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Do The Regular Posters Intimidate?


El Diablo

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Most of my posts have been to ask questions or to clarify a misundertood guideline.

 

The responses I have had have always been civil and helpful.

 

I do not feel at all intimidated, even when I ask a really dumb question and get a sarcastic comment back. I enjoy all forms of humour, have a weird sense of humour myself, and more often than not, 'harsh' and so-called 'intimidating' replies simply make me laugh!

 

On the other hand, when a post is pedantically going on and on and on about some puerile, self-opinionated, "see it my way or else" post, I find it impossible not to comment in an intimidating or sarcastic manner.

 

Does that make me a bad person? :huh:

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I chuckle everytime someone slaps a new user with a Markwell (or is it a Mopar now??) for asking an honest yet frequent question. Thats definitely one way to make sure they'll never ask again :huh: . Then again some users that aren't on message boards all the time take it a little too personally. Its a mixed bag.

OK, Quit chuckling at me!! :huh: CHUCKLEHEAD :D:huh:

:huh::huh:

 

I just got slapped with one a few days ago.

 

But you know what, I did get my answer. :huh:

 

I think the ones that are getting intimidated are people that aren't familiar with how message boards work.

 

They are like any type of gathering of people with different viewpoints, religions, politics, race, ... (the list can go on and on).

 

Even though you have a common interest, there are still going to be those differences that are going to rise up from time to time.

 

After a person has been a part of a community, like a lot of you regular guys for a long period of time, you know what buttons you can push on each other that will get a rise out of the other one.

Even though you know it is only in good fun, to an outsider it may seem like you are the worst of enemies.

But, in all actuality, you'd give the shirt off your back to help the other one out.

 

Another thing that a n00b to meassage boards doesn't understand, is that text in itself is totally emotionless.

You can say something in total jest, but then the other person can take it as totally serious and get offended.

One of the reasons for having the "smilies" is to help clarify the emotion meant in the text.

 

Just like above ^^^^ I called "pnew" a CHUCKLEHEAD in reference to his "I chuckle" post.

If I'd just left it "as is" without any smilies then it's very likely he(she?) would have gotten offended. but by adding the :D:D next to it they can get the meaning that it was all in good fun and not meant to be taken offensive in the least.

 

One thing some of the regulars have to remember (sometimes) is that we all were n00bs at one time or another.

 

I've always heard that "The only dumb question, is a question unasked!"

If we don't aske we will never learn.

 

D-man B)

 

BETEO = Be Excellent To Each Other

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The shame is though that some see us as intimidating. Maybe we need to work on that, and that includes me.

 

El diablo

I totally disagree. Respectfully, of course. :huh:

 

I won't deviate from my own nature to put on a good face for company. I would hate to see anyone else do that either. That's a little PC for my taste. Kinda like choosing cheap store brand vanilla over REAL vanilla bean. Ya dig?

 

Everyone brings a little joy to these forums.... Some when they enter and SOME when they leave.

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The shame is though that some see us as intimidating. Maybe we need to work on that, and that includes me.

 

El diablo

I totally disagree. Respectfully, of course. :huh:

 

I won't deviate from my own nature to put on a good face for company. I would hate to see anyone else do that either. That's a little PC for my taste. Kinda like choosing cheap store brand vanilla over REAL vanilla bean. Ya dig?

 

Everyone brings a little joy to these forums.... Some when they enter and SOME when they leave.

That is all well and good Snoogans, and I do not think El D. is talking about being "fake", but just trying to rely more on good old fashioned manners, instead of quick responses, that could be taken as rude, should someone not know how to "read a personality" into the post.

 

As you yourself have said, your post can push the envelope, but I have never seen one that was rude to another person, condescending, or flamed them because you did not agree with their thought/opinion.

 

PS: no machine this weekend :huh:

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Since you've asked so politely ...

 

We've dipped our toes in the water in a couple of discussion threads in the last week or two. We did a lot of 'background reading' to get a feel for the character of both the discussion groups, and we quickly identified a 'hard core' group of regulars that frequent each forum.

 

Without trying to turn this into a nationalistic argument - these forum regulars are invariably from the USA. That in itself can be intimidating - regardless of whether you speak English or not, as even the English-speakers can be 'divided by a common language'. There have been some apalling comments in the last few days at forum newbies from other countries - in some cases, simply because they come from another country. This doesn't encourage an influx of new blood.

 

The "Self-appointed Powers That Be" are also intimidating (IMHO) by regularly denigrating all facets of the game that don't match their own interpretations. The mob mentality demonstrated by some people as a result is disturbing :huh: .

 

On the whole, there is a lot of good discussion and most of it appears genuinely welcoming - it's just spoiled by a few fanatics that seem blind to any other interpretation of the game other than their own. Whilst the site may be hosted in the US, and Groundspeak a US company - with caches in more than 200 countries, there are bound to be a few differences in culture and opinion. HOWEVER ... the opinion of one country's players should not automatically override all others - a fact sometimes lost when posting emotive responses.

 

We've also been guilty of not counting to ten before hitting enter on occasion ... before anyone else has to mention it :huh:

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That is all well and good Snoogans, and I do not think El D. is talking about being "fake", but just trying to rely more on good old fashioned manners, instead of quick responses, that could be taken as rude, should someone not know how to "read a personality" into the post.

Scott, buddy, you can't remind people to have manners. You can only wish for it. (I think the recent unpleasantness on our local site proves my point.) They will either have them or they won't. It's a personal choice that we ALL make.

 

If someone is intimidated by another it's only because THEY choose to have that experience. We are all adults..... Well mostly....

 

I think 95% of the root of this perceived problem (on this site, anyway) lies with one's own level of social skill. The other 5% are people (including me and many other regular posters from time to time) who choose to be a jerk about something. I wouldn't change that 5% for ANYTHING. Wasn't it Carleenp that said, "These forums would be pretty dull without angst?"

 

I am personally glad that everyone here isn't either Ward, June, Wally, or the Beave.

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It is incredibly difficult to write in such a way that you get your point across in a clear and unambiguous way.

 

Inflection, pronounciation, pauses, and so on while speaking do NOT always appear the same when written. While 'speaking' the post to yourself, it could be the funniest thing you've ever come up with, but when written down, it takes on a whole new meaning and could be construed as being rude (or intimidating).

 

I am based in South Africa, am English speaking, and must say that the help, encouragement and unselfish assistance I have had from the forum has been of incredible value in getting involved in the sport.

 

So .... to all who have responded to my newbie questions, thanks a lot, and no, I didn't feel intimidated in the slightest.

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...Perhaps a new thread should be "Do the mods intimidate the posters?"  :huh:

That's a good one, but I'm afraid I'd be moderated if I did! :huh:

 

My earliest experiences in these forums were a little intimidating, but when I began visiting here, I was new to the Internet (and message boards, and trolls and other bad guys and flame wars).

 

So I was cautious at first, but soon after I got my feet wet, I figured out that even (most of) the flame wars and other distasteful dissertations are really just a way of geo/cyber-sparring; mostly just good, spirited fun, and mostly an exercise in communication.

 

It is well stated that the printed word is mightier than the sword. And those who use it often know all too well that it can cut, heal, embarass, etc.

 

I sincerely hope I have never intimidated anyone, and I sincerely hope El Diablo never becomes a moderator. :huh::huh:

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The "Self-appointed Powers That Be" are also intimidating (IMHO) by regularly denigrating all facets of the game that don't match their own interpretations. The mob mentality demonstrated by some people as a result is disturbing :huh: .

 

On the whole, there is a lot of good discussion and most of it appears genuinely welcoming - it's just spoiled by a few fanatics that seem blind to any other interpretation of the game other than their own.

This is just MY point of view:

 

People don't TAKE power. Power is handed over to them by people who consider themselves weaker for whatever reason.

 

In cyberspace, people CAN'T intimidate. Others ALLOW themselves to be intimidated.

 

I respect a RESPONSE ten million to one over a REACTION. It's evident in the way some people post. (Not counting to ten as they say.) I'm sure that I'm not the ONLY one who feels this way even though I'm guilty of it myself from time to time.

 

As far as the geocaching games go, some geocachers DON'T REALIZE that they have upgraded their play beyond the basic guidelines. Let's call this Geocaching version 1.0.

 

If a type "A" personality (which geocaching seems to have no shortage of) is running personal Geocaching version 4.0, they may feel that everyone else needs to upgrade to THEIR level, so THEY can continue to enjoy the game. I find this situation to be the utmost entertaining while I may in fact be running Geocaching version 3.0 myself.

 

I'll be happy to enlighten anyone to Snoogans' version of Geocaching 3.0, but the difference is that I don't NEED everyone else to bend to my will (I'd rather herd cats.) and I accept responsibility for choosing my own experiences.

 

What's a little disturbing is when the version 2.0 and above folk who squeak the loudest, actually get their way and you get more restrictive guidelines and the loss of some features. *cough* being able to post new locationless caches *cough* :huh: Next it will be lame micros *cough* :huh:

 

Here is some of the wisdom I've collected over the past couple of years. It all seems to illustrate whatever point I just made:

 

"Everyone plays their own game. There is no sense in trying to police another's mindset as long as it falls within the general parameters of the game." Me (quoting myself from the poll that I posted on 10/23/03.)

 

Great wisdom from a master TB finder:

 

"It's a web of life, in my opinion, and absolutely any movement is the next step in reaching it's goal. That weird side trip to Florida, may be the next step to Canada. And a side trip may have saved it from going MIA by pilferage in Pennsylvania."

 

bthomas on the subject of TB movement 10/27/2003

 

"I think it a rare cacher indeed that a cache has to be lame to be enjoyed.

 

So, answer me this, why are some many people catering just to them?" Coyote Red 11/2/04

 

The hider is playing a game called geocaching. They are evidently playing it right because their cache was approved.

 

You are also playing a GAME (sport/hobby/obsession/etc.) evidently called MY version of Geocaching 1.5, or maybe even 2.O. You seem to be failing at your game if you are not able to enjoy it. Snoogans 11/04/04

 

"Failure is a hard pill to swallow until you realize the only failure you can really have in this sport is the failure to enjoy yourself."

TotemLake 4/26/04

Edited by Snoogans
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On the whole, there is a lot of good discussion and most of it appears genuinely welcoming - it's just spoiled by a few fanatics that seem blind to any other interpretation of the game other than their own. Whilst the site may be hosted in the US, and Groundspeak a US company - with caches in more than 200 countries, there are bound to be a few differences in culture and opinion. HOWEVER ... the opinion of one country's players should not automatically override all others - a fact sometimes lost when posting emotive responses.

Very well said. As I've said in may different occasions, to me one of the most pleasant and important aspects of geocaching is its global nature. I try to travel a lot and I generally enjoy talking to people from different necks of this wood we call Earth. While I've had my share of forum intimidation (probably given it too), I have to say that it's very seldom when I've felt that it's because where I happen to live, there has been only couple of instances. On the contrary, I'm constantly amazed of the community togetherness feeling I get to see here every now and then.

 

I try to see things from an individual point of view. I don't say or do things because I happen to be heterosexual caucasian right-handed irreligious male from Finland. I also try not to value anyone's opinions because (s)he happens to be from the US, Germany or Australia etc, and it bugs me to see people doing that. Fortunately it's not that common here after all, and it's mostly only a few people who tend to do that. I hope we get people in the forums from many places to enrich the conversation.

Edited by Divine
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"I think it a rare cacher indeed that a cache has to be lame to be enjoyed.

 

So, answer me this, why are some many people catering just to them?" Coyote Red 11/2/04

Great, quote one of the statements that I failed to proofread. (Something that happens far too often.) How is it that you can type perfectly spelled wrong words? "Some" should have been "so."

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Most of the bashing that comes from the regulars could be avoided if the newbie just read the FAQ or tried the search feature before posting. I understand there is a need for the regulars to be polite, but newbies should meet them part way.

 

This forum tends to attract people who are not only new to the hobby, but also appear to be new to forums in general.

 

How many times have we seen this:

Hi, I'm a complete newbie and I'm so excited to try this hobby.  It looks like so much fun.  Can someone explain geocaching to me?  While you're at it, tell me what to carry in my pack, explain Project Ape, recommend a good GPSr (BTW, why use the "r"?), and describe what a micro/virtual/locationless cache is.  Oh yeah, I also want to know if it is OK to find your own cache and if you go back to a cache can you log it twice?  What does CITO mean?  How do I log a TB?  What does TPTB, TFTC, DPM, DNF, SBA, and TNLN mean?  How did caching get started?  One last thing, why does it say "tadpole" under my name?

 

In these cases even the most gracious of regulars tend to get prickly.

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In these cases even the most gracious of regulars tend to get prickly.

Then they should get out of the Getting Started forum, frankly. I'm amazed at the patience people show in Getting Started, answering the same questions over and over as if they were brand new. That area, at least, is exactly as it should be.

 

Outside of a few topically mean threads, though, this is not a particularly aggressive group in general.

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"I think it a rare cacher indeed that a cache has to be lame to be enjoyed.

 

So, answer me this, why are some many people catering just to them?" Coyote Red 11/2/04

Great, quote one of the statements that I failed to proofread. (Something that happens far too often.) How is it that you can type perfectly spelled wrong words? "Some" should have been "so."

Sorry CR. That's the first time I have reposted it. I copied it to my clipboard straight from the Highbrow thread.

 

BTW- That was probably the best debate I've been in on these forums. You're a worthy adversary. :huh:

 

I never learned much from someone that always agreed with me. :huh:

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I chuckle everytime someone slaps a new user with a Markwell (or is it a Mopar now??) for asking an honest yet frequent question. Thats definitely one way to make sure they'll never ask again :huh: . Then again some users that aren't on message boards all the time take it a little too personally. Its a mixed bag.

Why do so many people take a "markwell" as something negative? There are numerous threads out there that are chock full of great information. There is nothing wrong with pointing them out to someone who asks a question.

 

The next time someone asks about cool cache containers we've seen, do we all really need to start over? There is a thread out there with 10 pages of cool cache containers and there is no reason not to direct the person there.

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Hi, I'm a complete newbie and I'm so excited to try this hobby. It looks like so much fun. Can someone explain geocaching to me? While you're at it, tell me what to carry in my pack, explain Project Ape, recommend a good GPSr (BTW, why use the "r"?), and describe what a micro/virtual/locationless cache is. Oh yeah, I also want to know if it is OK to find your own cache and if you go back to a cache can you log it twice? What does CITO mean? How do I log a TB? What does TPTB, TFTC, DPM, DNF, SBA, and TNLN mean? How did caching get started? One last thing, why does it say "tadpole" under my name?

 

he said whilst ducking and running :huh:

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Hi, I'm a complete newbie and I'm so excited to try this hobby. It looks like so much fun. Can someone explain geocaching to me? While you're at it, tell me what to carry in my pack, explain Project Ape, recommend a good GPSr (BTW, why use the "r"?), and describe what a micro/virtual/locationless cache is. Oh yeah, I also want to know if it is OK to find your own cache and if you go back to a cache can you log it twice? What does CITO mean? How do I log a TB? What does TPTB, TFTC, DPM, DNF, SBA, and TNLN mean? How did caching get started? One last thing, why does it say "tadpole" under my name?

 

he said whilst ducking and running :huh:

Go away kid, you bother me.

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I'm probably considered a nOOb here, but if you'll look closely you'll see that I've been around since early 2001 - an oldtimer by anyone's standards. I just don't post much to this one. I have been a part of many discussion forums, and have even run a couple of them myself. I don't get intimidated by anyone, and will stand my ground in a verbal melee.

 

So why don't I participate more fully? First, as I read this, many of the posters already said what I wanted to say, and in some ways much more eloquently. I don't feel the need to say "ditto" just to cast my vote a particular way. I'll read, gather opinions, and post when I have something to say. That's just my style, and on a board as active as this one, it means I don't say much.

 

As far as new folks asking the same questions, I have absolutely no patience for those that DON'T have patience with them. They have made an effort to participate, and in most case have made the bold step in admitting their ignorance of things with which regulars are very familiar. While I would hope folks interested in the sport would at least read the FAQs, sometimes those can even be long and intimidating, and a friendly interpretation might be what they really want. As far as their searching past threads to make sure you're not asking a previously discussed item, it is only a rare new poster that will do this, so forget it.

 

It takes time and participation to develop a feel for the board. Be a welcoming mentor and answer their questions. I think that as they participate, they will see that topics tend to run in cycles, and be better able to use the board to best suit their needs. If you feel bored or impatient with those that do ask questions that have been asked earlier, then no one has obligated you to respond. There are plenty of other topics for you to express your opinion.

Edited by Beowulf83
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I understand there is a need for the regulars to be polite, but newbies should meet them part way.

 

I disagree completely.

They are "newbies"; meaning they don't know yet.

If veterans fail to see that, then they have FAILED to see that.

 

Then they should get out of the Getting Started forum, frankly. I'm amazed at the patience people show in Getting Started, answering the same questions over and over as if they were brand new. That area, at least, is exactly as it should be.

 

exactly....very well put

 

[edit]

again.....

As far as new folks asking the same questions, I have absolutely no patience for those that DON'T have patience with them.

kudos to Beowulf83

Edited by GixxerUT
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I understand there is a need for the regulars to be polite, but newbies should meet them part way.

 

I disagree completely.

They are "newbies"; meaning they don't know yet.

If veterans fail to see that, then they have FAILED to see that.

 

Then they should get out of the Getting Started forum, frankly. I'm amazed at the patience people show in Getting Started, answering the same questions over and over as if they were brand new. That area, at least, is exactly as it should be.

 

exactly....very well put

So instead of posting my diatriabe, I should have waited a few minutes and let Gixxar say for me. :huh: Much more eloquently and succinctly, I might add!

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I personally don't have a problem with newbies asking questions. We do have a few people who are really good at answering the some old questions time and again. I'm glad they are here, because patience is something I have little of.

 

My problem is some newbies with single digit finds and who have been around for an eternity--3 weeks--come in blazing opinions that run contrary to what's accepted. (Better yet, telling others how caches should be placed when they haven't placed the first one.) Then get offended that you don't fall in line because you don't accept what they have to say and accuse you of dismissing them out of hand because of their stats. Have I dismissed opinions after looking at stats? You bet. I'll fully admit to that. Why? Do you think CCCA or BruceS would really listen to me if I said they were doing it all wrong and I have a better way to find huge numbers? ...or that finding those huge numbers is wrong?

 

Well, I'm sure they would be polite at first...

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I agree completely, Coyote (not that my stat counts are anything to be proud of). In a case like that, I think it's fairly easy to spot when someone truly has a question and when someone is being a jerk. You're going to get all kinds on a discussion board - those that barge in and try to intimidate while new, and those that try to intimidate after hanging around awhile.

 

Perhaps it's less a function of how long you've been involved as it is a function of personality (or lack thereof.)

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IMHO, Belittling others is a natural evolution of bullying. Some can take it; some can't, but the bullies never change.

 

There are many extreme results of bullying/belittling and most offenders don't even know they're hurting their target. One of the less-extreme instances is refraining from posting. The bullies are actually doing it for entertainment of themselves and their cohorts.

 

A letter to Randall

 

The recent suicide by another bullied student reminded me of the letter I wrote to Randall James after his death; it was published as a Guest Editorial in Dallas Morning News. Randall was the picked-on student who shot himself in the bathroom at Richland High School a couple of years ago. Recent killings and arrests show that kids are increasingly striking back in the only way they know. Jocks and hard-core “macho” guys are driving the less-aggressive kids to kill. They nearly did it to me!

 

Dear Randall,

 

I was there.

 

I was there, Randall, when, tears in your eyes, you ran through the halls, trying to escape the taunts of fellow students. . .

 

I was there when you stood in the lunchroom, tray in hand, hoping desperately for an invitation to sit with the kids you tried so hard to admire. . .

 

I was there when adults at the teachers’ table smiled their acceptance of those kids’ cruel shouts of “Run, Randall, Run” . . .

 

I was there when you wet your pants because, unable to endure the teasing and catcalling by the jocks, you couldn’t bear to go to the bathroom. . .

 

I was there when you tried to hide your hurt by burying yourself in a book or in your computer. . .

 

I was there with you in the library when your eyes spilled tears onto your goodbye letters, and. . .

 

I was there when you made your final trip to the bathroom, but. . .

 

More than six decades ago when I was there, in the bathroom of that same North-Texas High School, I came to grips with the temptation to leave this world, opting instead to escape the misery by leaving school for the military.

 

Many of us were there with you and with others like you, Randall, fighting those urges to end our lives, or even, as some others have done, to destroy the bullies who made us miserable. You tolerated it for most of your young life, compadre, before finally deciding you’d had enough.

 

I am so sorry your teachers didn’t interfere with the ridiculing, the hooting, booing, belittling, and name-calling. You knew that they knew; their silent, smiling indulgence of the bullies’ glee merely caused your hate to spread. This, when just a few words of rebuke aimed at those schoolhouse terrorists might have saved your life!

 

And I’m sorry I couldn’t have spoken to you earlier; we might have talked about other ways to make your life bearable.

 

Sincerely,

 

Buck Buchanan

Edited by ValleyRat & TillyMouse
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The regular posters don't intimidate new or infrequent posters so much as ignore them. This is natural enough because the RPs have formed a group involved in a continuing group conversation that the new posters are barging into.

 

Newbies do sometimes get the RPs' attention...

 

My problem is some newbies with single digit finds and who have been around for an eternity--3 weeks--come in blazing opinions that run contrary to what's accepted. (Better yet, telling others how caches should be placed when they haven't placed the first one.) Then get offended that you don't fall in line because you don't accept what they have to say and accuse you of dismissing them out of hand because of their stats.

 

...and they deserve the scorch marks they receive from the ensuing flames :huh: Inexperience at Geocaching is excusable; instant know-it-all-ism is not. It takes a village to restrain its idiots.

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I spend most of my time in the Getting Started and the GPS Units and Software forums. I find the angst much lower over there. CyBret just ran a thread in Getting Started asking regulars to be kinder and gentler to newbies. I thought that his point was well taken. Although you can't make someone have manners, you can remind people that there are often kind and unkind way to share information.

 

I frequently Markwell people (In fact, I have a 30 post thread in Units and Software that is basically one long Markwell). But there is a huge difference between saying "Good question. In fact, it gave rise to a really good discussion here ," and saying, "Look here, dummy and next time use the forum search before you start a duplicate thread."

 

I don't expect you to dress up for company, but I would like it if you would at least zip up your fly.

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I chuckle everytime someone slaps a new user with a Markwell (or is it a Mopar now??) for asking an honest yet frequent question.  Thats definitely one way to make sure they'll never ask again  :huh: .  Then again some users that aren't on message boards all the time take it a little too personally.  Its a mixed bag.

Why do so many people take a "markwell" as something negative? There are numerous threads out there that are chock full of great information. There is nothing wrong with pointing them out to someone who asks a question.

 

The next time someone asks about cool cache containers we've seen, do we all really need to start over? There is a thread out there with 10 pages of cool cache containers and there is no reason not to direct the person there.

In my opinion its not the "Markwelling" that is the problem. When done in a nice, respectful manner it is very helpful. I've seen a LOT however, that are done in a condescending manner. Like getting your temperature taken, how the Markwell is administered is the key. One way is pleasant, the other not so pleasant.

 

--RuffRidr

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as a newbie to THIS forum, I don't see why being linked ("markwelled") would be considered a bad thing, or in any way a form of intimidation

it seems like just as much a service to the seeker of info, and much simpler than doing a huge quote of the entire linked thread

my hats off to those who take the time to post info OR link informative threads

 

I've seen a LOT however, that are done in a condescending manner

in that case, they are being jerks, even if they help in the process

I, personally, think more about the means to the end.....if I have to peruse through jerks to find what I am looking for, so be it

Edited by GixxerUT
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This is just MY point of view:

 

People don't TAKE power. Power is handed over to them by people who consider themselves weaker for whatever reason.

 

In cyberspace, people CAN'T intimidate. Others ALLOW themselves to be intimidated.

I agree with everything else in this post, but by definition of intimidation, power is not JUST handed over. The point is some people are deterred from posting by something that inspires fear. The power is handed over because of some action or possible action, whether imagined or real, of others.

 

Posters may consider themselves weaker because of the strongness of the regular posters' personalities. The strongness of the personalities (or whatever is intimidating to newbies) has to exist for them to feel the intimidation. You have to have one to have the other.

 

Example:

At a party, a group of people are standing around in a tight circle talking among themeselves. Some people would feel comfortable enough to go up to that circle and start talking to the people and have thick enough skin to not worry about what the people in the circle think of them barging into the conversation.

On the other hand, some people would see the circle and not feel confident enough to try to enter the conversation in the circle.

 

But the circle had to exist for the person to feel intimidated in the first place. Okay, maybe a circle didn't have to exist for the person to feel intimidated, but the circle would be far more intimidating than just people mingling freely about a party, no? The friendliness among the regular posters could feel a little cliquey at times, but that's normal on any board.

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When I first started to venture into the forums , and made my first posting , I did in fact feel ... I am not quite sure that intimidated fits , but perhaps slighted is a better word. I was told that I needed to take my question to the whine and cry forum . Which at the time I did not understand what was meant by that statement but I sure do now. :huh: . But the reponse did almost keep me from coming back . I was going to just let the forums alone and let my team mate have at them as he is the one whom kept telling me what was going on in them.

 

I will say I am glad I chose to stick around as I do have fun in the forums and enjoy the talk. However I do at times still feel slighted and ignored even now, and that some of "us" seasoned forum regulars do tend to be a bit rough and unforgiving of a simple question.

 

And yes one time , a debate that was happening even in the off topic forums did in fact make me very upset and want to start crying . But then again that had everything to do with politics which will in some places even insite a riot ! :huh: But after stating how these posters were making me feel they clairified what it was they were meaning exactally and it made it all better . :huh:

 

So to you newbies or lurkers please forgive us when we become less then pleasant . Its not always like that. There are still a few regulars that intimidate me. But I keep coming back as there are also a few that have become like family .

 

And to the Regulars... I agree, sometimes we need to think a bit more before we post a response to a post by a non-regular or a newbie. AND PLEASE PLEASE forgive my poor spelling ! :huh:

 

 

Star of Team Tigger International ....

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It doesn't seem to happen as much as in the past but I have seen several occasions where some of the regulars would bash a newbie for asking a question that may have been rehashed over and over.

 

For example I've seen new people ask questions about "Why can't I post a virtual". Instead of getting a reply answering the question they will post pictures of "Beating a dead horse" etc..

 

For someone making their first post in a forum and the first answer they get is someone making them feel stupid for asking what they thought was a legitimate question may put a sour taste in their mouth.

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I'm pretty much in line with what CoyoteRed said. The response from the "regulars" seems to largely depend upon 1) the contentiousness of the topic being discussed and 2) the tone of the other members.

 

While I rarely see new members being intimidated directly, I would certainly agree that some of the constant, burning disagreements between certain "regulars" could easily be perceived as intimidating. Why should they, as a newbie, post to this forum when the regular members treat each other with such contempt at times?

 

On the other hand, this is a comparatively civil forum (with the occasional eruption, of course!) relative to other forums I've seen. I don't consider myself a "forum junkie"--frankly, I hate forums--so I normally stay out of them.

 

For some reason I seem to have manged to have a relatively high post count here, so I guess it speaks to the fact that I don't personally feel intimidated. If there's a nasty topic I simply stay out of it and all is well.

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as a newbie to THIS forum, I don't see why being linked ("markwelled") would be considered a bad thing, or in any way a form of intimidation

it seems like just as much a service to the seeker of info, and much simpler than doing a huge quote of the entire linked thread

my hats off to those who take the time to post info OR link informative threads

 

I've seen a LOT however, that are done in a condescending manner

in that case, they are being jerks, even if they help in the process

I, personally, think more about the means to the end.....if I have to peruse through jerks to find what I am looking for, so be it

Speaking as - um - Markwell...

 

It should be noted that I made the distinction long ago: I don't take offense at the term markwelling, when it's done politely.

 

130036_5500.gif

Goofus' post:

Hey dufus - try hitting the search button (that thing that looks like this: atb_search.gif) and reading up on the topic before you come trouncing in here to blather your stupidity

 

130036_5400.gif

Gallant's post:

That's a good question. A lot of answers can be found here, and we first started talking about ithere.

 

I would prefer that the former not be markwelling, but I guess I'll take the good and the bad.

 

That would be like saying that Translating an important document into various languages shall henceforth be known as "Cybretting" and sometime down the road when people translate something poorly into gobbledygook, it gets lumped in with "Cybretting." :huh:

 

========================================

 

For those that care to read it, the first use of "markwelling" - can be found in this markwell.

Edited by Markwell
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I rarely post in the forums not because I have given POWER to others to intimidate me, but rather because I've decided that the "cost" of posting usually exceeds the "benefits", if you will. I lurk around very frequently and learn alot that way, but when I need to ask a question or join the conversation, I'll usually choose either my regional forum or a totally innocuous topic, like Original Haikus, or something.

 

It's not that I've been personally intimidated, but I've observed a lot of other, braver newbies get shot down and I do have thin enough skin that I know I would take that more personally than I should, so I just choose not to subject myself to it. (Man, the grammar of that last sentence needs help - oh well.)

 

I do clearly remember one recent thread in which someone got summarily banned for a week for what looked to me like simply poking good-natured fun at someone's avatar. I was so appalled at the harsh response that I e-mailed the cacher in question to ask if there was something more going on or some past history that warranted that action. My e-mail was the only notice he'd had that he had been banned - no warning, no e-mail notification, nothing. He had just been unable to log in and couldn't figure out why. He hadn't even been able to see the post telling everyone else that he had been banned. That seriously spooked me!

 

As for all on-line boards being this way, I disagree. Granted, I have little experience in the matter, but 3 other forums I frequent - all of them camping related - rarely, if ever, sink to flaming and I've always felt very comfortable posting in them.

 

JMHO

Mrs. Car54

 

P.S. At the risk of being told that we shouldn't mention individuals, I just want to say that I've always found carleenp's posts to be helpful and respectful and I really enjoy Auntie Weasel's sense of humor. :huh:

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I'm a newbie and yes I feel intimidated by the forums regulars. Need an example, how about trgrhappy's post in this topic. While such posts can be funny, they intimidate the newbie that’s asking for help. I have been treated well on this forum, and I have had questions answered by forum regulars, notably "sputnic 57", but I have dozens of other questions that I hesitated (and would like) to ask. What I don't understand is if regulars don't want to read or answer an obviously newbie question, don't. And why do some feel they have to post first, and with "do a search". Over the last two months I have spent more time on Groundspeak than most, watching and searching for answers, some without success. For one I have found the Groundspeak “search” failing, two this site is huge, and three (and most important) even when I do find an answer I often don't understand.

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I'm just curious how many other people feel intimidated by the forums regular posters?

 

I can see how people would feel this way. I don't particularly like the forum culture here, for what it's worth. (Not very much, I know.)

 

I think I speak for many others when I say that we would never ridicule unless on extreme basis.

 

I think this is precisely why people are ridiculed - some folks go from zero to *extreme* really fast. I think it's better to never ridicule - it's fine to argue with someone you don't agree with - it just shouldn't get personal. If somone posts something that is just obviously and flagrantly inappropriate, it's better to just moderate it and be done with it. (Not that moderation is particularly pleasant either. No criticism of the moderators is implied by that statement, either. They are swell.)

 

I appreciate your starting this topic. I think it's appropriate and respectfully done.

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I think I speak for many others when I say that we would never ridicule unless on extreme basis.

This just isn't true. I've seen newbies flamed time and again in here. Not that I'm not guilty of it myself, although I can't think of a specific case where it's been done by anyone, it happens a lot.

 

I can see why a non-poster would be afraid, especially if they had thin skin.

Well they won't do it in this thread.

 

El Diablo

Then ED, yours will be in rare company.

 

There is a lot of flaming going on. More important on this board are the screaming posts.

 

If anyone suggests that perhaps, just perhaps, some kind of discussion should be held that a rule be added or an existing rule be interpreted more strictly, there will be a flock of scream posts that all go along a line of:

 

1. "WE DON'T WANT ANY MORE RULES!"

2. "JUST PLAY THE GAME YOUR WAY!"

 

and so on.

 

There is precious little discussion that doesn't get some scream post trying to block out discussion. This turns me off, and I now find myself posting alot more to the HAM forum here where we get to have quiet and helpful discussions.

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I rarely post in the forums not because I have given POWER to others to intimidate me, but rather because I've decided that the "cost" of posting usually exceeds the "benefits", if you will. I lurk around very frequently and learn alot that way, but when I need to ask a question or join the conversation, I'll usually choose either my regional forum or a totally innocuous topic, like Original Haikus, or something.

 

It's not that I've been personally intimidated, but I've observed a lot of other, braver newbies get shot down and I do have thin enough skin that I know I would take that more personally than I should, so I just choose not to subject myself to it. (Man, the grammar of that last sentence needs help - oh well.)

 

I do clearly remember one recent thread in which someone got summarily banned for a week for what looked to me like simply poking good-natured fun at someone's avatar. I was so appalled at the harsh response that I e-mailed the cacher in question to ask if there was something more going on or some past history that warranted that action. My e-mail was the only notice he'd had that he had been banned - no warning, no e-mail notification, nothing. He had just been unable to log in and couldn't figure out why. He hadn't even been able to see the post telling everyone else that he had been banned. That seriously spooked me!

 

As for all on-line boards being this way, I disagree. Granted, I have little experience in the matter, but 3 other forums I frequent - all of them camping related - rarely, if ever, sink to flaming and I've always felt very comfortable posting in them.

 

JMHO

Mrs. Car54

 

P.S. At the risk of being told that we shouldn't mention individuals, I just want to say that I've always found carleenp's posts to be helpful and respectful and I really enjoy Auntie Weasel's sense of humor. :huh:

Excellent Post! What she said. :huh:

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I'm a newbie and yes I feel intimidated by the forums regulars. Need an example, how about trgrhappy's post in this topic. While such posts can be funny, they intimidate the newbie that’s asking for help.

Very good point, and I hadn't looked at it that way. I was intending to make a joke, but can see how it might be taken the wrong way.

 

I appreciate it being pointed out, and I am being serious about this post.

thanks

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I'm a newbie and yes I feel intimidated by the forums regulars. Need an example, how about trgrhappy's post in this topic. While such posts can be funny, they intimidate the newbie that’s asking for help.

Very good point, and I hadn't looked at it that way. I was intending to make a joke, but can see how it might be taken the wrong way.

 

I appreciate it being pointed out, and I am being serious about this post.

thanks

 

Please I didn't mean to point a finger at you personally, and I understood you were joking, I was just trying to point out this is the kind of reply I and other newbies find intimidating when all we're asking for is answers.

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I'm a newbie and yes I feel intimidated by the forums regulars. Need an example, how about trgrhappy's post in this topic. While such posts can be funny, they intimidate the newbie that’s asking for help. I have been treated well on this forum, and I have had questions answered by forum regulars, notably "sputnic 57", but I have dozens of other questions that I hesitated (and would like) to ask. What I don't understand is if regulars don't want to read or answer an obviously newbie question, don't. And why do some feel they have to post first, and with "do a search". Over the last two months I have spent more time on Groundspeak than most, watching and searching for answers, some without success. For one I have found the Groundspeak “search” failing, two this site is huge, and three (and most important) even when I do find an answer I often don't understand.

 

Hide-and-Seek,

 

Look in the bottom left corner of this post. If you have a question & like a particular 'Regular' -- or what my husband & I call 'old timers' you can either click on the PM or the E-Mail button of that particular poster to send your query & get some personal advice or answers.

 

We have gotten both PM's & E-Mail from several cachers & benchies that are fairly new to the whole thing. We also have gotten requests by others that stems directly from a certain thread that we have posted to.

 

We are always ready & willing to answer all questions to the best of our ability or can offer another person to get in touch with.

 

So if you feel uncertain or shy about posting in the forums....just pick someone that you feel comfortable with & send them a note.

 

Since we should not name anyone specifically, I cannot warn you against someone....but if you lurk in the forums for a couple of days....you will get a feel of whom to avoid because you would be bothering them.

 

Most people are very willing to help...just give us a chance. :huh:

 

Shirley~

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