On Selecting a Finder for your Cache

24.7k · July 25, 2003

With so many threads on a good cache we have overlooked an obvious truth. It’s cache placers who make the world go round. Finders come along after the cache is placed.

I’m proposing a few rules on cache finders. That’s right, the idiots and dweebes who with a few kind folks mixed in are the ones out there doing battle to find, plunder and otherwise ruin our caches we have worked so hard to place. We all know it’s the few kindly folks who make it worthwhile and all the rest are no better than sand in your shorts on a hot and humid day.

Rule number one. No Cache Pirates. A plundered cache is no good to anyone. I’m not ever in the mood for this kind of behavior so in my role as cache god (with apologies to God) I’d make two small changes. The first is that you would get bused stealing and serve time. The second would be to have one tattoo for each item ever stolen somewhere on your body. Things could take care of themselves after that. For example when you bend over in prison to pick up the soap, your shower buddy will notice the tupperware tattoo on your butt cheek. Now I don’t know what he will be thinking at that time but it won’t be about what a manly man you are.

Rule Number Two. No Lurkers. Even a dweeb can appreciate a cache and say so right before he tells you he traded a broken McToy for the Moun10Bike coin. Lurkers who find caches and don’t log are the bottom of the scum barrel after Cache Pirates. For those who break this rule the punishment would be to forever hear the comment from their significant other “Whenever we are together it’s like you are not even there” That should teach them the value of active participation.

Rule Number Three. No Log Misers. That’s right, spank that keyboard. All logs are required to be at least mildly interesting. No logs that say “Found It, Thanks” are allowed. If you bled, tell us. If you busted a cache pirate with his shower buddy in the rest area, tell us. No need for a curse here. Odds are there is someone out there haunting your memory with what might have been if only you had said something more than nothing.

Rule Number Four. No Whiners. The beautiful thing here is that you don’t have to lift a finger to punish them for inflicting their whines upon you. They already have a life of soggy corn flakes and perpetual constipation to look forward too.

Rule Number Five. No Evil Skinflints. It’s only a rumor that you can trade your way up to a Ferrari. But if you succeeded in trading down a string of caches until you have that Ferrari may your anal tightwad ways expanded your butt in direct proportion to the consternation you have caused others. With any luck you won’t be able wedge it through the car doors. Enjoy that bucko.

Rule Number Six. No Second Guessers. It’s none of your business who, what, when, why, or how I placed my cache. Unless you want to flatter me by asking about my cache to place one like it in your turf don’t go there. For those special few may all your caches have technical questions and forever be the topic of discussion in the forums. May the police ask you why you are parking there, the rangers ask you why you are in the woods, your boss ask you why he even hired you, and the cache pirates ask you why you are in their rest area with a wink.

Rule Number Seven. No Cache Spoilers. Why go and ruin a perfectly good cache by posting a spoiler? Use the encrypt the log if you need it, or talk around the subject. Others will know what you mean when they have found the cache. For you I’m thinking all romantic evenings should be ended by a call from the babysitter, or your ex, all relaxing moments will be punctuated by a telemarketer on your cell phone. Movie night will be accented by always having one friend with you who has seen the move and can’t shut up about how it ends. That should teach you the value of a good ending.

Rule Number Eight. No Cache Modifiers. You should hide it like you found it or harder. Don’t leave it uncovered, or in the open, or move it 4’ over because you like that spot better. If this lesson is a hard one to learn then perhaps always having your adult toy drawer discovered by all house guests, in a month when every night is irrevocably booked for entertaining at home will drive home the point.

Rule Number Nine. No Wimps. You can get hurt. Bad. If you do get hurt and it didn’t kill you, tell us about it and how you converted your friendly local EMT crew, Dr., Nurse, hospital admissions staff, candy striper, room mate, and physical therapist into geocachers. Remember it’s your enthusiasm that‘s going to keep you out of shock and alive. It’s the will to live to get even with that cache that got you this time around that will keep you going until they can patch you up almost good as new. On the other hand if you insist on being a wimp life is its own punishment as “Whipped” is already your middle name. Remember you don’t have to be macho, just not a wimp.

Rule Number Ten. No High Maintenance Types. If you are so dadgum picky that the cache sucks, the car ride sucks, your cache partner sucks, the trade items suck, the log book sucks, the cache type sucks, the hike sucks, the scenery sucks, the hide sucks, and about everything else sucks, then I have a solution and geocaching isn’t it. Your curse will be to become compulsive at your chief complaint in life. Your future would involve chrome trailer hitches, and starting Harley’s.

Who should find a cache? I’m in with Ted Kooser I like his taste.

9.1k · July 25, 2003

This is one of those posts that I'll remember months later. A forums classic. A worthy, albeit "edgy", substitute for the "Guide to finding a cache" here on the site.

As a cache hider and conscientious finder, I tip my hat to you.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Next time, instead of getting married, I think I'll just find a woman I don't like and buy her a house.

July 25, 2003

Accurate and covers the issues well.

July 25, 2003

Could you post this on the getting started side?

This space for rent

July 25, 2003

quote:
Rule Number Three... No logs that say “Found It, Thanks” are allowed.

If my log on your cache says "Found It, Thanks" that's code for Your Cache Sucked.

No way am I giving up THAT.

Ode to a Pigeon: Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, You Lookin' at Me? YOU LOOKIN' AT ME?! (b. katt, 7/14/03)

July 25, 2003

Covered just about everything.

"Reputation is what men and women think of us; character is what God and angels know of us" - Thomas Paine

3.2k · July 25, 2003

quote:
Originally posted by enfanta:

If my log on your cache says "Found It, Thanks" that's code for Your Cache Sucked.

No way am I giving up THAT.

I got a question here, sorry if it takes this off topic, how does a cache suck?

Either it was real easy (which brought up YOUR stats), it was real hard (which helped hone YOUR skills) or it didn't have 'cool' items (which means your doing this for the wrong reasons).

I'm not taking infanta to task, I have just seen other posts or logs that say "this sucks!" that I wished they had only used infanta's method to relay the information.

No caches, no geocaching. It's not like we pay people to put these things out there.

July 25, 2003

Well, one: it's Enfanta.

And two, if you rate your cache as a 4/1 I expect a better hide than in a tree trunk. If there's a terribly cool feature in the area and the best you can do is pitch it next to a rotten log, you aren't trying very hard, are you?

quote:
It's not like we pay people to put these things out there.

Very true. So it's not like I can ask for my money (and time) back, can I? It's a two-way street. You put thought into your cache, I'll put thought into my cache log. We can all tell who took the time to prepare a cool hunt and who just flung some Tupperware in the woods and considered their job done. Those folks will get a "TNLN, thx" from me.

Ode to a Pigeon: Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, You Lookin' at Me? YOU LOOKIN' AT ME?! (b. katt, 7/14/03)

1.4k · July 25, 2003

quote:
Originally posted by Baloo&bd:

I got a question here, sorry if it takes this off topic, how does a cache suck?

Either it was real easy (which brought up YOUR stats), it was real hard (which helped hone YOUR skills) or it didn't have 'cool' items (which means your doing this for the wrong reasons).

I'm not taking infanta to task, I have just seen other posts or logs that say "this sucks!" that I wished they had only used infanta's method to relay the information.

No caches, no geocaching. It's not like we pay people to put these things out there.

How does a cache suck? It's in a non-weatherproof container in a wet area. It's started out with just junk inside (not the main reason for caching, but shows a lack of caring about the cache). It's just tossed behind a log when a much more interesting place is close by. It's placed to just have another cache out there (if you're doing this to increase your find count, you're doing this for the wrong reasons). The coords could be off. There are a lot of ways a cache can suck.

---Real men cache in shorts.

July 25, 2003

I have to agree with Enfanta here. My level of effort in the log is generally a reflection of my perceived effort that went into the cache. Call this quality or lack of the same, but a leaky, ill planned/maintained, thin plastic salad container chucked into a hole is not my ideal cache. Rather than offend someone who may not know any better, I prefer to make a minimal comment and save my remarks for something better.

Clearly, there are caches that probably should just go away on both the virtual and traditional side of the tracks. I don't happen to feel the need to be the police since cache Darwinism will eventually kick in on it's own.

Success is not measured by the position one has reached in life, rather by the obstacles overcome while trying to succeed.

- Booker T. Washington

3.2k · July 25, 2003

quote:
Originally posted by bigcall:
I have to agree with _E_nfanta here.

- Booker T. Washington

First, OK Guys, I mis-spelled the name. Sorry. I looked at it, read it correctly and STILL typed it wrong. Got to stop writing these while on conference calls.

I guess I need to clarify here, I just used Enfanta's post as a springboard to ask a question. If you look at my post, I never mentioned anything about the TNLN, THanks type post. Whil I would much prefer to see something more descriptive...well...that's my problem, not the poster/logger.

My point was I see post about caches "sucking" a lot lately and wanted to know how it could. I can see where it is frustrating to spend a bunch of time to find a unkept cache, however I am more in it for the hunt. To me the quality of the actual cache is just gravy.

I know I plan soon on planting some and have taken the negative and positive I have seen here into account.

Please, I did not intend to offend, even with my mussbellt wurds.

July 25, 2003

quote:
Originally posted by Baloo&bd:
My point was I see post about caches "sucking" a lot lately and wanted to know how it could.

My nomination

I would say that any cache that is hidden beside a parking lot that is strewn with trash is a candidate for that term. I could not distinguish the cache from trash.

Fro.

________________________________________

Geocaching . . . hiking with a purpose

24.7k · July 25, 2003

quote:
Originally posted by Baloo&bd:
I got a question here, sorry if it takes this off topic, how does a cache suck?

Baloo&bd, that you don't even understand the concept of how a cache could suck is just a feather in your cap.

You are the guy who could go to the worst cache ever placed and have one hell of a time just because you were on an adventure.

Life is it's own reward. If you take time to notice the roses that suck...nevermind... the ones that do won't get it.

July 25, 2003

quote:
Originally posted by Renegade Knight:

Hear, hear! Well said R.K.

Randy

July 25, 2003

Renegade Knight,

Nicely written, I try to adhere to those rules, I've only 26 finds, but I've enjoyed and bled some, been bitten by Sand Fleas, Horse Flies, Deer Flies, Skeeters (The Official New Jersey Bird of Prey), and Spiders, brushed off Ticks, and have generally had the time of my life.

Take Care,

Mike

"Deep in the Heart of Jersey"

July 25, 2003

quote:
My point was I see post about caches "sucking" a lot lately and wanted to know how it could. I can see where it is frustrating to spend a bunch of time to find a unkept cache, however I am more in it for the hunt. To me the quality of the actual cache is just gravy.

Ah! I think we are talking at cross-purposes. I think that when you say "cache" you mean the actual container and its contents. I say "cache" and I mean the territory, the hunt and the container.

200 feet off the road by a rotten log isn't much of a hunt for me and though it would be going a bit far to say it "sucked," still, I would not be delighted enough to leave a wicked keen log.

Ode to a Pigeon: Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, You Lookin' at Me? YOU LOOKIN' AT ME?! (b. katt, 7/14/03)

38.2k · July 25, 2003

quote:
quote:Originally posted by Baloo&bd:
My point was I see post about caches "sucking" a lot lately and wanted to know how it could.

My nomination

I would say that any cache that is hidden beside a parking lot that is strewn with trash is a candidate for that term. I could not distinguish the cache from trash.

Fro.

Fro, that is a great example. When I think of lousy caches, there's one just outside Holmdel that is my model, but this one beats it!

"Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish, he'll sit in a boat and drink beer all day" - Dave Barry

6.5k · July 25, 2003

Outstanding job RK. You really summed it up; and it is refreshing to see a well thought out mature post in here for a change.

And now for something completely different :

Rule number 11: No Poufters!

Sorry couldn't resist. I missed out on the movie lines thread.

These changes in latitudes, changes in attitudes;

Nothing remains quite the same.

Through all of the islands and all of the highlands,

If we couldn't laugh we would all go insane

1.1k · July 25, 2003

Well said RK and the next time I am in your neck of the woods or your over here in Bend, I'll look you up and buy YOU a beer. Or a Grape Nehi. Your choice.

logscaler.

July 25, 2003

quote:
by RK

Rule Number Three. No Log Misers. That’s right, spank that keyboard. All logs are required to be at least mildly interesting. No logs that say “Found It, Thanks” are allowed. If you bled, tell us. If you busted a cache pirate with his shower buddy in the rest area, tell us. No need for a curse here. Odds are there is someone out there haunting your memory with what might have been if only you had said something more than nothing.

Rule Number Four. No Whiners. The beautiful thing here is that you don’t have to lift a finger to punish them for inflicting their whines upon you. They already have a life of soggy corn flakes and perpetual constipation to look forward too.

But I'm having a hard time reconciling #3 & #4!

If I'm not a log miser and I tell you that you're 1 1/2; 2 cache should have been a 3 1/2; 4 and that I bled more than I had bandaids for and the poison ivy should wear off in a week or two - then . . . I'm violating #4 because I'm whining! Since I don't look forward to soggy cornflakes - I prefer to leave a short, non-accusatory note saying "hey - thanks for placing the cache!" or whatever! Even if my thoughts are adding *%&^*())#$

"Geocaching expands your horizons - not your butt!"

July 25, 2003

quote:
Originally posted by Baloo&bd:
I got a question here, sorry if it takes this off topic, how does a cache suck?

Either it was real easy (which brought up YOUR stats), it was real hard (which helped hone YOUR skills) or it didn't have 'cool' items (which means your doing this for the wrong reasons).

How about the ones that bring you to a field of trash knee-deep, or through the bedroom of a half-dozen homeless folks, or just ouside the fence of a sewage treatment plant?

I have seen some caches where I have to stop and wonder why someone thought that was a good place for one. Did some effort go into it? Yes. Does that minimal effort of tossing a gladware container with a logbook and McToys qualify as enough that the cache can never be criticized? That is something each of us has to decide. Is a cache placed for the sole purpose of placing a cache a good idea?

Hopefully cache hiders will put some effort into planning and locating a cache. Sometimes it doesn't show.

Can you really be saying that there is no way any cache can ever suck?

Dave_W6DPS

My two cents worth, refunds available on request. (US funds only)

July 26, 2003

I think this is an excellent post and about what hiders expect from finders when they log is an excellent point and should be included in the rules. I still consider myself a newbie only being here a month. I do have about 20 finds and 3 newbies and counting under my belt. I do try and always thank the people that hide caches but I dont leave real detailed logs but I will from this point forward, knowing thats what hiders want. I plan on hiding a few myself in the near future and I'm sure I would expect the same. I would ask one thing of all you vets out there just be patient with us newbies we will be vets of this one day too. The way we learn is by reading your posts.

Thanks!

BullDogBob

"WITHOUT GEOGRAPHY YOU'RE NOWHERE....Jimmy Buffett

July 27, 2003

I got arrested once for spanking my keyboard in public, can I keep my logs short (hey that sounds dirty too).

_________________________________________________________

If trees could scream, would we still cut them down?

Well, maybe if they screamed all the time, for no reason.

Click here for my Geocaching pictures and Here (newest)

July 27, 2003

Thank you R.K., for expressing how many of us feel. I never just hap-hazardly place a cache. Most of my caches usually take a good 2 - 3 months for me to put together and find a suitable place to hide them.

While I've never really had a problem with the brevity of a finders log, its the trading down part that REALLY urks me. As an example I give you this one. I spent 4 months gathering just the right treasures to place in it, only to have the contents reduced to fecal matter by the first group to find it. Not that I'm whining, I fully expect a cache to decline in quality OVER TIME, not at the first finder.

Thanks for enduring my micro rant, I'm off now.

___________________________________________

Cum catapultae proscriptae erat,

tum soli proscript catapultas habeunt.

July 27, 2003

Thanks for an entertaining rant R.K...

We went out this morning to do some cache maintenance (and finding). Imagine our surprise when we couldn't find one of our caches that had been logged the day before. It turned out that a previous finder couldn't figure out how to put it back where he found it, so he hid it in a new spot. His log did note that he thought the original hiding spot was harder than the posted difficulty rating.

Even funnier was another log that was at the cache but not online. The finder noted that they took a pocket compass and left a business card of one of their friends. That's what I call trading up!

The antics of some of the finders has provided a source of amusement for Team Geo-Jedi. Maintaining one's sense of humor is an essential part of keeping fun in this game. That folks so clueless about the guidelines can actually find these caches also seems quite amazing.

Again, thanks for the rant.

Team Geo-Jedi

Team Geo-Jedi, Searchers 4 Ground Truth

July 27, 2003

I’m not the most imaginative person and I’m not the most energetic person, but when I hide a cache, I try to imagine that it will be found by a local cacher when taking a newspaper/television reporter who is doing a story on geocaching out on an actual find. Will it reflect well on the geocaching community?

I realize that the logs will be my primary source of feedback. So, I hope that everyone who logs my caches is being honest with me when they say; “Thanks for the hide.” If they say that, it must be an okay cache (i.e. doesn’t suck). I try to be honest in my logs, polite, but honest. If the cache “really sucks” I will also include suggestions for improvement in an e-mail to the owner.

When I come across a cache that appears that the owner tossed the Gladware container full of McToys out of the car window and hit the “Man Overboard” feature on the GPSr and logged it as a cache I usually note who the owner is and don’t get over anxious to hunt subsequent caches hidden by them.

Renegade Knights treatise touched a string deep inside me and made me chuckle at his expression of feeling that I have had many times in the last few years. I think it is well-stated. (I too will by him a drink if given the opportunity.) However, I fear he is “whizzing in the wind”. I haven’t had a lot of success in my life getting the masses (or is it “them asses”) to play the game (of life) the way I want them to. The only tool I have is positive reinforcement (I’m an instructional technologist by trade), so I invented the Sluggo’s Ammo Box Grading System. When they get it right, I praise them with a 3 or 4 ammo box score. See my post on THIS cache. When they get it wrong, I give them honest feedback.

I think this topic (thread) has the potential to improve the quality of the caches out there, but I fear that the ones who are reading it are not the ones that need it.

Thanks for listening (reading),

Sluggo

This 'flying saucer' situation is not at all imaginary or seeing too much in some natural phenomena. Something is really flying around. The phenomenon is something real and not visionary or fictitious. - Gen. Nathan Twining Chief of Staff, US Air Force, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff

On Selecting a Finder for your Cache

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