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we need a dating site for geocachers

dorqie

By dorqie
in General geocaching topics

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dorqie

+dorqie

Posted
Posted

My last relationship, although admittedly doomed to fail on many levels, was hard to manage because we did not share any hobbies.

He hated geocaching (among other outdoor activities) and we were rarely able to have fun together because we couldn't agree on fun activities.

 

My present relationship, only formed because of geocaching. Wouldn't have met him otherwise.

 

I was talking with my girlfriends about whether or not each of us would be willing to make a relationship work if there were no common hobbies, and I realized that it would be a dealbreaker for me if my partner didn't cache.

 

How does caching factor in to your dating endeavors?

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dorqie

+dorqie

Posted
  • Author
Posted

I thought about putting it in OT, but i've posted geocaching related things there before that got moved back here. And it's not organized caching, it's a general question for everyone, I'm not organizing anything, I'm just asking how important geocaching is to the forum members.

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SeekerOfTheWay

+SeekerOfTheWay

Posted
Posted (edited)

My husband doesn't cache and I don't mind. I actually prefer it because I enjoy caching alone. I'd find it bothersome if he always wanted to go with me. I have caching buddies in my area, some that are snow birds, and some in other areas. So if I want to cache with someone, I just give them a ring.

 

Having similar hobbies isn't important to me. I can't imagine being married to a geocaching atheist vegan who does yoga. That sounds obnoxious! :P

Edited by SeekerOfTheWay
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briansnat

+briansnat

Posted
Posted

Its not important that my spouse (or my GF before I was married) share all of my interests. In fact I think it's healthy to have some things that you each enjoy separately. Of course it's not good to have nothing in common, but it wouldn't matter to me if my SO was not a cacher.

 

Just as long as both people in the relationship respect the other's different interests, don't mind their engaging it and don't come to resent it I think it can work quite well.

 

When I started caching my wife had no interest in it so I'd cache alone or with my new found caching friends. She had no problem with me doing so. She was happy that I was doing something I enjoy. Now she is a cacher and really enjoys geocaching. She has her own account and hundreds of finds and we often cache together, but if that never happened I'd be good with that too.

 

I also enjoy fishing a great deal, I fish a lot more than I geocache. My wife doesn't care for it, so when I go fishing she visits friends.

 

Now if you have no interests in common, you probably aren't meant for each other, or if one SO resents or tries to stand in the way of the other's separate interests it doesn't bode well for the relationship.

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GeoReapers

+GeoReapers

Posted
Posted (edited)

My girlfriend and I started this together (even buying our first GPS together) and it is a pretty big factor in our lives. What it really allows is a structure for activities that we already enjoyed individually (hiking for me, birding for her etc...), so really it just strengthens things with us. I could not imagine being with someone that didn't take some interest in it as this is pretty much my primary hobby (other than homebrewing).

 

Edited for spelling.

Edited by GeoReapers
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Coldgears

+Coldgears

Posted
Posted

Depends on what type of caches you are doing. If you are doing all lamp posts, and tick infested woods with nothing to see but sticker bushes. I don't see why you should give up on a relationship. On the other hand, my whole life, going way back, I've always enjoyed getting out and seeing new areas. If my partner was to just sit home and watch TV, while I was down at Boathouse Row, or seeing the Amish in Lancaster, then there is something seriously wrong with that. Getting out of the house rather then watching TV, being on the internet, or playing video games is something very important to me. Of course, once the sun goes down, I'll be inside playing video games for 4 - 5 hours until I get tired (Yeah, insomnia...) but why waste perfectly good daylight with such activities?

 

Every single friend I have share the same view, we always are going out somewhere, whether we are going walking around woods, doing stuff like, fishing, swimming, building bridges over streams with rocks, stepping on puff-balls, or doing something in-doors like going to the mall, doing some mini-golf, or even just seeing a movie. I don't see why I would put the personality of a potential love interest any lower then that of a friend.

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knowschad

knowschad

Posted
Posted

My husband doesn't cache and I don't mind. I actually prefer it because I enjoy caching alone. I'd find it bothersome if he always wanted to go with me. I have caching buddies in my area, some that are snow birds, and some in other areas. So if I want to cache with someone, I just give them a ring.

 

Having similar hobbies isn't important to me. I can't imagine being married to a geocaching atheist tree-climbing vegan who does yoga. That sounds obnoxious! :P

 

You missed something. I fixed it. :)

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SeekerOfTheWay

+SeekerOfTheWay

Posted
Posted

My husband doesn't cache and I don't mind. I actually prefer it because I enjoy caching alone. I'd find it bothersome if he always wanted to go with me. I have caching buddies in my area, some that are snow birds, and some in other areas. So if I want to cache with someone, I just give them a ring.

 

Having similar hobbies isn't important to me. I can't imagine being married to a geocaching atheist tree-climbing vegan who does yoga. That sounds obnoxious! :P

 

You missed something. I fixed it. :)

 

I do wish he'd climb trees! I get stuck up there!

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Chokecherry

+Chokecherry

Posted
Posted

I'd prefer if my partner was not heavily into caching but didn't mind doing it once in awhile casually such as I would like to prefer to interact with his/her hobbies. I like there to be differences between us and our activities so there's something to talk about at the end of the day or whatever.

 

I'm difficult to get along with in a relationship. I accept it and my failed love life. lol

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TheAlabamaRambler

+TheAlabamaRambler

Posted
Posted

If the relationship depends on her doing what you like it's in trouble before it starts!

 

Plus, the woman you date will be a different person when you get married and a different person again in five years. Nothing is certain except change. She may love to cache with you today but hate it next year. You will have to deal with her not caching and she'll have to deal with you caching without her. If y'all can't accommodate each other like that, run.

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dfx

+dfx

Posted
Posted

Go on more FTF hunts. Get the FTF and then wait for others to show up. There's your dates!

Wouldn't work for me because I'd get a retired officer, a guy with a mustache on a motorcycle or a bald UPS driver. I love those guys...in a platonic sort of dude way, but not to date. Just sayin'.

 

Nobody said you were guaranteed a good date :P

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Sol seaker

+Sol seaker

Posted
Posted

I think it's good to have some separate interests, but I really would like my next partner to like caching.

 

Caching did a lot of good for my last relationship.

It was wonderful going out and exploring new places together. It was a lot of fun. I want that again in a relationship.

 

We also used to use it when we had fights. We would quit talking for a short time and then the next conversation would be about caching. Then after we had bridged the gap talking about caching, then we could talk about other stuff. It worked.

 

I don't expect my next boyfriend to be into everything I am, but I would like it if he would at least tolerate it and go on adventures with me. I need that in a partner at least.

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A & J Tooling

+A & J Tooling

Posted
Posted

If I had to hang around my wife more then a couple hours a day, I'd either be divorced or in jail pretty dang quick. I love her to death but there is a time for quiet. God, I need some quiet once in a while. Why do you think men are into fishing and hunting so much? Hours on end in the woods or on the lake for a couple of seconds of action? It's not the hunt or stalk or whatever, it's the peace and QUIET!!!

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Chokecherry

+Chokecherry

Posted
Posted

If I had to hang around my wife more then a couple hours a day, I'd either be divorced or in jail pretty dang quick. I love her to death but there is a time for quiet. God, I need some quiet once in a while. Why do you think men are into fishing and hunting so much? Hours on end in the woods or on the lake for a couple of seconds of action? It's not the hunt or stalk or whatever, it's the peace and QUIET!!!

 

When men go "hunting" here it's usually code for "meeting the mistress" and if they're "going to the shack" they actually going to shack up the mistress.

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Road Bug

Road Bug

Posted
Posted

A lot of women get paranoid when their husbands want some "alone" time although they think nothing of it when they go "shopping" for 8 hours. :blink:

 

Every human being needs alone time no matter who you are. It's all based on trust in a relationship and both people having the confidence to live in harmony.

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bookboy*

bookboy*

Posted
Posted

There are multiple stories of cachers getting married that I've heard through the Podcacher Podcast, most notably the hosts of the Podcast themselves! Geocaching played into the proposal, even. They talked about it on show 328 - find it at www.podcacher.com. There was also a travel bug story that related to geocachers dating and getting married. How fun!

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TheAlabamaRambler

+TheAlabamaRambler

Posted
Posted (edited)

When men go "hunting" here it's usually code for "meeting the mistress" and if they're "going to the shack" they actually going to shack up the mistress.

That may have been your unfortunate experience but I assure you that it is not true for the vast majority of men.

 

Having said that, I do know of 3 couples where he and she were married to someone else when they met through geocaching, dumped their spouses and got married. :blink:

 

I knew two of them before they met and they each needed a divorce about as bad as anyone I have seen, so the fault doesn't lie with geocaching, they'd have broken up anyway.

Edited by TheAlabamaRambler
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Chokecherry

+Chokecherry

Posted
Posted

When men go "hunting" here it's usually code for "meeting the mistress" and if they're "going to the shack" they actually going to shack up the mistress.

That may have been your unfortunate experience but I assure you that it is not true for the vast majority of men.

 

I wad never the wife or girlfriend of the men I've met throughout the years while working around where these shacks are. I was the one witnessing the debacle. So it's multiple womens experience in this neck of the woods.

 

I'm of the belief after being on all sides of the cheating equasion and in a knowingly open relationship that if some one is going to cheat they're going to do it. I trust my partner until I'm given a reason not to. At that point I evaluate if I can live with the relationship as it is or regain trust and start over or if I need to leave and make a decision very quickly. It's just not worth the drama for me.

 

That being said I don't care if my partner hunts or fishes. I don't care what the hobby is as long as they have one. I don't do the whole put a leash on someone game. They are adults. They can make their choices and I hope they are good.

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JL_HSTRE

+JL_HSTRE

Posted
Posted (edited)

My last relationship, although admittedly doomed to fail on many levels, was hard to manage because we did not share any hobbies.

He hated geocaching (among other outdoor activities) and we were rarely able to have fun together because we couldn't agree on fun activities.

 

I wouldn't date someone who shared none of my hobbies and would be really reluctant to date someone who hated any of my hobbies (especially since all of my hobbies are fairly tame and safe). I don't expect my girlfriend/wife to share all my hobbies, but if we don't share ANY hobbies what are we going to spend time together doing? And hating my hobbies feels like hating a part of me; I don't expect you to love everything about me, but at least be okay/tolerant of it.

 

Given I like to geocache while traveling or otherwise in the outdoors (woods/trails/parks), I'd really like her to share some interest in it even if she doesn't always go caching with me.

 

I've finally meet a decent number of geocachers around my age, although I think I might've only met one single female my age. Seems the vast majority of the female cachers I've met (of any age) cache with their SO.

 

Of course, I've had one date in the last 2 years so YMMV. But my other major hobbies in the last decade have either fewer females into them than geocaching (tabletop minatures wargaming, Magic The Gathering, football).

Edited by Joshism
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W7WT

+W7WT

Posted
Posted

My wife and I have been married for 64 years. In fact we went to Kauai geocaching for our 60th wedding anv. I have never pressed my wife to join me in the many hobbies I have had. When I bought our first airplane she said she wanted to get a license and she did get her private license when she was over 50. We made five trips to Alaska to visit our son and really enjoyed flying. Then we got too old to pass the physical and sold the plane and bought a Roadtrek van and did a lot of traveling. When I started geocaching in 2001 she would ride along and if I couldn't find the cache she would jump out and find it for me. Now she is an avid geocacher. We still love to travel and have found caches in all of the 50 states.

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Ms.Scrabbler

+Ms.Scrabbler

Posted
Posted

My wife and I have been married for 64 years. In fact we went to Kauai geocaching for our 60th wedding anv. I have never pressed my wife to join me in the many hobbies I have had. When I bought our first airplane she said she wanted to get a license and she did get her private license when she was over 50. We made five trips to Alaska to visit our son and really enjoyed flying. Then we got too old to pass the physical and sold the plane and bought a Roadtrek van and did a lot of traveling. When I started geocaching in 2001 she would ride along and if I couldn't find the cache she would jump out and find it for me. Now she is an avid geocacher. We still love to travel and have found caches in all of the 50 states.

hugs to you both.

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TheAlabamaRambler

+TheAlabamaRambler

Posted
Posted

My wife and I have been married for 64 years. In fact we went to Kauai geocaching for our 60th wedding anv. I have never pressed my wife to join me in the many hobbies I have had. When I bought our first airplane she said she wanted to get a license and she did get her private license when she was over 50. We made five trips to Alaska to visit our son and really enjoyed flying. Then we got too old to pass the physical and sold the plane and bought a Roadtrek van and did a lot of traveling. When I started geocaching in 2001 she would ride along and if I couldn't find the cache she would jump out and find it for me. Now she is an avid geocacher. We still love to travel and have found caches in all of the 50 states.

What a great story!

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Chokecherry

+Chokecherry

Posted
Posted

Sigh... to think about all the times I went fishing and actually fished!

Yeap. Now what do I do with all these fish and animals I've shot or caught?

 

 

 

Why would any man want more then one woman is beyond me? :unsure:

 

In my experience with the people I know who prolific philanderers they want one for fun without having the drama (in theory though it usually ends that way). And they want one for a roof over the head and food in the belly (also called old reliable).

 

Yup I know not everyone does it. If someone tells me they hunt and fish I ask for some stories of their conquests. If they are going fishing regularly and hunting regularly and don't have a single story to share about what they've caught or killed and most stories revolve around drunken antics I tend to be cautious about them.

 

Personally for me... at this point in my life one partner at a time is enough for me. It's entirely too hard to juggle more than one.

 

I've tried geocaching with one date. Dude started to complain when he had to walk 70 feet after talking all about how he wanted to try it. Total turn off. Would have rather done the caches myself as dragging someone along that didn't want to be there sucked.

 

Hobby wise I can live perfectly happily if our hobbies aren't the same. If they're complimentary that would be supper. I'd go out, buy a license and sit in a boat with a partner so he could get both our limits in fish if he agreed to bring me to some island caches. Not a problem with me.

 

I was talking to this guy wanted to go on a date and I asked him flat out what he was looking for in a woman and he could only say "someone to do stuff with." To me this sounds like someone looking for a buddy. I'm a fan of relationships starting out of friends but even at that point I felt trapped and we hadn't even gone a date yet. I don't have a strong need to constantly do stuff with my partner. I like to do some stuff. Most partners and I have some mutual interests else we wouldn't be together. But I hate constantly being around or being the source of entertainment for the person I'm with. I need spaces in my love or I feel smothered and trapped. But different strokes for different folks. Which is why people pair off differently.

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W7WT

+W7WT

Posted
Posted

My wife and I have been married for 64 years. In fact we went to Kauai geocaching for our 60th wedding anv. I have never pressed my wife to join me in the many hobbies I have had. When I bought our first airplane she said she wanted to get a license and she did get her private license when she was over 50. We made five trips to Alaska to visit our son and really enjoyed flying. Then we got too old to pass the physical and sold the plane and bought a Roadtrek van and did a lot of traveling. When I started geocaching in 2001 she would ride along and if I couldn't find the cache she would jump out and find it for me. Now she is an avid geocacher. We still love to travel and have found caches in all of the 50 states.

hugs to you both.

Thank you. Dick and Arlene

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TheAlabamaRambler

+TheAlabamaRambler

Posted
Posted

I thought of this thread today as I sat cruising this forum and playing Scrabble online with a friend.

 

My office has a long desk with 3 PCs and a TV on it, my wife of 38 years sits about four feet to my left, playing Word Mojo (a Scrabble-like word game) alone and chatting with her girlfriends online.

 

It struck me that we are quite different and yet so very much alike, both sitting here talking to others but not much to each other. We can share activities or a companionable silence.

 

It reminds me that I am so lucky... I can't even imagine dating and the mind games people play with each other. :D

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