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Have you had an accident recently?


drsolly

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... said the voice on the phone. I was busy reading the Inspector Gadget blog http://inspectorgadget.wordpress.com so without really thinking, I said "Yes". "And were you injured as a result?" "Yes," I replied, thinking, I'll just say yes to all his questions until he gets tired of it. "What was the accident," he asked.

 

At that point, I decided to give him at bit more than 1% of my attention. "I was bitten by a dog."

 

He hung up on me.

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... said the voice on the phone. I was busy reading the Inspector Gadget blog http://inspectorgadget.wordpress.com so without really thinking, I said "Yes". "And were you injured as a result?" "Yes," I replied, thinking, I'll just say yes to all his questions until he gets tired of it. "What was the accident," he asked.

 

At that point, I decided to give him at bit more than 1% of my attention. "I was bitten by a dog."

 

He hung up on me.

lol i cant stand these calls we get a lot of them if im in the mood ill waste there time for a bit

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Sign up to the Telephone Preference Service http://www.mpsonline.org.uk/tps/index.html This will greatly reduce the number of calls you will get.

 

If someone does ring tell them you are signed up and ask they remove you from their records, it does work. Bar one company we kept getting calls from a company who was not but claimed to be Sky. After a few calls I got fed up, raised it with the TPS who told me that the calls should cease from a certain date and now silence, although I do pick the phone up from time to time to make sure it is still working.:laughing:

 

In regards to the text messages the sender should provide an opt out option, either opt out or ignore them.

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Sign up to the Telephone Preference Service

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In regards to the text messages the sender should provide an opt out option, either opt out or ignore them.

 

Another vote for the TPS, the number of spurious calls seriously dropped after we signed up.

 

As for texts, that's never really been a problem for me but wasn't there a scam whereby companies were sending sms texts with an option to reply to opt out, but the opt out reply went to a premium rate SMS service which then cost you a bucket load of money.

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At that point, I decided to give him at bit more than 1% of my attention. "I was bitten by a dog."

 

He hung up on me.

 

I wonder if he might have been encouraged to hang on the line longer if you had said "I fell off my bike."

 

I was actually quite surprised. If I'm bitten by a dog, there's actually a potential claim for damages against the dog owner, and lots of dosh for the lawyer to roll in. Falling off my bike because I stupidly put the wheel on the wrong way round, the person to blame is myself, and not even Homer Simpson is going to be persuaded to sue himself.

 

Another member of the public was introduced to the concept of counting slugs today. He asked me what I was doing, and wouldn't take "Good afternoon" and a nice smile as an answer, so now he knows.

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Well no, but after my sister-in-law had a minor prang last year, my niece and nephew were contacted the next day by someone offering to represent them in suing their mother!

 

Only in America...

 

And TPS Service hasn't stopped the wretches from haranguing me on a daily basis with the allegedly virus-written computer on which I am typing this post. Because they are offshore, they're untouchable.

 

:mad:

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And TPS Service hasn't stopped the wretches from haranguing me on a daily basis with the allegedly virus-written computer on which I am typing this post. Because they are offshore, they're untouchable.

 

:mad:

 

Oh, those guys can be great fun. I got a call from one, and I was waiting for ladysolly to get herself ready to go out, so I answered the phone, and we spent the next five minutes with them talking me through doing stuff on my computer, and me pretending to have a computer in front of me and doing it, until we reached the final stage ... and I'll let you devise your own punchline.

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Well no, but after my sister-in-law had a minor prang last year, my niece and nephew were contacted the next day by someone offering to represent them in suing their mother!

 

Only in America...

 

And TPS Service hasn't stopped the wretches from haranguing me on a daily basis with the allegedly virus-written computer on which I am typing this post. Because they are offshore, they're untouchable.

 

:mad:

 

I've taken to wasting their time when they call. The most recent guy to call wasn't willing to deal with my endless rabbit trails and muddling metaphor and reality. The previous guy took nearly 20 minutes before he realised he wasn't going anywhere, with a conversation something like this:

 

Him: Your computer might have downloaded a virus or spyware

Me: A virus? You mean my computer has a cold?

Him: Something like that

Me: Should I put waterproof sheets down, in case it sneezes on the carpet or something? That would make a mess

Him: It's not a cold

Me: But you just said it was a cold

Him: It's like a cold. Your files and folders have a virus

Me: My folders have a cold? I just checked in the drawer and none of my folders are sneezing. Are you sure?

 

Then he moved onto spyware...

 

Him: Never mind the virus, you could have spyware

Me: Spyware? You mean like MI5, or James Bond

Him: That sort of thing. You'll have to check...

Me: I just looked around the room, there's nobody here except me. No spies anywhere. Not even behind the door.

Him: It won't be in the room

Me: I know it's not in the room, I just checked...

Him: I need you to check...

Me: Do you mean someone is spying on my wife?

Him: No, not like that

Me: You've got me worried now, let me check that the curtains are closed. Do you think my neighbour has a telescope or something?

Him: No, it's in your computer

Me: James Bond is in my computer? How did he do that? There's not much space in there. It is James Bond's really small child hiding in there? How did he get in there?

Him: It's not like that

Me: But you said James Bond was spying on me. Does James Bond have a cold?

 

... and later he needed me to sit at my computer, which created its own difficulties ...

 

Him: So I need you to go to your computer and turn it on

Me: That's going to be difficult for me, the phone won't reach

Him: Your phone won't reach the computer?

Me: No, the cable is only 10 feet long and the computer is at the library half a mile away. The cable won't reach.

Him: So I need you to go to your computer

Me: I'd have to hang up and go to the library

Him: Shall I call you back another time?

Me: You could but if I'm here I can't reach the computer and if I'm at the library I can't answer the phone

Him: Oh, when shall I call you back?

Me: You could send me a long extension cable. It would have to be tough because I have to cross the road and wouldn't want it to break if someone drove over it

Him: Shall I call you at the library?

Me: Is James Bond hiding in the library?

Him: Something like that

Me: If you send me a long lead they might let me use the phone at the library. I'd have to keep my voice down, they like people to be quiet in the library.

Him: OK

Me: It could be a problem, if I'm whispering on the phone on a long lead at the library they might think I'm James Bond and throw me out. Then what would we do?

 

and so on... until after 20 minutes he asked for the phone number for the library. I might have accidentally given him the number for the police station by mistake.

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It's not often I literally laugh out loud at a post, but that's brilliant!

 

We're talking about it on another forum too, but it's not as amusing as your James Bondery. I did yesterday tell "Robin" that I couldn't possibly turn on my computer if it had a virus - I was just going to throw it away because it was too dangerous. Having not got too far with that, I asked him for his phone number to call him back as I was very busy just now, etc. That floored him for a while.

 

It's quite a fun game one can play, but I like the library angle.

 

:lol:

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I have been known to have a bit of fum as well.

 

Adopting a Cockney accent I try to sell them my car. I just won't take no for an answer and get very upset when they are not interested.

 

I do also claim to be from a religous sect that has no use for gas / electricity / mobile phones / solar panels etc and this can keep them on the phone for a while.

 

The way I see it is that all the time they are talking to me they are not bothering anyone else!

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