 30, 2010 Posted November 30, 2010 Great idea for a cointest! Actually, the Philadelphia Flyers are supporting MOvember as well, and they are my favorite hockey team. I already have a mustache (and haven't shaved it since February 1992), so I couldn't add one for this cause. At any rate...here is a phrase that I have been known to mutter from time to time: "I'm so poor I can't even afford to pay attention!" Quote
+Ian1959 Posted November 30, 2010 Posted November 30, 2010 I've often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife to go swimming. My Dad used to say 'always fight fire with fire', which is probably why he got thrown out of the fire department. When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realised that The Lord doesn't work that way, so I stole one and asked him to forgive me. Quote
+EyeD10T Posted November 30, 2010 Posted November 30, 2010 "There are 3 kinds of people in this world....those that can count, and those that cant!" Thanks for the cointest - this is a fun one. Quote
+GATOULIS Posted November 30, 2010 Posted November 30, 2010 She is so stupid that she is studing all night to give a blood exams the next day!!! Quote
+Carbon Hunter Posted December 1, 2010 Posted December 1, 2010 A cache in hand is worth two that you may not find. Quote
+The Skylark Four Posted December 1, 2010 Posted December 1, 2010 God made relatives; Thank God we can choose our friends. Quote
+The Skylark Four Posted December 1, 2010 Posted December 1, 2010 How come "abbreviated" is such a long word? Quote
+The Skylark Four Posted December 1, 2010 Posted December 1, 2010 The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on. Quote
+SgtMikal Posted December 1, 2010 Posted December 1, 2010 I think this is still going, so...here are a couple of chucklers. Why is it called a building if it's already been built? Why is it a pair of panties, but only one bra? Quote
+GATOULIS Posted December 1, 2010 Posted December 1, 2010 (edited) Here is a greek one.... Stop doing stupid things... I have to protect you otherwise you will fell naked, in the hole with the cucumberies!!! We say something else now instead of cucumberies, but... Edited December 1, 2010 by GATOULIS Quote
+GATOULIS Posted December 1, 2010 Posted December 1, 2010 (edited) I was so unlucky with both of my marriage... my first woman left me, and my second didn't!! Edited December 1, 2010 by GATOULIS Quote
+Semper Questio Posted December 1, 2010 Posted December 1, 2010 Dumber than a box of rocks. Slicker than snot on a glass doorknob. Hotter than a fireman's belt buckle at a 40-alarm fire. Watch out for that light at the end of the tunnel. It may be an oncoming train. Quote
+GATOULIS Posted December 1, 2010 Posted December 1, 2010 when this cointest ends? I have more than 9 phrases to post... Well... I will post my third for today ans I will go to sleep! "Politicians are like diapers.... you have to change them very often otherwise they fill with..... poop...." Quote
+GATOULIS Posted December 2, 2010 Posted December 2, 2010 if elections could change things... they would had been illegal! Quote
+GATOULIS Posted December 2, 2010 Posted December 2, 2010 if you are trying to fail...and you manage to do it.... doesn't this mean you succeeded?? Quote
+GATOULIS Posted December 2, 2010 Posted December 2, 2010 our world is collapsing because of unconcern... but who cares... Quote
+GATOULIS Posted December 3, 2010 Posted December 3, 2010 I will change this one to be more... Australian... of course you can put any city name... "Do not polute Perth! Send your garbadge to Sydney!" Quote
+GATOULIS Posted December 3, 2010 Posted December 3, 2010 I am not afraid of Death.... I just do not want to be there when this will happen to me! Quote
+GATOULIS Posted December 3, 2010 Posted December 3, 2010 Doctor gave me 6 months of life.... but when (after some time...) he saw that I couldn't pay him... he gave me an other 6 months... Quote
+The Skylark Four Posted December 3, 2010 Posted December 3, 2010 Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong Quote
+The Skylark Four Posted December 3, 2010 Posted December 3, 2010 (edited) I totally take back all those times I didn’t want to nap when I was younger. Edited December 3, 2010 by The Skylark Four Quote
+The Skylark Four Posted December 3, 2010 Posted December 3, 2010 (edited) When you have nothing to say, say nothing. Edited December 3, 2010 by The Skylark Four Quote
+AlliedOz Posted December 3, 2010 Author Posted December 3, 2010 Great stuff guys, several of them had me out loud. Keep them coming, I'll wrap up the cointest in the next day or so. Movember is officially over now so I have shaved off the Mo that bugged me for the last 4 weeks. My wife is kissing me again making up for lost time... so good news there. The funds raised this year was the most so far, so thanks to all who donated around the world. Cheers Quote
+redwingrr Posted December 3, 2010 Posted December 3, 2010 (edited) this one is used in response to "It's knee high." ... You mean my hiney or my low knee? Edited December 3, 2010 by redwingrr Quote
+Ian1959 Posted December 3, 2010 Posted December 3, 2010 Always remember you are unique.... just like everyone else. Quote
+GATOULIS Posted December 3, 2010 Posted December 3, 2010 (edited) Always remember you are unique.... just like everyone else. that reminded me a similar funny phrase... saying.... there is a woman that loves you and strongly believes that you are the most beautiful man in the world... but the problem is that this women is your mother! Hmm.. I still have 3 or 4 to go.... but as I saw the cointest is ending tomorrow... what shall I do? shall I post them later or... whn the day changes here in Greece?? right now it is 18:47! Of course mostly is for the fun! ...and I hope alliedOz my friend, that you laughed with my email that had the special phrases... Edited December 3, 2010 by GATOULIS Quote
+redwingrr Posted December 3, 2010 Posted December 3, 2010 It's better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick. Quote
+AlliedOz Posted December 3, 2010 Author Posted December 3, 2010 (edited) Hmm.. I still have 3 or 4 to go.... but as I saw the cointest is ending tomorrow... what shall I do? shall I post them later or... whn the day changes here in Greece?? right now it is 18:47! Of course mostly is for the fun! ...and I hope alliedOz my friend, that you laughed with my email that had the special phrases... you'll have time GATOULIS it is not ending just yet. And yes mate I had a good chuckle, most would have been OK for this forum, but some they would have raised a few eyebrows. Edited December 3, 2010 by AlliedOz Quote
+labrat_wr Posted December 3, 2010 Posted December 3, 2010 Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes. Quote
+labrat_wr Posted December 3, 2010 Posted December 3, 2010 Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. Quote
paganfrog Posted December 3, 2010 Posted December 3, 2010 my german uncle like to use offal for traditional english or german dishes. one time he very nearly got linched while going around london butchers asking the butcher if he had any brains, then asking for faggots and finally asking if he had any testicles. he didnt understand why he got the response that he did Quote
+labrat_wr Posted December 3, 2010 Posted December 3, 2010 There's too much blood in my caffeine system. Quote
+GATOULIS Posted December 4, 2010 Posted December 4, 2010 huh.... what a strange world... when you talk to God it is a prayer.... but when God talks to you it is schizophrenia!!! Quote
+GATOULIS Posted December 4, 2010 Posted December 4, 2010 'I lost all my money but I sleped like a baby....' 'Realy??' 'YES!! Every 2 hours I was awakening and started crying....' Quote
+GATOULIS Posted December 4, 2010 Posted December 4, 2010 Oh boy... you are an ugly woman!! 'Sir!! you are drunk!' 'yes but tomorrow I will be sober but you will still be ugly!' Quote
+mamoreb Posted December 4, 2010 Posted December 4, 2010 Don't underestimate the stupidity of people in large groups. Quote
+GATOULIS Posted December 5, 2010 Posted December 5, 2010 world is ending tomorrow..... join us in out protesting march that will be held next Sunday! ???? Quote
+GATOULIS Posted December 5, 2010 Posted December 5, 2010 I know everything about SAX **(I hope you got it... ) Quote
+mamoreb Posted December 5, 2010 Posted December 5, 2010 Meetings - the socially acceptable means of doing nothing. Quote
+GATOULIS Posted December 5, 2010 Posted December 5, 2010 (edited) He is so terrible.... just like a fart in a space uniform! *** Space uniform... I mean... astronaut suit... Edited December 5, 2010 by GATOULIS Quote
fl4t_four Posted December 5, 2010 Posted December 5, 2010 Might be NWS or child safe, but hey some of these have come from the mouths of mechanics! It's Rainin' like a two cocked cow pissin' on a flat rock. That thing is shining like a diamond in a goats a** (what does that even mean?) I've been busier than a one legged man in a kick boxing match. 60% of the time, it works every time Save water drink beer Save a tree eat a beaver Quote
+GATOULIS Posted December 6, 2010 Posted December 6, 2010 I remmebered something but it is a greek funny phrase... so it is difficult to translate it..... it is: Αν θες να δεις και εσύ μια άσπρη μέρα, ρίξε και εσύ ένα γιαούρτι... μπορείς! it means.... if you want to see a good day (exact translation.... white day!), you can throw a yoghurt.... yes... you can! Yoghurt is white... so... Quote
+AlliedOz Posted December 6, 2010 Author Posted December 6, 2010 Well I got a few laughs out of all your posts, so a huge thanks. Not so many things that are said in groups that need a little backstory but all in all a great little collection. So now to the winner... and the random number generator picks #14 well done GaryM53 I'm not 100% sure I get your post tho unless it is a brand name, that is to say I get the name just not the connection So pick a coin and let us all know in this thread, then send me a PM with your address and I'll get it in the post right away Trying to get something done working with "Seemore Doless" is hard. Quote
+GATOULIS Posted December 6, 2010 Posted December 6, 2010 (edited) congrats Gary!!! Thank you Alied0z for the great cointest! It was fun! Edited December 6, 2010 by GATOULIS Quote
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