Advice for Newbie

[+BadlandsSasha]

My geocaching partner and I ran into a very unusual situation today. Just after finishing w/ a cache we found we were approached by a neighbor of the owner of the cache who explained to us that the owner had passed away 2 days ago. She made us feel unwelcome in the neighborhood and that we were somehow being offensive by being there while there was a gathering for a funeral. The neighbor requested that we take the cache and post that it was retired.

 

We thought we were doing the right thing by obliging and we posted as requested. Later we were contacted by the owners niece who is very upset that we took the cache, and that she wanted it returned immediately. Our travels had taken us on, so it is impossible to return it to the location. We have responded to her and offered to mail it wherever she would like - ASAP.

 

What is the proper protocol in a situation like this? How could we have done better? We are certainly well meaning people and want to know the right thing to do if a similar situation were to occur.

 

Thanks for the advice!

 

~Starry Messenger

[+FlagMan]

My geocaching partner and I ran into a very unusual situation today. Just after finishing w/ a cache we found we were approached by a neighbor of the owner of the cache who explained to us that the owner had passed away 2 days ago. She made us feel unwelcome in the neighborhood and that we were somehow being offensive by being there while there was a gathering for a funeral. The neighbor requested that we take the cache and post that it was retired.

 

We thought we were doing the right thing by obliging and we posted as requested. Later we were contacted by the owners niece who is very upset that we took the cache, and that she wanted it returned immediately. Our travels had taken us on, so it is impossible to return it to the location. We have responded to her and offered to mail it wherever she would like - ASAP.

 

What is the proper protocol in a situation like this? How could we have done better? We are certainly well meaning people and want to know the right thing to do if a similar situation were to occur.

 

Thanks for the advice!

 

~Starry Messenger

 

You done good, in my mind. Can't think of anything I would have done differently all around under the circumstances...

[2oldfarts (the rockhounders)]

We are a husband & wife team. If I should die and someone would be told to take 1 of our caches by someone other than Shirley, she would be upset if they followed through and did take the cache. I think the best thing to do would be to post a note on the cache page and maybe send the reviewer an e-mail describing the situation.

 

John

[+t4e]

We are a husband & wife team. If I should die and someone would be told to take 1 of our caches by someone other than Shirley, she would be upset if they followed through and did take the cache. I think the best thing to do would be to post a note on the cache page and maybe send the reviewer an e-mail describing the situation.

 

John

 

and how would anyone that hasn't personally met you two know that the person asking for the cache to be removed is NOT a family member?

[2oldfarts (the rockhounders)]

We are a husband & wife team. If I should die and someone would be told to take 1 of our caches by someone other than Shirley, she would be upset if they followed through and did take the cache. I think the best thing to do would be to post a note on the cache page and maybe send the reviewer an e-mail describing the situation.

 

John

 

and how would anyone that hasn't personally met you two know that the person asking for the cache to be removed is NOT a family member?

 

How would anyone know they were a family member? If they were a family member, then they could remove the cache themselves.

It is not up to a finder to remove a cache, unless it has been posted on the cache "Would the next finder please remove this cache.".

 

John

[+t4e]

We are a husband & wife team. If I should die and someone would be told to take 1 of our caches by someone other than Shirley, she would be upset if they followed through and did take the cache. I think the best thing to do would be to post a note on the cache page and maybe send the reviewer an e-mail describing the situation.

 

John

 

and how would anyone that hasn't personally met you two know that the person asking for the cache to be removed is NOT a family member?

 

How would anyone know they were a family member? If they were a family member, then they could remove the cache themselves.

It is not up to a finder to remove a cache, unless it has been posted on the cache "Would the next finder please remove this cache.".

 

John

 

its not that simple, if i was in that situation i would take it too

 

many family members are not familiar with geocaching and the "right" thing to do

maybe they don't want anything that would remind them of the "gone" relative

 

but its hard to tell really what one would do unless you are faced with that situation, so since i have never been faced with anything like that i would not pass any judgment on the OP

they did what they thought was best given the circumstances

it would never cross my mind that if someone wants a cache removed from near their property would go as far as saying the CO passed away, that is very creepy

Edited April 25, 2011 by t4e

[+LabguyMN]

You had no choice. Granting the request of a grieving relative, or neighbor is the least you could have done. They didn't want more of us tromping around while they were mourning the loss of a loved one. No problem. Nobody in their right mind would suggest that you should have said "Nope, won't do it- you do it." Come on! I doubt the departed CO passed along his/her geocaching.com password- probably nobody could add anything (except a log) to the cachepage without that. If I were faced with exactly this I have to believe I'd have expressed my sorrow for their loss, taken the cache and been done with it. If you weren't from that area pehaps you could have left the cache at your next cache location-hidden, of course) with a note on both pages as to what you'd done- and contacted that states' reviewer. That way if it was a farse then the cache is still accessible. But I doubt seriously I would have thought of that at the time. Nice work.

[+LabguyMN]

.

Edited April 25, 2011 by LabguyMN

[+ShowStop]

Damned if you do, damned if you don't. I think you did the right thing and tried to be helpful.

[2oldfarts (the rockhounders)]

We are a husband & wife team. If I should die and someone would be told to take 1 of our caches by someone other than Shirley, she would be upset if they followed through and did take the cache. I think the best thing to do would be to post a note on the cache page and maybe send the reviewer an e-mail describing the situation.

 

John

 

and how would anyone that hasn't personally met you two know that the person asking for the cache to be removed is NOT a family member?

 

How would anyone know they were a family member? If they were a family member, then they could remove the cache themselves.

It is not up to a finder to remove a cache, unless it has been posted on the cache "Would the next finder please remove this cache.".

 

John

 

its not that simple, if i was in that situation i would take it too

 

many family members are not familiar with geocaching and the "right" thing to do

maybe they don't want anything that would remind them of the "gone" relative

 

but its hard to tell really what one would do unless you are faced with that situation, so since i have never been faced with anything like that i would not pass any judgment on the OP

they did what they thought was best given the circumstances

it would never cross my mind that if someone wants a cache removed from near their property would go as far as saying the CO passed away, that is very creepy

 

Yes, it is just that simple.

 

You do Not take someone personal property without their expressed permission. Just because some stranger tells you the cache owner has died is not justification to remove a cache. That neighbor may have been having a disagreement with the cache owner over where the cache had been placed and took advantage of the "situation" claiming that the owner was deceased. Without verification of all the parties involved the best choice is to leave the cache in place and contact the reviewer. It is simple enough to tell the person making the request, that you will contact GC.com and have it taken care of.

 

If the they were actually having a wake for the cache owner, then finding and logging the deceased's cache would be an appropriate showing of respect to that person.

 

Wouldn't you like to have your friends do a cache run for all your caches as a way of having a wake to show their respect to you?

 

John

[+Bear and Ragged]

That neighbor may have been having a disagreement with the cache owner over where the cache had been placed and took advantage of the "situation" claiming that the owner was deceased. Without verification of all the parties involved the best choice is to leave the cache in place and contact the reviewer. It is simple enough to tell the person making the request, that you will contact GC.com and have it taken care of.

 

In the same situation, I'd have taken the cache.

 

If the person didn't know where the cache was exactly, or what it looked like, having seen where you replaced it they could then remove it themselves... and throw it in the bin.

[+t4e]

 

Yes, it is just that simple.

 

You do Not take someone personal property without their expressed permission. Just because some stranger tells you the cache owner has died is not justification to remove a cache.

 

its a cache not their car, besides i have no abilities that i know of to speak to the dead

 

 

If the they were actually having a wake for the cache owner, then finding and logging the deceased's cache would be an appropriate showing of respect to that person.

 

that's your position, not everyone reacts the same when grieving

 

 

Wouldn't you like to have your friends do a cache run for all your caches as a way of having a wake to show their respect to you?

 

John

 

yes i would, but that is not to say that every cacher would

 

 

than again, when i'm dead i wouldn't know squat if my wishes are granted, all that is nice to think of when you're alive

[2oldfarts (the rockhounders)]

Yes, it is just that simple.

 

You do Not take someone personal property without their expressed permission. Just because some stranger tells you the cache owner has died is not justification to remove a cache.

 

its a cache not their car, besides i have no abilities that i know of to speak to the dead

 

Would like someone to take one of your caches just because someone else said to take it? They could tell the cacher you have died and they need to remove that cache. Doesn't matter whether or not you're dead, they tell the cacher to take it and so that cacher does. It's not like they're telling them to take your car because you no longer need it.

 

John

[+rav_bunneh]

Death is a hard subject as each and every person regards it differently. Some want to lock away a memory of a person while others see every item the person had as a memorial. I would have told the person that I would post online as they requested. However, I'd also leave the cache and tell them that it belongs to the late persons immediate family. If they complained about that I'd remind them that I'm a total stranger and that doesn't it make more sense that they ask an immediate family member more.

 

:3

[+Triple Crown]

The OP did exactly the right thing, and offering to return the cache to the niece by mail is very gracious. Worst case, the cache is out of service for a week or two...you posted a note explaining what happened, no harm, no foul.

 

I've been asked to remove caches by police, neighbors and employees and have always complied. Better to remove it and return it to the owner than to get into an unnecessary confrontation. You did the right thing for the right reasons. Carry on!

[+Logscaler and Red]

I have done the same thing before.

 

At the request of property owners and LEO I have picked up and walked off with caches, posted the info on the cache page and sent a e-mail to the owner.

 

I have also relocated caches as close to the original location as possible and sent the owner an e-mail where it was when I was from out of town.

 

Just moving the cache is what I would recommend when you are out of town and get approached with this type of situation.

 

That way, IF it is a bogus request, the cache owner has easy access to their cache and if not bogus, then someone else can grab it and move/replace it.

[+Don_J]

I have done the same thing before.

 

At the request of property owners and LEO I have picked up and walked off with caches, posted the info on the cache page and sent a e-mail to the owner.

 

I have also relocated caches as close to the original location as possible and sent the owner an e-mail where it was when I was from out of town.

 

Just moving the cache is what I would recommend when you are out of town and get approached with this type of situation.

 

That way, IF it is a bogus request, the cache owner has easy access to their cache and if not bogus, then someone else can grab it and move/replace it.

 

If I were approached as such, I would almost certainly take the cache, If I don't, they will. I would also explain to them that it is not simple to "retire" a cache. Even if I can quickly get it archived, (which in this case was not the desire of the relatives), there will still be cachers that have it in their GPSrs and will continue to look for it.

 

I would simply write back and explain that you were simply safeguarding the cache because the neighbor was demanding that it be removed.

 

BTW, To the Original Poster, (OP), I'm sorry that you were only three days into your caching career when this happened. It is one of the most bizarre situations I have ever seen posted. I went for almost three years before being encountered by someone. I really hope that this experience, or the almost expected debate on this forum doesn't discourage you from further participation in finding and maybe even hiding caches. You may find the Getting Started forum a bit more friendly as you get your feet wet.

Edited April 28, 2011 by Don_J

[+Disintagrator]

My geocaching partner and I ran into a very unusual situation today. Just after finishing w/ a cache we found we were approached by a neighbor of the owner of the cache who explained to us that the owner had passed away 2 days ago. She made us feel unwelcome in the neighborhood and that we were somehow being offensive by being there while there was a gathering for a funeral. The neighbor requested that we take the cache and post that it was retired.

 

We thought we were doing the right thing by obliging and we posted as requested. Later we were contacted by the owners niece who is very upset that we took the cache, and that she wanted it returned immediately. Our travels had taken us on, so it is impossible to return it to the location. We have responded to her and offered to mail it wherever she would like - ASAP.

 

What is the proper protocol in a situation like this? How could we have done better? We are certainly well meaning people and want to know the right thing to do if a similar situation were to occur.

 

Thanks for the advice!

 

~Starry Messenger

 

People don't like what they do not understand,It,s just My opinion But the neighbor probably didn't like the cache being there to begin with and took this opportunity to get the cache removed. I was looking for a cache one day at a home, that a neighbor called the cops on me, right after the cop showed up and began to question me about what was going on,and I showed him the cache listing saying it was ok to snoop around in the guys yard, the owner of the cache came home and told us that the neighbor had been complaining for years and even threatened to take him to court because the did not want "those types of people in the neighborhood". I think you did right by obliging the request, only if to keep other cachers from having the same expierience. as for me when I die I,my Headstone is going to open up with a cache inside.......I just hope my neighbors don't complain.

[BlueRajah]

My Headstone is going to open up with a cache inside.......I just hope my neighbors don't complain.

 

You better not die, or be on the far side of the cemetary at least .1 miles away.. or live longer than me so you don't block mine.

[+Disintagrator]

My Headstone is going to open up with a cache inside.......I just hope my neighbors don't complain.

 

You better not die, or be on the far side of the cemetary at least .1 miles away.. or live longer than me so you don't block mine.

 

 

Well hopefully the Reviewer will see to it that both our needs are met, I'm hoping we can get some special circumstances if it is a problem, or we will have to come back and haunt him!