Jump to content

My friend has been stealing


beno988

Recommended Posts

I'd ask a real policeman to talk to him next; that'll scare him, especially since he told you not to report him. He's scared of authority.

 

You really want this kid marked as a snitch by his peers? Do kids not have parents or guardians anymore? I believe our Police are busy enough without having to deal scaring our children straight. <_<

Link to comment

Also I'm going to be taking to him with my advisor about what he's doing. He said to my advisor when she talked to him that he didn't mean any harm but he's said to me himself rules are meant to be broken.

So you did talk to your adivsor and she talked to him? Now that he's starting to receive more official attention, he may stop. He clearly doesn't respect you, but an adult with some authority might get is attention. I'd ask a real policeman to talk to him next; that'll scare him, especially since he told you not to report him. He's scared of authority.

 

You could stop a destructive behavior from escalating into a real crime. Once he gets bored with stealing caches, it's not much of a stretch to move on to smashing mailboxes or other vandalism. Maybe one day he'll thank you for this.

 

I already said I can't report him to the police, do you really expect me to defy my parent?

Link to comment

 

5. If none of the above work (and you said you have already explained why he shouldn't steal them) then beat the piss out of him, or find someone else who will beat the piss out of him for you. If you can't appeal to his empathy or human decency then appeal to his desire not to experience a world of pain.

 

I am going to assume this is not serious advice, since there a no reason to end up with a juvenile record over a plastic container.

 

It has nothing to with what is being stolen and everything to do with the act of malicious stealing. It doesn't matter if he's stealing geocaches or cars. He believes it's okay to steal anything for the lolz. As another poster noted this kid needs to be investigated as a possible sociopath, although he may just be a run-of-the-mill a******.

 

Really? If a homeless man stole one of your happy meals would you chase him down and beat the piss out of him?

 

"There's two kinds of dumb, a guy that gets naked and runs out in the snow and barks at the moon, and a guy who does the same thing in my living room. First one don't matter, the second one you're kinda forced to deal with."

Link to comment

If a homeless man stole one of your happy meals would you chase him down and beat the piss out of him?

 

If a homeless man took off with my food it's probably because he's starving.

 

If a random teenager took off with my food it's probably because he's an a****** and he's doing it for the lolz.

Link to comment
You really want this kid marked as a snitch by his peers? Do kids not have parents or guardians anymore?

 

Ah yes, the timeless classic rational: don't you dare tell someone your friend or family member did something wrong or you're a dirty snitch. No one likes a snitch. Personal loyalty is more important than right and wrong!

 

Reporting a friend to their parents makes someone just as much of a snitch as reporting them to a teacher or cop.

 

You know the best way not to get in trouble? Don't do anything wrong, especially not something illegal.

Edited by Joshism
Link to comment

 

5. If none of the above work (and you said you have already explained why he shouldn't steal them) then beat the piss out of him, or find someone else who will beat the piss out of him for you. If you can't appeal to his empathy or human decency then appeal to his desire not to experience a world of pain.

 

I am going to assume this is not serious advice, since there a no reason to end up with a juvenile record over a plastic container.

 

It has nothing to with what is being stolen and everything to do with the act of malicious stealing. It doesn't matter if he's stealing geocaches or cars. He believes it's okay to steal anything for the lolz. As another poster noted this kid needs to be investigated as a possible sociopath, although he may just be a run-of-the-mill a******.

 

That kind of self help technique is disfavored in any event. Sometimes it is stronger to walk away, take a deep breath, and shrug your shoulders than to "beat the piss" out of someone. Sometimes it is best to tell someone "no" and take a stand for yourself or others. But it's probably always better to avoid being charged with assault or battery.

 

Is your mom afraid of the police?

 

So far we have been told that the person has taken a single cache - which may or may not even be a theft. So I would say that his mom is using good judgment.

 

As others have written, the problem has less to do taking a container than with other factors. I have met my fair share of people are sociopaths (or been diagnosed with ASPD) and know their life stories. I would not presume to offer any opinion about a person based on what we know. That person might might be lots of things. He was first described as a friend. He might be trying to get a reaction for any number of reasons.

 

The advisor at school knows about it. I would hope that the problem will be able to be resolved at that level. It can be hard in a small school. And it might take time. But at this point, working with those around him - and trusting in the support of family - is probably better than to be relying on public forums for either advice or support.

Edited by geodarts
Link to comment

This has been an interesting thread with some good replies. But lately it has taken on an "edge", where I think the comments are going down a harsh route. Let's try and stay helpful and friendly.

 

Also, there has been a proliferation of replacing letters in inappropriate words to get around the forum filter. Please discontinue doing this. Thank you.

 

Here is a quote from the forum guidelines as a reminder:

 

3. Foul language and obscene images will not be tolerated. This site is family-friendly. All forum posts must conform to a family-friendly standard and contributors must act accordingly. It is not appropriate to replace characters in a profane word to elude the built-in censoring filter, or forum moderation.

 

(Bolded by me for emphasis.)

Link to comment

If a homeless man stole one of your happy meals would you chase him down and beat the piss out of him?

 

If a homeless man took off with my food it's probably because he's starving.

 

If a random teenager took off with my food it's probably because he's an a****** and he's doing it for the lolz.

 

What's the difference? Both are guilty of steeling. Difference is your willing to make excuses for the homeless man and persecute the teenager.

 

Did you ever do something stupid when you were young? I know I did.

 

If it was something serious I may be singing a different tune, but a geocache?

Link to comment

If a homeless man stole one of your happy meals would you chase him down and beat the piss out of him?

 

If a homeless man took off with my food it's probably because he's starving.

 

If a random teenager took off with my food it's probably because he's an a****** and he's doing it for the lolz.

 

What's the difference? Both are guilty of steeling. Difference is your willing to make excuses for the homeless man and persecute the teenager.

 

Did you ever do something stupid when you were young? I know I did.

 

If it was something serious I may be singing a different tune, but a geocache?

 

As I said in an earlier post, what is stolen is irrelevant; why is what matters. Otherwise you're saying a scam artist knowingly ripping people off for personal gain is morally equivalent to stealing food so your family doesn't starve, or that shooting someone dead in self defense is morally equivalent to being a serial killer. That's nonsense.

 

I made some poor choices when I was young, but fortunately none of them serious. More importantly none of them were malicious. On many occasions I bore witness to children and teenagers being savage, malicious, self-centered jerks. Those people usually "grow up" to be similar adults. Bad behavior isn't acceptable at any age. But people blow it off with "he's just a kid" or "boys will be boys" and let the behavior continue, allowing it to become normalized. As others have stated in this thread, those who start off stealing geocaches for fun end up stealing things with alot more value unless that behavior is nipped on the bud.

Link to comment

The laws isnt really the CO side. I know there was a case that the law "work", but I think it was because the cop was a friend of a CO or more. But the whole thing scream conflict of interest. If you placed something with no value(many caches dont have any value), how the cops are going to enforce it? You place it where people will steal it. If you have it locked up and they break the lock, that's another story. I placed caches knowing it will disappear but hope it will last two years or so.

 

How are you going to report someone stealing caches that are placed inside guardrail? Its against the law to place caches in guardrail in the first place. Its just that most states dont enforce it. I am not saying that two wrongs make it right but the cop might say... since its not legal to place something on the guardrail in the first place, I cant enforced it. Something to think about.

Link to comment

If a homeless man stole one of your happy meals would you chase him down and beat the piss out of him?

 

If a homeless man took off with my food it's probably because he's starving.

 

If a random teenager took off with my food it's probably because he's an a****** and he's doing it for the lolz.

 

What's the difference? Both are guilty of steeling. Difference is your willing to make excuses for the homeless man and persecute the teenager.

 

Did you ever do something stupid when you were young? I know I did.

 

If it was something serious I may be singing a different tune, but a geocache?

 

As I said in an earlier post, what is stolen is irrelevant; why is what matters. Otherwise you're saying a scam artist knowingly ripping people off for personal gain is morally equivalent to stealing food so your family doesn't starve, or that shooting someone dead in self defense is morally equivalent to being a serial killer. That's nonsense.

 

I made some poor choices when I was young, but fortunately none of them serious. More importantly none of them were malicious. On many occasions I bore witness to children and teenagers being savage, malicious, self-centered jerks. Those people usually "grow up" to be similar adults. Bad behavior isn't acceptable at any age. But people blow it off with "he's just a kid" or "boys will be boys" and let the behavior continue, allowing it to become normalized. As others have stated in this thread, those who start off stealing geocaches for fun end up stealing things with alot more value unless that behavior is nipped on the bud.

 

I'm glad I wasn't branded for life because of my teen transgressions. I think I turned out ok.

 

My question is what do you expect beno988 to do? He's tried to reason with the perpetrator, warned other cachers and spoken to his parents about it.

Link to comment

As I said in an earlier post, what is stolen is irrelevant; why is what matters. Otherwise you're saying a scam artist knowingly ripping people off for personal gain is morally equivalent to stealing food so your family doesn't starve, or that shooting someone dead in self defense is morally equivalent to being a serial killer. That's nonsense.

 

You are blowing things out of all proportion and should stop.

 

You need to remember that you're talking to a minor about a trivial issue - nothing whatsoever to do with life-and-death situations.

Link to comment

So I did talk with the "culprit" briefly at school and he said he put one of the geocaches back, probably the one that had the logbook he held up to my face. I'm going to talk to him with my advisor today, and hopefully he will stop before his behavior goes to far, he's also going to say his part as well so I will let you know his side

Link to comment

So I did talk with the "culprit" briefly at school and he said he put one of the geocaches back, probably the one that had the logbook he held up to my face. I'm going to talk to him with my advisor today, and hopefully he will stop before his behavior goes to far, he's also going to say his part as well so I will let you know his side

 

Why are you making this your business?

Link to comment

So I did talk with the "culprit" briefly at school and he said he put one of the geocaches back, probably the one that had the logbook he held up to my face. I'm going to talk to him with my advisor today, and hopefully he will stop before his behavior goes to far, he's also going to say his part as well so I will let you know his side

 

Why are you making this your business?

I think he feels bad that he was the one that introduced geocaching to someone who had other motives and he wants to rectify it. I applaud him for what he did even that it appears it was out of his comfort zone. Geocaching could use more members like beno988.

Edited by TahoeJoe
Link to comment

So I did talk with the "culprit" briefly at school and he said he put one of the geocaches back, probably the one that had the logbook he held up to my face. I'm going to talk to him with my advisor today, and hopefully he will stop before his behavior goes to far, he's also going to say his part as well so I will let you know his side

 

Why are you making this your business?

I think he feels bad that he was the one that introduced geocaching to someone who had other motives and he wants to rectify it. I applaud him for what he did even that it appears it was out of his comfort zone. Geocaching could use more members like beno988.

 

Thanks for your answer, but my question was directed at the OP. :)

Link to comment

So I did talk with the "culprit" briefly at school and he said he put one of the geocaches back, probably the one that had the logbook he held up to my face. I'm going to talk to him with my advisor today, and hopefully he will stop before his behavior goes to far, he's also going to say his part as well so I will let you know his side

 

Why are you making this your business?

I think he feels bad that he was the one that introduced geocaching to someone who had other motives and he wants to rectify it. I applaud him for what he did even that it appears it was out of his comfort zone. Geocaching could use more members like beno988.

 

Thanks for your answer, but my question was directed at the OP. :)

 

I am the OP

Link to comment

So I did talk with the "culprit" briefly at school and he said he put one of the geocaches back, probably the one that had the logbook he held up to my face. I'm going to talk to him with my advisor today, and hopefully he will stop before his behavior goes to far, he's also going to say his part as well so I will let you know his side

 

Why are you making this your business?

I think he feels bad that he was the one that introduced geocaching to someone who had other motives and he wants to rectify it. I applaud him for what he did even that it appears it was out of his comfort zone. Geocaching could use more members like beno988.

 

Thanks for your answer, but my question was directed at the OP. :)

 

I am the OP

 

Yes you are. :)

Link to comment

So I did talk with the "culprit" briefly at school and he said he put one of the geocaches back, probably the one that had the logbook he held up to my face. I'm going to talk to him with my advisor today, and hopefully he will stop before his behavior goes to far, he's also going to say his part as well so I will let you know his side

 

Why are you making this your business?

I think he feels bad that he was the one that introduced geocaching to someone who had other motives and he wants to rectify it. I applaud him for what he did even that it appears it was out of his comfort zone. Geocaching could use more members like beno988.

 

Thanks for your answer, but my question was directed at the OP. :)

 

I am the OP

 

Yes you are. :)

 

So you want me to answer… well TahoeJoe's reply sums up

What I think pretty much

Link to comment

So you want me to answer… well TahoeJoe's reply sums up

What I think pretty much

 

Yet you have made it a point to keep dragging this alleged cache thief in front of you school advisor just to cause him problems because he is jerking you around over geocaching.

 

I was reading when you posted that geocaches are just litter, and how you seem so concerned that the "culprit" needs help and so on.

 

You know, my friend thinks you are just trolling the forums, but I believe you. :ph34r:

 

If this other kid is bulling you, it won't stop as long as you are giving him attention. Take your mothers advice. :)

Link to comment

So you want me to answer… well TahoeJoe's reply sums up

What I think pretty much

Yet you have made it a point to keep dragging this alleged cache thief in front of you school advisor just to cause him problems because he is jerking you around over geocaching.

That's one way of looking at it. However, the way most of us seem to be looking at it, and I believe the way the OP sees it, is that they're acting as a concerned member of the geocaching community due to malicious actions being taken against other peoples' caches.

 

Personally, I applaud beno988 for having the courage to speak up. Some people would say "hey, if my caches aren't affected, why should I care?", but instead they've shown that they do care about how this "friend's" actions can affect others. We need more members of the geocaching community like this.

Link to comment

However, the way most of us seem to be looking at it, and I believe the way the OP sees it, is that they're acting as a concerned member of the geocaching community due to malicious actions being taken against other peoples' caches.

 

At the beginning I would have agreed, but some of the OP's comments changed my mind. Right now, I'm only seeing one side and no proof of cache theft, and it was replaced according to the OP by the "culprit" that allegedly stole it. :unsure:

 

No disrespect intended to the OP, but as a parent of teenagers I'm just not buying it anymore. I would need more proof now because of some comments that they made. The part about geocaches being litter was the turning point. :(

Link to comment

Right now, I'm only seeing one side and no proof of cache theft...

 

So I think I will report him to Groundspeak now, as he brought a logbook from a geocache to school with him and his friend held it up in front of my face making me extremely angry.

Unless by "proof" you actually mean photos of the "culprit" holding a stolen cache while standing in school holding today's newspaper, which I doubt you're going to get...

 

Personally, I see no evidence of trolling here. If you don't believe the OP, feel free to bow out from this discussion.

Link to comment

Right now, I'm only seeing one side and no proof of cache theft...

 

So I think I will report him to Groundspeak now, as he brought a logbook from a geocache to school with him and his friend held it up in front of my face making me extremely angry.

Unless by "proof" you actually mean photos of the "culprit" holding a stolen cache while standing in school holding today's newspaper, which I doubt you're going to get...

 

Personally, I see no evidence of trolling here. If you don't believe the OP, feel free to bow out from this discussion.

 

You are not running me off, but earned a spot on my ignore list. <_<

Link to comment

So I talked to my classmate and he said that he never had the intention of keeping the geocaches he took and that he was only taking them to show my classmates what they where then he would put them back, he now understands how serious this is and won't take anymore.

Link to comment

So I talked to my classmate and he said that he never had the intention of keeping the geocaches he took and that he was only taking them to show my classmates what they where then he would put them back, he now understands how serious this is and won't take anymore.

 

I'm glad it has all worked out well and you educated a Muggle about Geocaching. Sure, cache theft strikes a nerve here in the forums. :D

Link to comment

We had some young cachers stealing in our area. I am guessing they got bored cause it stopped.

 

But I have had some fake bolts, and fake rocks stolen recently. Hidden in a way only a cacher would be looking. So I know it's not a muggle.

 

As for cache theft, locally we don't have much of a problem. But we do have a Muggle problem at one park where someone was placing nasty stuff in the container, so that cache got archived.

 

One problem that we do have is some kid that goes around and picks up TB's and keeps them. Right now there are 17 TB's in their account and growing. :(

Link to comment

As someone who has several caches in the Santa Cruz area, this makes me very concerned. I spend quite a bit of time and money on my hides and I'd hate for them to be maliciously stolen. Maybe it's time to make all my caches premium.

Link to comment

As someone who has several caches in the Santa Cruz area, this makes me very concerned. I spend quite a bit of time and money on my hides and I'd hate for them to be maliciously stolen. Maybe it's time to make all my caches premium.

 

I would assume if you spent a lot of money on them then it's almost necessary that they are premium

Link to comment

We had some young cachers stealing in our area. I am guessing they got bored cause it stopped.

 

But I have had some fake bolts, and fake rocks stolen recently. Hidden in a way only a cacher would be looking. So I know it's not a muggle.

 

As for cache theft, locally we don't have much of a problem. But we do have a Muggle problem at one park where someone was placing nasty stuff in the container, so that cache got archived.

 

One problem that we do have is some kid that goes around and picks up TB's and keeps them. Right now there are 17 TB's in their account and growing. :(

 

Has anyone emailed him and explained how TBs work?

Link to comment

We had some young cachers stealing in our area. I am guessing they got bored cause it stopped.

 

But I have had some fake bolts, and fake rocks stolen recently. Hidden in a way only a cacher would be looking. So I know it's not a muggle.

 

As for cache theft, locally we don't have much of a problem. But we do have a Muggle problem at one park where someone was placing nasty stuff in the container, so that cache got archived.

 

One problem that we do have is some kid that goes around and picks up TB's and keeps them. Right now there are 17 TB's in their account and growing. :(

 

Has anyone emailed him and explained how TBs work?

 

I don't think so, but I'm sure they know what they are doing. But as for me contacting another geocacher with unwanted advice, I would not feel comfortable doing so, and I am a cache owner that don't want to take chances upsetting them. There are muggles in this game, my ammo cans may be next. :anibad:

Link to comment

I'm a bit late to the party, but here goes. According to the OP:

The only geocache I know that he has stolen is soquel's lighten up #8 on the cabbrillo campus

 

If only 1 geocache has been stolen, there's no problem and it's definitely not worth making a big deal out of it or giving them any attention. It just would encourage more stealing. I agree with the advice on this thread just to shrug it off. And, no, stealing 1 geocache does not necessarily make someone a sociopath. Teenagers do stuff. The only time I would do anything is if the person was showing other signs they needed helped/intervention or if the stealing was persistent.

 

I had a local kid/teen here mess with 1 of my caches. First, they drew a picture of the male anatomy on the container. Then they stole the logbook. They actually emailed me about it. I pretty much told them not to worry, that stuff like this happens all the time and we expect caches to need maintenance/go missing etc. Never had any problems with them again.

Link to comment

My daughter PinkNinja is in that area. She has solved this problem once before from a kid who was peeing in everyones caches. Her Idea actually stopped him. PM me some caches you know have been tampered with and I will see if she can come up with any ideas.

 

The only geocache I know that he has stolen is soquel's lighten up #8 on the cabbrillo campus

I checked on that cache today and it had already been replaced and is in good shape!

Link to comment

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
×
×
  • Create New...