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sept1c_tank

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Post (or link) a humorous one-line,

out-of-context quote

from the Groundspeak "Geocaching Topics" forums.

 

Rules:

 

Quotes should not violate Groundspeak forum guidelines.

 

Quotes must have originated in the Geocaching Topics discussion.

 

Include the name of the poster, and the time and date of the post.

 

Quotes may not include any form of the word "geocache."

 

Quotes may not include another geocacher’s name.

 

Quotes may not refer to the subject of the topic from which they are taken.

 

Quotes must be 15 words or less.

 

No photos, please.

 

 

Here’s one to kick it off:

 

"You have foiled my fiendish plan. Till next time, Danger Mouse!" :ph34r:<_<

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From this thread, the most hilarious post EVER!>>>>>>>>>>>>

 

Well, I'd usually say FROG is the obvious answer, but you know what?

 

I like monkeys.

 

The pet store was selling them for 5¢ each. I thought that was odd since they were normally a couple thousand dollars each. I decided not to look a gift horse in the mouth.

 

I bought 200.

 

I like monkeys.

 

I took my 200 monkeys home.

 

I have a big car.

 

I let one of them drive. His name was Sigmund.

 

He was retarded. In fact, none of them were really bright. They kept punching themselves in their genitals.

 

I laughed.

 

Then they punched my genitals.

 

I stopped laughing.

 

I herded them into my apartment.

 

They didn't adapt very well to their new environment.

 

They would screech, hurl themselves off of the couch at high speeds and slam into the wall.

 

Although humorous at first, the spectacle lost its novelty halfway into its third hour.

 

Two hours later I found out why all the monkeys were so inexpensive: they all died.

 

No apparent reason.

 

They all just sort of dropped dead.

 

Kind odd like when you buy a goldfish and it dies five hours later.

 

dadgum cheap monkeys.

 

I didn't know what to do. There were 200 dead monkeys lying all over my apartment. On the bed, in the dresser, hanging from my bookcase.

 

It looked like I had 200 throw rugs.

 

I tried to flush one down the toilet.

 

It didn't work. It got stuck.

 

Then I had one dead, wet monkey and 199 dead, dry monkeys.

 

I tried pretending that they were just stuffed animals.

 

That worked for a while.

 

That is until they began to decompose.

 

Then it started to smell real bad.

 

I had to pee but there was a dead monkey in the toilet and I didn't want to call the plumber.

 

I was embarrassed.

 

I tried to slow down the decomposition by freezing them.

 

Unfortunately, there was only enough room for two monkeys at a time, so I had to change them every 30 seconds.

 

I also had to eat all the food in the freezer so it didn't all go bad.

 

I tried burning them.

 

Little did I know my bed was flammable.

 

I had to extinguish the fire.

 

Then I had one dead, wet monkey in my toilet, two dead, frozen monkeys in my freezer, and 197 dead, charred monkeys in a pile on my bed.

 

The odor wasn't improving.

 

I became agitated at my inability to dispose of my monkeys or use the bathroom.

 

I severely beat one of my monkeys.

 

I felt better.

 

I tried throwing them way but the garbage man said that the city wasn't allowed to dispose of charred primates.

 

I told him that I had a wet one.

 

He couldn't take that one either.

 

I didn't bother asking about the frozen ones.

 

I finally arrived at a solution.

 

I gave them out as Christmas gifts.

 

My friends didn't know quite what to say.

 

They pretended that they like them but I could tell they were lying.

 

Ingrates.

 

So I punched them in the genitals.

 

I like monkeys.

 

I guess I'll have to put them in a cache.

 

Joel (joefrog)

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I gotta agree with Snoogans here. In fact that one cracked me up so much I created this TB: Monkey of the Year! <_<

Now I need to think about an answer to the OP before I derail this thread any more. :ph34r:

I'm still looking for that bug to come near my area!

 

Here's one:

About 50% of the posts to this topic, including the original post, are on-topic, in that they draw parallels between this movie and geocaching.

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Um... are people even reading the rules?

In my excitement I broke several of them. One, twice!

 

Oh, well, I thought my contribution was the funny thing I had ever come across anywhere in the forums.

 

Sorry.

I'm not sure what rules you broke? It was from Geocaching Topics, it was one line, it was humorous, and since I don't know the context, I guess it could be called out of context.

 

Are there other rules that I am not aware of? :lol::rolleyes:

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Um... are people even reading the rules?

In my excitement I broke several of them. One, twice!

 

Oh, well, I thought my contribution was the funny thing I had ever come across anywhere in the forums.

 

Sorry.

I'm not sure what rules you broke? It was from Geocaching Topics, it was one line, it was humorous, and since I don't know the context, I guess it could be called out of context.

 

Are there other rules that I am not aware of? :lol::rolleyes:

It was over 15 words and mentioned another geocacher's name. Darn funny quote though! :lol:

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Um... are people even reading the rules?

In my excitement I broke several of them. One, twice!

 

Oh, well, I thought my contribution was the funny thing I had ever come across anywhere in the forums.

 

Sorry.

I'm not sure what rules you broke? It was from Geocaching Topics, it was one line, it was humorous, and since I don't know the context, I guess it could be called out of context.

 

Are there other rules that I am not aware of? :lol::rolleyes:

It exceeded the maximum number of words, and it mentioned the names of two other geocachers.

 

God forbid that we should advocate letting a bunch of silly rules get in the way of having a good time.

 

Wait... I didn't mean that...

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(I still don't know how to link directly to the right post within the thread.  Help, anyone?)

To link to a post in another thread, you must first locate the post. Taking note of the date and time of the post, click on the poster’s name. This takes you to their profile page. Here, you click on “See the forum posts for this user.” Scroll through the posts until you find the correct one (this is when it is helpful to know the date and time of the post).

 

When you have located the correct post, click on “post preview,” located @ the bottom of the post. That brings you back to the topic (at the correct place in the thread to view it) and the desired post.

 

Now go to the top of your screen and copy the url address. Next, set up a reply in the topic of your choice. You will see a button above the text box: http:// Click on it.

 

Paste the copied url address in the provided field and hit OK. Now type in the new field provided. What you type will appear as the link to the url you pasted.

 

Like this: But if it'll make everyone feel better, I'm sorry--really, really sorry.

or

Just wait until sept1c_tank sees this... :rolleyes::lol:

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Another (and much quicker) way is to hit the little link that says "posted" above the post. That will give you the url that you can copy and paste into your reply.

 

I'm not sure when that showed up, I just discovered it the other day.

Edited by carleenp
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Um... are people even reading the rules?

In my excitement I broke several of them. One, twice!

 

Oh, well, I thought my contribution was the funny thing I had ever come across anywhere in the forums.

 

Sorry.

I'm not sure what rules you broke? It was from Geocaching Topics, it was one line, it was humorous, and since I don't know the context, I guess it could be called out of context.

 

Are there other rules that I am not aware of? :rolleyes::lol:

15 words or less and not mention another cacher's name. I guess I'm allowed to slide on a another one or two because I linked directly.

 

EDIT: Lep was quicker!

Edited by CoyoteRed
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Another (and much quicker) way is to hit the little link that says "posted" above the post. That will give you the url that you can copy and paste into your reply.

 

I'm not sure when that showed up, I just discovered it the other day.

Very cool Carleen! I've never noticed that either. Thanks for the heads up!

 

I once came across a stash of porn mags in a graveyard! :(

 

Um, even the OP didn't follow his own rules ... And because he is my boss, I'll shut-up now. 

 

OK. I've been trying to figure out how I did this. Please enlighten me! :blink:

Maybe a muggle left the rose.

 

:P

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Um, even the OP didn't follow his own rules ... And because he is my boss, I'll shut-up now. 

 

OK. I've been trying to figure out how I did this. Please enlighten me! :blink:

 

:P

Maybe the comment wasn't respectful?

 

Maybe Danger Mouse was the OP's real name? :(

Edited by Ambrosia
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Um, even the OP didn't follow his own rules ... And because he is my boss, I'll shut-up now. 

 

OK. I've been trying to figure out how I did this. Please enlighten me! :blink:

 

:P

Maybe the comment wasn't respectful?

 

Maybe Danger Mouse was the OP's real name? :(

LOL !!! No, I'm afraid its much more 'nit picky' than that... Its the rule below that I thought was broken ...

Include the name of the poster, and the time and date of the post.

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