Obama Team Announces New Benchmark Initiative

[+pgrig]

STRATEGY TO COUNTERACT SLUMPING ECONOMY

 

CHICAGO (AP)--The transition team for President-elect Barack Obama yesterday revealed a bold new strategy to aid in rebuilding the nation's infrastructure while boosting the incomes of underemployed workers engaged in recovering and upgrading long-neglected geodetic benchmarks.

 

Lawrence K. Summers, Obama's newly appointed Senior Economic Advisor, laid out the details of the new initiative, which he called "one of the crown jewels of our recovery program."

 

"Our analysis places the value of each recovery of one of these little benchmarks at approximately $1,126," Summers said, "when you include time spent in the field, travel and per diem, and the fully loaded costs of administration (including web-based reporting)."

 

"Since the highly skilled private citizens who go around finding and digging up these beauties are known to be a free-spending lot, we believe that instituting a 'benchmark bounty' program will be very effective in stimulating benchmark recovery and pump-priming an economic recovery."

 

Summers indicated that commencing on January 10, 2009, a $1,000 bounty would be paid for each fully-documented recovery of an NGS benchmark, thus stimulating the spending behavior of benchmark hunters and freeing up resources at related state and federal agencies, such as the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA).

 

Summers was joined at the press conference by former Sen. Al Gore who said the new benchmark recovery initiative would be part of "priming the pump of the rapidly accelerating green machine of environmental improvement" being planned by the incoming Obama administration.

 

Gore pointed out that the planned construction of a national network of wind turbines, plus the electric transmission system to serve them, would require "figuring out where everything's at" once again, placing a premium on knowing the status of the "nation's benchmark ballpark."

 

"Before you can move forward," Gore said, "you've got to figure out where you're at, and benchmarks help us do this."

 

Members of the long-established website serving the benchmarking community, contacted through their online community, Geocaching.com, were generally enthusiastic. "It's about time," said one one member.

 

"We stomp all over creation, digging and scraping for these copper bolts, steel rods, and little holes drilled in rock, and what do we get from it? The so-called thrill of the hunt? Phooey! Give us some cabbage as compensation, and watch us fuel the fires of consumption in America!"

 

Transition Team technicians, citing the need to re-visit about 200,000 benchmarks nation-wide, announced they have set aside $200 million for the new program, to be entitled "Benchmark Bonanza."

 

Members of the Geocaching group immediately questioned whether past benchmark recoveries would qualify for reimbursements. That matter, said transition staffers, has been referred to a committee.

[+Marcie/Eric]

This is a joke, no?

 

I have hundreds of unfound unrecorded (according to the USCGS) BMs in my GPS.

 

STRATEGY TO COUNTERACT SLUMPING ECONOMY

 

CHICAGO (AP)--The transition team for President-elect Barack Obama yesterday revealed a bold new strategy to aid in rebuilding the nation's infrastructure while boosting the incomes of underemployed workers engaged in recovering and upgrading long-neglected geodetic benchmarks.

 

Lawrence K. Summers, Obama's newly appointed Senior Economic Advisor, laid out the details of the new initiative, which he called "one of the crown jewels of our recovery program."

 

"Our analysis places the value of each recovery of one of these little benchmarks at approximately $1,126," Summers said, "when you include time spent in the field, travel and per diem, and the fully loaded costs of administration (including web-based reporting)."

 

"Since the highly skilled private citizens who go around finding and digging up these beauties are known to be a free-spending lot, we believe that instituting a 'benchmark bounty' program will be very effective in stimulating benchmark recovery and pump-priming an economic recovery."

 

Summers indicated that commencing on January 10, 2009, a $1,000 bounty would be paid for each fully-documented recovery of an NGS benchmark, thus stimulating the spending behavior of benchmark hunters and freeing up resources at related state and federal agencies, such as the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA).

 

Summers was joined at the press conference by former Sen. Al Gore who said the new benchmark recovery initiative would be part of "priming the pump of the rapidly accelerating green machine of environmental improvement" being planned by the incoming Obama administration.

 

Gore pointed out that the planned construction of a national network of wind turbines, plus the electric transmission system to serve them, would require "figuring out where everything's at" once again, placing a premium on knowing the status of the "nation's benchmark ballpark."

 

"Before you can move forward," Gore said, "you've got to figure out where you're at, and benchmarks help us do this."

 

Members of the long-established website serving the benchmarking community, contacted through their online community, Geocaching.com, were generally enthusiastic. "It's about time," said one one member.

 

"We stomp all over creation, digging and scraping for these copper bolts, steel rods, and little holes drilled in rock, and what do we get from it? The so-called thrill of the hunt? Phooey! Give us some cabbage as compensation, and watch us fuel the fires of consumption in America!"

 

Transition Team technicians, citing the need to re-visit about 200,000 benchmarks nation-wide, announced they have set aside $200 million for the new program, to be entitled "Benchmark Bonanza."

 

Members of the Geocaching group immediately questioned whether past benchmark recoveries would qualify for reimbursements. That matter, said transition staffers, has been referred to a committee.

[Difficult Run]

STRATEGY TO COUNTERACT SLUMPING ECONOMY

 

If this is a joke, I find it in poor taste.

[+Cardinal Red]

STRATEGY TO COUNTERACT SLUMPING ECONOMY

If this is a joke, I find it in poor taste.

 

Of course it's a joke. Humor about serious subjects is still valid, and not at all in poor taste. I would find it difficult to interact with life without a good sense of humor. How is that working for you?

[+Mega Scooter]

"Summers indicated that commencing on January 10, 2009, a $1,000 bounty would be paid for each fully-documented recovery of an NGS benchmark, thus stimulating the spending behavior of benchmark hunters and freeing up resources at related state and federal agencies, such as the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA)."

 

 

Obama becomes POTUS on January 20, 2009.

[+pgrig]

Good catch, Mega Scooter! I guess it was just wishful thinking on my part. But you know, even the AP makes mistakes now and then...

 

And yes, in case there's a doubt, this story is fictional (sigh...). I do believe, however, that if the government sought to do what we do, its cost-per-well-documented-recovery would be about a grand....

Edited November 24, 2008 by pgrig

[+LSUFan]

 

"Before you can move forward," Gore said, "you've got to figure out where you're at, and benchmarks help us do this."

 

 

I knew it was all a joke when it stated that Al Gore called the benchmarks by that name. Politicians NEVER refer to something as it should be. It might have been more believable if he called the benchmarks things like "Economic Stimulus Diskettes" or "Federal Subsidized Geodetic Control Points".

 

I was afraid there for a minute, that you were going to tell me that Obama was going to turn gps selective availability back on.

Edited November 24, 2008 by LSUFan

[+BlueDeuce]

STRATEGY TO COUNTERACT SLUMPING ECONOMY

If this is a joke, I find it in poor taste.

 

Of course it's a joke. Humor about serious subjects is still valid, and not at all in poor taste. I would find it difficult to interact with life without a good sense of humor. How is that working for you?

 

Maybe we could burn some music albums. That always seems to make a difference.

[+Black Dog Trackers]

I musta missed the poor taste part of the humorous note. What part was it?

[Wintertime]

I was afraid there for a minute, that you were going to tell me that Obama was going to turn gps selective availability back on.

Luckily, we don't have to worry about that ever again, since the newer birds don't even have SA. Although I haven't been paying close attention and don't know whether any of the next-generation birds have been launched yet. Anyone here know?

 

Patty

[+Astro_D]

Well, fictional or not...... I'm sick of seeing crappy politics and politicians in a supposedly fun forum.

[+Black Dog Trackers]

I didn't see any politics or political leaning either way or any political message in there at all. It was just a joke as far as I could tell. While I was reading it, I thought, is this April 1 already???

[ArtMan]

Oh, I wish I had seen this a few hours ago. I just got back from a symposium at the Swedish embassy in Washington featuring three of this year's Nobel laureates. Had I known about this plan, I could have asked economics laureate Paul Krugman about it.

 

Krugman (of Princeton and the N.Y. Times) did say that "there are really strong parallels between what's happening now and what happened in the early years of the [great] depression. Particularly if you step back from surface appearances...."

 

That last phrase is a clear reference, I strongly believe, to surface (as opposed to sub-surface) benchmarks, so possibly he is already working on the value of a Benchmark Recovery Recovery Plan.

 

-ArtMan-

 

(edited to correct typo, adding missing word)

Edited November 24, 2008 by ArtMan

[+TheBeanTeam]

This is a joke, no?

 

 

A JOKE. I read this post this morning and quit my job to do a thirty benchmark run and when I get back it is possibly a joke.

 

How am I gonna explain this to my wife.

 

edit to fix spelling error.

Edited November 25, 2008 by TheBeanTeam

[+NorthWes]

Krugman (of Princeton and the N.Y. Times) did say that "there are really strong parallels between what's happening now and what happened in the early years of the [great] depression. Particularly if you step back from surface appearances...."

 

That last phrase is a clear reference, I strongly believe, to surface (as opposed to sub-surface) benchmarks, so possibly he already working on the value of a Benchmark Recovery Recovery Plan.

 

-ArtMan-

 

I almost hurt myself laughing at this post - good one, ArtMan! (OK - so I hold a wierd college degree - dual major in business & economics - it's a Bachelor of Science in Business Science - absolutely true! - so this really made my day!)

 

The Depression-era benchmark series set (in part) along the nation's early highway network (such as the old federal highway between Las Vegas NV and St George UT, where there's more than a mark a mile in some sections) are a testament to the useful hard work made available to unemployed folks through economic recovery programs of the mid-thirties. CCC (Civilian Conservation Corps) work projects are another lasting testimony to the craftsmanship and plain hard work folks were willing to undertake for a paycheck, which are still returning value today far in excess of the dollars spent on those projects so long ago. I appreciate the tongue in cheek humor, and the subtle reference to the contribution (however small some may see it as) made by volunteers out verifying the location of existing stations. I was only offended because I wasn't told when I'd be getting my check...

[+GEO*Trailblazer 1]

Does that include new Stations?

 

It is something that folks in high places really ought to consider.

Heck they could set a Benchmark of their own.

[Laffin]

I finally found a way to make more money driving down the highway; do you know how many "structural benchmarks" are right off the highway, water towers, airport beacons, ect. The only problem Gore might have is the environmental impact of many more cars driving like crazy all over the place locating these valuable stations. I can't wait.

 

p.s. tap tap on all benchmarks visible from I-84 in Multnomah County (I really need the money).

[Team Fawlty]

I finally found a way to make more money driving down the highway; do you know how many "structural benchmarks" are right off the highway, water towers, airport beacons, ect. The only problem Gore might have is the environmental impact of many more cars driving like crazy all over the place locating these valuable stations. I can't wait.

 

p.s. tap tap on all benchmarks visible from I-84 in Multnomah County (I really need the money).

 

Speaking of those "structural benchmarks" maybe Homeland Security should get in on it too...we could check up on the water tanks, bridges, airports etc....for terrorist activity...as long as we're already out there.

 

Jo Ann

[+TheBeanTeam]

 

p.s. tap tap on all benchmarks visible from I-84 in Multnomah County (I really need the money).

 

To late I already claimed all of those and if you come near them I will poke you with my ground probe.

[AZcachemeister]

Will we be paid retroactively for the recoveries we have already made?

[Laffin]

 

Speaking of those "structural benchmarks" maybe Homeland Security should get in on it too...we could check up on the water tanks, bridges, airports etc....for terrorist activity...as long as we're already out there.

 

Jo Ann

 

Yeah, we should get paid for those too.

[Laffin]

 

To late I already claimed all of those and if you come near them I will poke you with my ground probe.

not the probe again.

[+pgrig]

AZcachemeister-- From what I understand, Obama's people will handle previous recoveries under what they call the TARP (Terribly Ancient Recoveries Program). In this case, the Administration won't be your main problem. Instead, the sticking point may be the House Committee on Science and Technology, which is slated to handle the new program, since Madam Speaker Pelosi has demanded that anyone seeking to use the benchmark TARP develop a comprehensive plan for a "benchmark bailout" on these old recoveries. It is rumored that doing a plan like this may require a large staff and a good deal of money, making the attempt to get paid for your old ones not cost-effective. And another word to the wise: don't fly your private jet (Benchmark I) to the hearings--that didn't go so well for Chrysler.

 

By the way, did anyone realize that the original program described above would make a lot of sense? For a precedent, I note that a goodly number of the marks I find around here (Boston) were set during the last depression (1934-1938) and were likely part of a Federally-sponsored program (WPA, CCC, etc) to "prime the pump" during that period. Why not us too? I for one would appreciate a bailout, and I work much more cheaply and effectively than the CEO of Citigroup, whom we're paying more than the entire program contemplated in this thread would cost, just to make things worse....