Harassing behavior

[+CivilRightsCacher]

I have a question about what happens to someone when you report harassing behavior.

 

A geocacher has been contacting me repeatedly because he was not able to find my cache. I gave him a general description, but I did not want to give him the EXACT location because I felt that would defeat the purpose of geocaching (although, in retrospect, maybe that would have gotten this guy off my back alot quicker).

 

After numerous DNFs and emails to me about the cache, each one getting a little more rude, he contacted someone else who found my cache, who just happened to be an ex- coworker. After he made some rude insinuations about me to my coworker (ignorant of the fact that the person was my coworker) my coworker forwarded the email onto me to deal with. The guy is now emailing us both and is insinuating that we are one and the same. He will not leave me alone. Additionally, he hinted in his email that he had been contacting other cachers in the same manner, and I assume, accusing them of being me, of not really finding the cache, etc.

 

Now, with all that said.... I think he's just innocent-crazy. I dont want him to get in trouble, kicked out, etc. I just want him to leave me, and my coworker, alone. My coworker is trying to see if he can get his account deleted cause this is just not worth it to him because he was new to geocaching and this kinda turned him off.

 

I dont want to compound the situation by having this guy get in trouble.

 

Any suggestions?

[+webscouter.]

Send him a gimmie hint so he finds the cache and he will go away.

[+CivilRightsCacher]

Send him a gimmie hint so he finds the cache and he will go away.

 

Did that... hasn't worked yet. Im hoping if I ignore him, he'll get bored.

[jholly]

A. give the guy an explicit hint for your cache.

B. Archive the cache.

C. Contact Groundspeak and see if you can get the guy a timeout.

 

I guess option C is not one you want to pursue.

 

Jim

[+wkmccall]

 

B. Archive the cache.

 

 

Probably will have to if the person ever finds it - since it will probably turn up missing anyway..

 

Um,,, does this person have any of his own hides out there???

[+lordzogat]

Id ignore him.

[+Snoogans]

1. Go replace the cache with a throw away container and 1 sheet of paper in it.

 

2. Get the guy to send you his cell number and a time to call when you can talk him right to the cache.

 

3. When he gets to the cache tell him off.

 

4. If you can't tell him off put a note in the cache and hang up when he finds it.

 

5. Wear a kevlar undershirt to the next few events.

[Dinoprophet]

1) Ignore him, or

 

2) Tell him politely to stop harassing you. Tell him if it continues, you will alert Groundspeak per the terms of use and/or his ISP.

 

If he's a decent person, he'll stop and continue caching. If not, and you have to report him, then geocaching is no worse for it.

[+gpsfun]

1. Go replace the cache with a throw away container and 1 sheet of paper in it.

 

2. Get the guy to send you his cell number and a time to call when you can talk him right to the cache.

 

3. When he gets to the cache tell him off.

 

4. If you can't tell him off put a note in the cache and hang up when he finds it.

 

5. Wear a kevlar undershirt to the next few events.

I imagine Snoogans posted this at least partially in jest, but if you are thinking about item two, be sure to block sending your caller ID to the guy. You don't need him harassing you by phone as well as through e-mail.

[bogleman]

Have you told this person to stop sending you emails? Spell out the facts and tell them this is the best that can be done and this will be the last contact. Any further emails must be forwarded to GCHQ. Save your emails I am a trusting person to a point but if I tell you or anyone to stop you will stop. Just like any other form of harassment,

Edited August 15, 2008 by bogleman

[+angevine]

Number-one rule on the Internet (no matter what the venue): DON'T FEED THE TROLLS. Your exasperation is exactly what he's looking for.

 

Jeannette (angevine)

[+WatchDog2020]

I see in your profile you are an attorney. Send him a cease and desist order

[+BlueDeuce]

Never argue with a crazy person.

 

Be very polite and answer any geo-questions he has, but be extremely brief in your response. If you engage him in conversation he has an open door to keep emailing. If he gets his answers but no attention he'll eventually move on to other rantings elsewhere.

[+CYBret]

After looking at your two current caches and even the one that you archived yesterday due to some bad stuff in the area I have to wonder...where are the DNF's? These don't look like difficult caches.

 

Is this person just very very new?

[CoyoteRed]

"Sir,

 

I'm sorry you've not been able to find my cache even with repeated hints from me. Some caches have a difficulty level above which some folks can participate. For instance, I don't SCUBA dive so deep water caches are beyond my reach. I don't rock climb so those caches are also out of my reach.

 

In your case it appears you simply don't have the skills or mental capacity to complete the cache in question. Not everyone can complete every cache and that's okay. There are plenty of other caches to hunt and not all caches are expected to be completed by everyone. You might want to try to stick with caches rated 1 star on at least the difficulty scale.

 

In short, it's not my fault you're too stupid to find my cache, therefor stop bothering me.

 

Sincerely..."

 

 

EDIT TO ADD: said by someone who fully acknowledges that he, himself, is too stupid to figure out some caches. It's rare, but still, not all caches are meant to be found by everyone.

 

...and I don't pester the owner until I get a spoiler.

Edited August 15, 2008 by CoyoteRed

[+K7CJS]

Call the cops, ask them to send a patrol officer over (to you) and talk to him/her - show them the emails, etc and ask them to go talk to the guy. They will unless they are too busy. That should scare the guy off....if it doesn't, get a restraining order. No matter what, stop engaging with him.

 

I'm not one to assume anymore that these people are harmless. This guy is unstable, therefore, unpredictable. You want to take a chance with your health and safety and assume he's harmless then so be it....I sure wouldn't.

 

Good luck with this one.

[Mr.Yuck]

I have a question about what happens to someone when you report harassing behavior.

 

A geocacher has been contacting me repeatedly because he was not able to find my cache. I gave him a general description, but I did not want to give him the EXACT location because I felt that would defeat the purpose of geocaching (although, in retrospect, maybe that would have gotten this guy off my back alot quicker).

 

After numerous DNFs and emails to me about the cache, each one getting a little more rude, he contacted someone else who found my cache, who just happened to be an ex- coworker. After he made some rude insinuations about me to my coworker (ignorant of the fact that the person was my coworker) my coworker forwarded the email onto me to deal with. The guy is now emailing us both and is insinuating that we are one and the same. He will not leave me alone. Additionally, he hinted in his email that he had been contacting other cachers in the same manner, and I assume, accusing them of being me, of not really finding the cache, etc.

 

Now, with all that said.... I think he's just innocent-crazy. I dont want him to get in trouble, kicked out, etc. I just want him to leave me, and my coworker, alone. My coworker is trying to see if he can get his account deleted cause this is just not worth it to him because he was new to geocaching and this kinda turned him off.

 

I dont want to compound the situation by having this guy get in trouble.

 

Any suggestions?

 

That's funny. My crazed, obsessed kook internet stalker from a few years back (nothing to do with geocaching) thought that I too was several different people. What we would call "sock puppets". Must be a stalker thing, that they feel they are being tormented by an imaginary army of sock puppets.

 

First hand experience. Ignore. Completely ignore.

[+Renegade Knight]

...First hand experience. Ignore. Completely ignore.

Yup. Don't feed the guy the attention he craves. He will soon starve and go look elsewhere. (The Crazy example of who moved my cheese).

[+hitech squirrel]

I have a question about what happens to someone when you report harassing behavior.

 

 

I dont want to compound the situation by having this guy get in trouble.

 

Any suggestions?

 

Set up an email filter rule. Automatically deletes his emails.

 

Poof! Guy no longer exists.

 

-Hitech Squirrel

 

P.S. That'll be $150.

[+Castle Mischief]

Call the cops, ask them to send a patrol officer over (to you) and talk to him/her - show them the emails, etc and ask them to go talk to the guy. They will unless they are too busy. That should scare the guy off....if it doesn't, get a restraining order. No matter what, stop engaging with him.

 

I'm not one to assume anymore that these people are harmless. This guy is unstable, therefore, unpredictable. You want to take a chance with your health and safety and assume he's harmless then so be it....I sure wouldn't.

 

Good luck with this one.

 

In my personal experiance, the local police would have nothing to do with what, in their minds, was just "internet stuff". You're milage may vary.

 

I would ignore the guy. Tell him in specific terms that you do not want him to contact you again and that you will not be replying to any further emails. If it continues then google "Working to Halt On-Line Abuse". Fill out the form at "WHOA" and go from there. Read the tips on their site for dealing with this sort of thing while you're there.

[+9Key]

Is the cachers contacting you through geocaching.com? If so he might be violating the terms of use and you can send in a ticket to Ground Speak for investigation.

 

If its outside of this website I would do as others have suggested and try and ignore him. Just like in any segment of society there are nuts out there, geocaching is not exempt and I've found that out first hand, unforutnately.

[the3gmen]

Have you come flat out and asked him what type of information he wants from you ? If he wants more specific information than you care to give, tell him so and suggest he move on to another cache.

[sdarken]

I guess I'm echoing previous posters.

 

Give him the information he wanted, ask him to stop contacting you and then ignore all further communication from him. He'll eventually get bored with you and find someone else to bother or find another activity better suited to his mental state.

 

Dont debate or argue with him. It will just make things worse.

 

In my experience, if people contact me about a cache, they are already pretty frustrated and want specific help finding a cache. If you're not sure how much help someone wants, give them some hints and offer to give them more information if they still need help. Be careful about frustrating people further.

 

I've seen similar stories to yours in the forums.

[+K7CJS]

Call the cops, ask them to send a patrol officer over (to you) and talk to him/her - show them the emails, etc and ask them to go talk to the guy. They will unless they are too busy. That should scare the guy off....if it doesn't, get a restraining order. No matter what, stop engaging with him.

 

I'm not one to assume anymore that these people are harmless. This guy is unstable, therefore, unpredictable. You want to take a chance with your health and safety and assume he's harmless then so be it....I sure wouldn't.

 

Good luck with this one.

 

In my personal experiance, the local police would have nothing to do with what, in their minds, was just "internet stuff". You're milage may vary.

 

I would ignore the guy. Tell him in specific terms that you do not want him to contact you again and that you will not be replying to any further emails. If it continues then google "Working to Halt On-Line Abuse". Fill out the form at "WHOA" and go from there. Read the tips on their site for dealing with this sort of thing while you're there.

 

I live in a rural town and the police would be more than happy to have a chat with him - I'd at least give it a try.

[Mr.Yuck]

Is the cachers contacting you through geocaching.com? If so he might be violating the terms of use and you can send in a ticket to Ground Speak for investigation.

 

If its outside of this website I would do as others have suggested and try and ignore him. Just like in any segment of society there are nuts out there, geocaching is not exempt and I've found that out first hand, unforutnately.

 

The OP is Melson, and I'll bet the original correspondence came through the website, i.e. "kookboynetstalker contacting Melson from Geocaching.com". But once they had each other's email address, it has probably all been through private email.

 

I'm still going to say ignore everything from them. Reporting them to their ISP or TPTB at geocaching.com will only result in a minor slap on the wrist, and enrage them further.

 

Of course if at any time you feel you are in real danger, contact the police. He's obviously local to you, and you have an IP address from his emails. Whatever you do, don't delete those emails as they are evidence in the unlikely event you'll ever really need them. Back them up too!

[4wheelin_fool]

I have a question about what happens to someone when you report harassing behavior.

 

A geocacher has been contacting me repeatedly because he was not able to find my cache. I gave him a general description, but I did not want to give him the EXACT location because I felt that would defeat the purpose of geocaching (although, in retrospect, maybe that would have gotten this guy off my back alot quicker).

 

After numerous DNFs and emails to me about the cache, each one getting a little more rude, he contacted someone else who found my cache, who just happened to be an ex- coworker. After he made some rude insinuations about me to my coworker (ignorant of the fact that the person was my coworker) my coworker forwarded the email onto me to deal with. The guy is now emailing us both and is insinuating that we are one and the same. He will not leave me alone. Additionally, he hinted in his email that he had been contacting other cachers in the same manner, and I assume, accusing them of being me, of not really finding the cache, etc.

 

Now, with all that said.... I think he's just innocent-crazy. I dont want him to get in trouble, kicked out, etc. I just want him to leave me, and my coworker, alone. My coworker is trying to see if he can get his account deleted cause this is just not worth it to him because he was new to geocaching and this kinda turned him off.

 

I dont want to compound the situation by having this guy get in trouble.

 

Any suggestions?

 

Ask someone from a foreign country to adopt the cache for a few months while you continue to do maintenence for it. Tell your stalker that the cache page was "abducted" and you have no control over it anymore. If he tries to contact the "new owner", arrange to have him reply to the cacher in a foreign language and perhaps the cacher will get frustrated using babelfish and lose interest.

[+sejtam]

Any suggestions?

 

Have you checked that the cache is actually still present?

 

If it is I'd either just give him the final position with a note that you reserve the right to purge him again from the logs. If not, repair or archive the cache?

[+Smokey Bear Collector]

I'd just tell him where to look without hints. For instance, "Your'e looking for a toaster size box hidden behind a pile of rocks." Or, "you're looking for a green camo'd film cannister tied to a tree branch."

 

If telling him outright doesn't get him to leave you alone, then I'd apologize for not being able to better describe the cache better.

 

....You DID check to ensure the cache was not muggled, right?

[+wigglesworth]

If someone pleads for a detailed hint I would give explicit directions. This is about helping each other to enjoy the game. Some people do not want detailed hints biut others do. Help people to get what they want from the game!

[Clan Riffster]

Call the cops, ask them to send a patrol officer over (to you) and talk to him/her

We, (law enforcement), are not quite that digitized yet. Unless the guy has included his contact information, (real name & physical address), we would need to secure a warrant and submit it to his internet provider to figure out how to contact him. A judge will not sign a warrant unless the E-mails have reached the point of being criminal, and that varies from state to state. In Florida for example, you would need to demonstrate that you've told him to stop contacting you, and that his continuing to do so after being told to stop has created a well founded and reasonable degree of fear for your safety.

[+NYPaddleCacher]

If someone pleads for a detailed hint I would give explicit directions. This is about helping each other to enjoy the game. Some people do not want detailed hints biut others do. Help people to get what they want from the game!

 

That's what I would do. If someone wants to play the game such that they need or want specific directions to a cache that I own it doesn't change how I or anyone else plays the game. The only time I wouldn't give specific directions to someone that asks for it would be if the cache had not had a FTF and I obviously wouldn't give specific directions for a cache belonging to someone else.