Beware when Geocaching...

August 2, 2011

Went out geocaching this morning with my twin sons (ten years old).

Anyway we were walking through this field trying to get the second of eight caches on our plan. My Blackberry doesn't have GPS and I don't have a receiver either so just make notes in a book and find the caches from there.

Oldest twin found a cache under a horse trough and we logged it and moved on. Then went to the next one but no luck. As we were returning back up the hill, two women walking four dogs came down. The first woman stopped and stared at me intently, eye contact but a little too "starey". She then said "I saw what you were doing. Boys (addressing them), if he's been touching you, you must tell an adult right away."

I was gobsmacked, couldn't get my words out even. This woman was accusing me of sexually abusing the boys alongside me. I tried explaining and showing her the book I had with all the careful, detailed plans I had laid out but she didn't want to know at all. She continued "You were looking all around back there really suspiciously"; well, the whole point of finding a cache is that no-one sees you find it, especially non-cachers who could then take the cache ruining it for everyone else.

I followed her round the field protesting my innocence but she just kept saying that if the kids had nothing to tell, they wouldn't say anything and if they did, then they would tell an adult. I just couldn't believe that a grown woman in her fifties thought that this was the correct way of doing things. The other woman said nothing through the exchanges which was weird enough but all she kept saying was "Rubbish - I don't believe you" and "You're a weirdo!".

She had arrived at the field at the same time I had so I knew which car was hers when I returned to my car. I left a message on her car windscreen (not sure why but made me feel better) explaining that I was leaving my number so that she could ring up and apologise for her outburst and also say sorry to the kids who were upset at her comments.

I just don't get some people. Not sure if I can do anything or not but I feel so frustrated that she can get away with something like this.

No real idea why I posted this except to warn you that not everyone is as comfortable with others walking around the deserted countryside hiding and "sneaking" about. Mind you, I don't understand where this mad woman was coming from anyhow so maybe she needs help.

1.2k · August 2, 2011

What a strange encounter! I see parents out playing with their kids and I don't think twice!

3k · August 3, 2011

Someone had an unfortunate experience like this several months ago and posted about it here: caching father caching at a park with their daughter got the cops called on him by an older couple who saw them and were concerned he was a child abductor or something.

It's nice for strangers to show concern for the safety of children, but it's another to jump to conclusions and outright accuse someone like that especially on such flimsy grounds.

August 3, 2011

My god people must be looking in horror at me, I let my little boy (3 years) run about open fields whilst i stroll about behind him then all of a sudden ill sprint over to him grab him by the waist and run away with him.....he loves it....think i better get an explination ready just incase people think im stealing my own child....(plus me and his dad have brown hair and he has blonde :unsure: ) (abit of mattison family history, every single one of us were blonde untill we reached 7 years old)

child snatching my own child lol :blink:

August 3, 2011

Blimey Smart Mart what a horrible thing to happen. Bet she never got in touch to apologise.

August 3, 2011

That is an awful thing to have happen, but as difficult as it could be I would be inclined to say think no more about it. If she/they were really convinced about what they had seen, they would have contacted the police regardless. Instead they choose to jump to conclusions and likely saw your protestations as "proof" of their warped suspicions.

However... You say you saw their car parked up? Did you get the registration? If you feel strongly enough about this perhaps you should approach the police yourself and report this distasteful incident if it has caused so much distress to you and your children?

As commendable as it is that people might think they are looking out for the safety of kids, this is completely the wrong way to go about it and they cannot simply walk around making this sort of malicious accusation. Not only is it hurtful, but it surely has the potential to cause tremendous psychological damage and destroy reputations. These people need educating about the right way to do things without starting a witch hunt.

August 3, 2011

"(1)A person is guilty of an offence if, with intent to cause a person harassment, alarm or distress, he—

(a)uses threatening, abusive or insulting words or behaviour, or disorderly behaviour, or

(b)displays any writing, sign or other visible representation which is threatening, abusive or insulting,

thereby causing that or another person harassment, alarm or distress."

Public Order Act 1986

If their behaviour caused you alarm or distress, and it rightly appears to have done, you would appear to have the option to ask the constabulary to have a quiet word with them.

On the other hand it may be better to treat them as isolated nutters and forget about it!

August 3, 2011

...
If their behaviour caused you alarm or distress, and it rightly appears to have done, you would appear to have the option to ask the constabulary to have a quiet word with them.

On the other hand it may be better to treat them as isolated nutters and forget about it!

Yes, I'd be torn between these options too. I'd have made a note of their registration, and thought about it for a while first before deciding. I'd have avoided handing out my phone number though.

1.1k · August 3, 2011

She continued "You were looking all around back there really suspiciously";

I've had it suggested to me that I've been acting suspiciously. Here's one I had recently.

"You've been acting suspiciously"

"No, I haven't".

A bit of a pause there, he hadn't expected me to disagree.

"You were in that patch of woodland, you were acting suspiciously"

"Yes, I was in that patch of woodland, but I wasn't acting suspiciously"

Another pause. The thing is, what defines "suspiciously"? And what is he suspecting that I'm doing that's wrong?

"Well, I think you were acting suspiciously"

"And I think you're mistaken. But anyway, what are you supposed to do when you see someone acting suspiciously, in your opinion, even though you're mistaken?"

"Call the police"

"OK, then do what you think you ought to do"

And he got his mobile out. And I said, "Here's my offer. If you call the police, I'm willing to wait here until they come, provided you also wait here, so that you can tell them exactly what it was you suspected that I was doing. But I'm only willing to stand here waiting for one hour, then I'm leaving."

And he thought about that, and put his phone away. And said "You were acting suspiciously".

And I just walked away.

The problem is, people are told to "report anything suspicious to the police", but no-one ever tells you what "suspicious" is supposed to mean, and many people confuse "suspicious" with "unusual".

August 3, 2011

Thanks for all your replies.

I must admit that I was fired up when I got back to the car and was all up for ringing the police but as the week has gone on, the need to do something has diminished somewhat. I have got her registration number written down but obviously the longer I leave it, the less the police will probably want to do with it.

ETA To add, we only got five out of nine caches that day and part of me is tempted to go back there this Sunday morning, to see if she's there and still as aggressive as before. The other part says there are a million other caches around the world, go and look for them somewhere else.

Edited August 3, 2011 by Smart Mart

9.2k · August 3, 2011

ETA To add, we only got five out of nine caches that day and part of me is tempted to go back there this Sunday morning, to see if she's there and still as aggressive as before. The other part says there are a million other caches around the world, go and look for them somewhere else.

Just a thought.

Would someone who was being/ doing 'suspicious' return to that place again, knowing that she was likely to be around?

If she is, and tries again, follow Dr Solly's ploy.

Edited August 3, 2011 by Bear and Ragged

August 3, 2011

ETA To add, we only got five out of nine caches that day and part of me is tempted to go back there this Sunday morning, to see if she's there and still as aggressive as before. The other part says there are a million other caches around the world, go and look for them somewhere else.

Could you take your wife/girlfriend/lover/all of the above with you and ask her to have a quiet word[*] with them if you meet?

[*] "Quiet word" in this context involves a sock with a brick in it.

Edited August 3, 2011 by The Patrician

3.3k · August 3, 2011

The daft thing about all this "suspicious" idea is that there's no law against studying a fallen log in as much detail as you want. A lot of the time people seem to think they have to justify what they are doing to anyone who asks them, and provide some kind of diversionary explanation that they were "just tying their shoes" or "just enjoying the view" or whatever. If someone wants to take an aggressive stance and demand "what are you doing?" then unless they are a police officer or similar figure the answer "minding my own business" is just as valid as any other.

August 4, 2011

That response would have been perfect had she not come up and said "I saw what you were doing" which, by what she then asked my boys, she most certainly didn't know!! :angry:

Erring towards driving past the car park on Sunday and seeing if she is there then caching in the area. If not, just move on and continue doing this fascinating hobby.

August 4, 2011

"(1)A person is guilty of an offence if, with intent to cause a person harassment, alarm or distress, he—

(a)uses threatening, abusive or insulting words or behaviour, or disorderly behaviour, or

(b)displays any writing, sign or other visible representation which is threatening, abusive or insulting,

thereby causing that or another person harassment, alarm or distress."

Public Order Act 1986

If their behaviour caused you alarm or distress, and it rightly appears to have done, you would appear to have the option to ask the constabulary to have a quiet word with them.

On the other hand it may be better to treat them as isolated nutters and forget about it!

Neil,

Whilst I sympathise with your suggestion most officers would not give deal with this as a section 5 incident. I have no doubt that the person was caused unnecessary alarm and distress but its not going to happen.

August 4, 2011

What a barmy world we live in. This wouldn't have happened 10 years ago.

August 4, 2011

Neil,

Whilst I sympathise with your suggestion most officers would not give deal with this as a section 5 incident. I have no doubt that the person was caused unnecessary alarm and distress but its not going to happen.

I suspect you're right!

August 4, 2011

What a barmy world we live in. This wouldn't have happened 10 years ago.

Yeh but 10 years ago we would be concered about our neighbours.....Alarms going off wed be straight out checking the house was ok.......now you just get annoyed with the constant drown that their alarm is making!

Ohhh how times have changed... :unsure: (comming from a 24 year old )

August 5, 2011

Last month me and my partner got stopped in a field by 2 non uniformed police officers who had been following us around an industrial estate thinking we were a) hooligans going to a field for a rave later or c)dropping drugs off..

We had to explain what caching was and show them the GPS..

It seemed funny when you get in the car but then the shock sinks in that we could have been arrested for a harmless hobby if they hadn't have believed us! :S

Edited August 5, 2011 by Cattawall

1.1k · August 5, 2011

Last month me and my partner got stopped in a field by 2 non uniformed police officers who had been following us around an industrial estate thinking we were a) hooligans going to a field for a rave later or c)dropping drugs off..

We had to explain what caching was and show them the GPS..

It seemed funny when you get in the car but then the shock sinks in that we could have been arrested for a harmless hobby if they hadn't have believed us! :S

I'm not bothered about being stopped by the police, that's happened several times to me. They're doing their job, they're entitled to ask me what I'm doing, and as soon as I explain, they're happy. I'll even be courteous to people who dress up like, but aren't, police.

And I don't mind muggles who ask me nicely what I'm doing; I explain "Geocaching, it's a sort of treasure hunt" and go into more detail if they show more interent.

What annoys me, is muggles who think I'm acting "suspiciously", and challenge me, but then can't say what it is they suspect.

In another incident, a muggle asked me for my name and address. I said I'd give him mine, if he gave me his, because although he thought I was acting suspiciously, I thought he was acting suspiciously. He didn't ask me why I thought he was acting suspiciously. The thing is, since there's no agreed algorithm for determining "acting suspiciously", my opinion was as good as his. And he backed off on the name and address request.

Oh, and the answer to "Can I help you?" meaning "What the heck are you doing?" is always "No thanks, I'm fine" meaning "Go away".

August 5, 2011

Oh, and the answer to "Can I help you?" meaning "What the heck are you doing?" is always "No thanks, I'm fine" meaning "Go away".

And the other side of the coin...

I met a muggle at a cache today. I'd just found the cache and still had it in my hand when he appeared from nowhere.

Muggle: "Ah, you've got one of those cache things."

Me: "Yes, have you heard of it?"

Muggle: "Yes, I've got one in my garden."

Me, somewhat taken aback: "Did you know about it?"

Muggle: Not until I found it. It moves about a bit and I put it back in the right place. I often watch people with their phone things."

Me: "Well ,thank you for being so understanding."

I showed him my map and he pointed out the cache in his garden. I'd logged it an hour earlier. I thanked him again and we both then went on with our respective walks.

The caches? I met him at ch071 - Chiltern Hundred, Huge Farm. The cache in his garden is ch067 - Chiltern Hundred, Two Gates Lane. :lol:

August 6, 2011

As I am often out geocaching with my 2 boys (age 8 and 11) I fully sympathise with the original post, I know I would have been incredibly upset by such an accusation.

However as a bit of an aside, I was recently caching alone and hunting for a cache which I knew was particularly well hidden. The GZ was slightly overlooked by an earth mound with a slide on it in an adjacent play area but as no muggles were in sight I proceeded with my search. There seemed a very obvious hole in the hedge where previous searchers had clearly been looking and as I squeezed in on all fours I heard those terrifying words... 'Mummy, Mummy whats that man doing in that hedge'. (answers on a postcard). I am not sure how quickly Mummy got to the top of the mound but when she did she would have only seen the distant shape of my car disappearing over the horizon.

August 6, 2011

Heres a funny one...... Dad went to locate a cache (http://coord.info/GC1WW50) and its in a place in our village thats well known for the strange men...ahem getting together on the quiet n theres a few bushes i hope you all get the idea!!! :huh:

Well daddy dearest went to go snoop for the cache, he noticed a man looking at him strangly in the car, well because of the whole weatherby thing over there way dad decided to KNOCK on the window and explain what he was up to.....Not a good idea razer at all lol......anyhoo he went to GZ and got excited that hed found the cache, he knocked on the window AGAIN and told him hed found it and showed him the log ect then he explained that he now had abit of a walk to the next cache.....well the icing on the cake the man in the car replied with " If you want we could go for a little detour to your next cache!!!!!" and then WINKED at him I could not stop howling with laughter when he told me!!!.............Just make sure if you ever visit that cache you dont do it as a night cache :blink:

August 6, 2011

drsolly you need to write a book on all the answers to give, ill be waiting to pre order

1.4k · August 6, 2011

Heres a funny one...... Dad went to locate a cache (http://coord.info/GC1WW50) and its in a place in our village thats well known for the strange men...ahem getting together on the quiet n theres a few bushes i hope you all get the idea!!!

Well daddy dearest went to go snoop for the cache, he noticed a man looking at him strangly in the car, well because of the whole weatherby thing over there way dad decided to KNOCK on the window and explain what he was up to.....Not a good idea razer at all lol......anyhoo he went to GZ and got excited that hed found the cache, he knocked on the window AGAIN and told him hed found it and showed him the log ect then he explained that he now had abit of a walk to the next cache.....well the icing on the cake the man in the car replied with " If you want we could go for a little detour to your next cache!!!!!" and then WINKED at him I could not stop howling with laughter when he told me!!!.............Just make sure if you ever visit that cache you dont do it as a night cache

Thanks, I need to clean the coffee off my laptop screen now! :laughing:

1.1k · August 6, 2011

drsolly you need to write a book on all the answers to give, ill be waiting to pre order

Caching is a game for having fun. Muggles can sometimes, unwittingly, become part of the fun. But I also encounter remarkably helpful muggles, such as the guy who, well, here's what happened.

I had a puncture on the bike. I carry a puncture repair kit, but I couldn't find the leak. So I wheeled the bike to the nearest habitation, and knocked on the door, and asked for a bowl of water, explaining the problem.

He gave me a bowl of water, and a cup of tea, and when I found I had two holes, then four, he found where the thorn was inside the tyre, and gave me a new inner tube! And wouldn't take money. My faith in humanity is strengthened.

1.1k · August 6, 2011

drsolly you need to write a book on all the answers to give, ill be waiting to pre order

Oh, and here's one for when you get an agressive dog, barking and showing teeth, and rushing at you, and jumping at you, and the owner doesn't bother to control the dog, but thinks that saying "Don't worry, he's harmless" is good enough.

I say "It's not him I'm worried about, it's me. I have this uncontrollable instinct to defend myself, and I'm concerned that I might kick your dog in its head. I can't help it, it's an instinct. So please, help me deal with this instinct by controlling your dog."

1.4k · August 6, 2011

drsolly you need to write a book on all the answers to give, ill be waiting to pre order

Oh, and here's one for when you get an agressive dog, barking and showing teeth, and rushing at you, and jumping at you, and the owner doesn't bother to control the dog, but thinks that saying "Don't worry, he's harmless" is good enough.

I say "It's not him I'm worried about, it's me. I have this uncontrollable instinct to defend myself, and I'm concerned that I might kick your dog in its head. I can't help it, it's an instinct. So please, help me deal with this instinct by controlling your dog."

Oops, sorry, I was going to respond and decided against it and ended up leaving just the quotations.

My comment was just about having met dogs (the snarling, jumping up at the throat kind) without their owners (on their land- in fact in both cases, they let their dogs out and went back indoors!) It all comes down to common sense though, and I will try to remember to take my stick out even if my knees are not complaining. In both cases I retreated and was not harmed, though was very shaken the first time.

Edited August 7, 2011 by Fianccetto

August 8, 2011

I say "It's not him I'm worried about, it's me. I have this uncontrollable instinct to defend myself, and I'm concerned that I might kick your dog in its head. I can't help it, it's an instinct. So please, help me deal with this instinct by controlling your dog."

Love it :lol:

August 8, 2011

Well done on not swearing at the woman. You were mortified at the suggestion you were some sort of paedo; I think I'd have been bloody livid.

1.4k · August 8, 2011

Well done on not swearing at the woman. You were mortified at the suggestion you were some sort of paedo; I think I'd have been bloody livid.

Same here.

1.1k · August 9, 2011

Well done on not swearing at the woman. You were mortified at the suggestion you were some sort of paedo; I think I'd have been bloody livid.

Same here.

Maybe such people should be told about their filthy minds and how appalling it is that they're unable to suppress their disgusting ideas. Swearing isn't necessary, but certainly emphatic language should be used. She should have been told how offensive she is.

1.4k · August 9, 2011

Well quite. My first reaction was that I would laugh at her, and I thought most men I knew probably would too, it is just too rediculous, but I am not sure what I would do, she probably wouldn't have said anything to a woman, but if the accusation had been levelled at me...I might have asked her if she were feeling alright, as I know ill people who used to behave a bit like that.

About a century ago (I think) wild places were feared, many people believed in all kinds of creatures like goblins or elves and didn't consider the woods good places to spend leisure time, people out in the woods or fields who didn't work there were regarded suspiciously. Some people seem to have hung onto the fear, perhaps they were told as a child to keep out of those fields or the bogeyman will get you, and anyone they find must be the bogeyman. But most would keep it to themselves, as they know its odd, and know making accusations is wrong. So on reflection, I think she was ill.

August 9, 2011

If it had just been me and my son....or my dad an my boy id of smashed her in the face!!!! In this day an age its seen that if your walking through the woods with your child or your grandchild you clearly must be a kiddy abuser because the child in question is out in the fresh air, walking and learning new things whereas most kids today are constantly on their xbox's or ps3 at the age of 5 living their indoor life playing 18+ games and talking to strangers over their games consols.....bet shes not bothered about that though as there inside with her!!!

1.4k · August 9, 2011

If it had just been me and my son....or my dad an my boy id of smashed her in the face!!!! In this day an age its seen that if your walking through the woods with your child or your grandchild you clearly must be a kiddy abuser because the child in question is out in the fresh air, walking and learning new things whereas most kids today are constantly on their xbox's or ps3 at the age of 5 living their indoor life playing 18+ games and talking to strangers over their games consols.....bet shes not bothered about that though as there inside with her!!!

Nah, she's been watching too many back-to-back Midsommer's Murders, Frost and Bergerac (sorry John Nettles, you cropped up twice there) and has lost touch with reality. Hitting her would just confirm for her that her version of reality is accurate.

Mind you, the news from London these days suggests that is how far too many people would react (with violoence).

Edited August 9, 2011 by Fianccetto

1.1k · August 9, 2011

Please take this with tongue in cheek. I would tell her to take her tablets and wait for the soothing effect to set in. I have said this many a time to a co-worker. she can really drive you mad.

1.1k · August 9, 2011

Or how about "I teach my children not to talk to strangers. You're a stranger. Please go away."

August 10, 2011

Or how about "I teach my children not to talk to strangers. You're a stranger. Please go away."

Or " Unless you stop harassing me I'm going to call the police and you can explain your ridiculous accusations to them".

August 10, 2011

I'd put what I'd say, but this is a family forum. >.< It's infuriating how stupid and quick to assume some people are.

August 10, 2011

hahaha we went to the bolton wanderers family fun day on sunday and we were meeting the players and a couple of them were saying hello to aaron and his soooo cute reply was "im not supposed to speak to strangers" was genuis lol

Beware when Geocaching...

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