Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
Followers 2
Geo.Error

Easter cointest

Recommended Posts

Hello to all! :(

 

On Holy Wednesday, there is a special event in Patmos island!

I am sure you know this island! Apocalypse was written there!!!

 

This event is called NIPTIRAS! the priests of the big castle monastery there, are remaking the moment when Jesus washed the legs of His students! Jesus is the abbot, Peter is the next older monk....etc!

The students sit in the chairs there like they were in the Last Supper!

The abbot after a while (they say all the words of the mass) takes water and washes the legs of the students!

 

Many tourists and locaql people are going to see that, which is taking place in the suare of the town on the hil, close to the castle monastery!

(I am saying this because the mail cities in Patmos are the one in the port called Skala, and the one - the old one around the monastery, called Chora!). Tney are making the mass there! It is so great!

 

Patmos is great in Easter! The monastery doesn't have electricity! At least it didn't have when I visited it! You are under candle lights, and this makes the whole thing amazing!!!

Share this post


Link to post

Good Morning! Let the fun begin! :(

 

Rabbit Revival

 

A man was driving along one day and he hit a rabbit. Feeling terrible he stopped and got out of the car to see if it was badly hurt. To his dismay, the rabbit was dead. Unsure what to do, the man runs to the nearest building, which happens to be a salon. He says to the hairdresser, "I've just hit and killed a rabbit in the middle of the road! What should I do?" The hairstylist thinks a moment, then says "I think I have just the thing." He grabs a few bottles from a shelf and runs out to the rabbit. Opening the bottles, he poured the contents onto the rabbit. Miraculously, the rabbit jumps up, shakes itself, looks around, then hops of. It went a few feet, then turned and waved, went a few more feet, then turned and waved again. This odd behavior continued untill the rabbit was out of sight. The man looked and the Hairdresser in amazement and says, "Wow! What did you do?" "Oh," the stylist responded, " I gave it a hair revitilisant with a wave!"

Share this post


Link to post

A rabbit came into a shop and asked, "Got any carrots?" The seller answered, "No!"

 

The next day the rabbit came again and asked, "Got any carrots?" The seller replied "No!"

 

Next day the rabbit came and asked, "Got any carrots?" The seller shouted, "No! And if you come again and ask for carrots, I'll take nails and hammer you on the wall by your ears!"

 

Early next morning the rabbit came back and asked, " Got any nails?" The seller answered, "No!" The rabbit asked, "Got any carrots?"

Share this post


Link to post

And the winner so far is dardevle with 57 posts. :(

 

Congratulations.

Edited by menace66

Share this post


Link to post

As soon as she could talk, the baby rabbit started to ask her mother where she'd come from. But the mother rabbit was far too busy to tell her.

 

The baby rabbit kept on asking until the mother rabbit couldn't stand it any more.

 

'All right,' she said, 'if you must know, 'you were pulled out of a magician's hat.'

:D:(:D:D

Share this post


Link to post

Teacher: If I give you two rabbits and two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got?

Paddy: Seven!

Teacher: No, listen carefully again. If I give you two rabbits and two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got?

Paddy: Seven!

 

Teacher: Let's try this another way. If I give you two apples and two apples and another two apples, how many apples have you got?

Paddy: Six.

 

Teacher: Good. Now if I give you two rabbits and two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got?

Paddy: Seven!

 

Teacher: How on earth do you work out that three lots of two rabbits is seven?

Paddy: I've already got one rabbit at home now!

Share this post


Link to post

Two rabbits

 

Two rabbits were being chased by a pack of wolves. The wolves chased the rabbits into a thicket. After a few minutes, one rabbit turned to the other and said, "Well, do you want to make a run for it or stay here a few days and out number them?"

Share this post


Link to post

What would Jesus do?

 

A man walked into a gift shop that sold religious items. Near the cash register he saw a display of caps with "WWJD" printed on all of them. He was puzzled over what the letters could mean, but couldn't figure it out, so he asked the clerk.

The clerk replied that the letters stood for What Would Jesus Do, and was meant to inspire people to not make rash decisions, but rather to imagine what Jesus would do in the same situation.

 

The man thought a moment and then replied, "Well, I'm dadgum sure Jesus wouldn't pay $17.95 for one of these caps."

Share this post


Link to post

Easter eggs! Easter eggs!

Hidden all away;

Let's go find our Easter eggs,

On this Easter Day.

 

Easter eggs! Easter eggs!

Don't you hide from me!

Look here, Sis, I found an egg,

Underneath the tree.

 

Easter eggs! Easter eggs!

What a pretty sight!

Blue and pink and yellow, too,

Purple, green and white.

Share this post


Link to post

A guy had a rabbit!

One day, he says to the rabbit: I have to go to work! When the phone rings, please answer it! They will be the guys from the Gas company! Please order only 1 ton petroleum for the central heating, ok?

- ok!!!

 

The guy left to work and left the rabbit at home!!!

After a couple of hours, the gas company rang! the rabbit ansered!

- how many tons of petroleum you want sir?

- (Oh, how many did my firned said????...)....10 tons!!!

- Ok sir, we are comming!!!

 

When the man came back home, he was socked! the gas tank was full, the petroleum was comming out of the tank, the ground was full of petroleum, the house too....

The man was furious!!! What have you done????? I told you only 1 ton! the tank is only for 1 ton!!!! What is the matter with you?????

 

- well, the rabbit said, I didn't hear you well, and ordered 10 tons!!!

- Ten tons???? Not only you destroyed my house, now I have to give a fortune to the Gas company!!!

You didn't hear me??? You have huge ears and you didn't hear me???

I will hang you from the ears until you will learn to hear and think what you have done!!!!

 

The guy took the rabbit, and hang him from his ears!

While he was like that, he saw on the wall, a cross with Jesus on it, crussified!

- Oh boy!!! How many tons did you ordered????

Share this post


Link to post

The little birds with joy will sing,

On Easter morn, on Easter morn,

The lilies fair, their bells will ring,

On Easter morn.

Old winter's cold and snows have past,

New life, new hopes, are here at last,

On Easter morn, on Easter morn,

On Easter morn.

 

Each blade of grass that upward springs,

On Easter morn, on Easter morn,

To waiting hearts a message brings,

On Easter morn.

The life that buds in flower and tree,

Will bring new hope to you and me,

On Easter morn, on Easter morn,

On Easter morn.

Share this post


Link to post

Easter Song

 

Hear the bells ringing

They're singing that you can be born again

Hear the bells ringing

They're singing christ is risen from the dead

 

The angel up on the tombstone

Said he has risen, just as he said

Quickly now, go tell his disciples

That jesus christ is no longer dead

 

Joy to the word, he has risen, hallelujah

He's risen, hallelujah

He's risen, hallelujah

 

Hear the bells ringing

They're singing that you can be healed right now

Hear the bells ringing, they're singing

Christ, he will reveal it now

 

The angels, they all surround us

And they are ministering jesus? power

Quickly now, reach out and receive it

For this could be your glorious hour

 

Joy to the world, he has risen, hallelujah

He's risen, hallelujah

He's risen, hallelujah, hallelujah

 

The angel up on the tombstone

Said he has risen, just as he said

Quickly now, go tell his disciples

That jesus christ is no longer dead

 

Joy to the world, he has risen, hallelujah

He's risen, hallelujah

He's risen, hallelujah

Hallelujah

Share this post


Link to post

A rabbit went to a bakery once!

 

-Hello, do you have 20000 loafs of bread?

- 20000? No!!!!

- ok sir, thank you!

 

..and the rabbit left.

 

The next day, the rabbit went again to the bakery!

- Goodmorning sir, do you have 20000 loafs of bread today?

- No!!! I do not have 20000 loafs!!!

- Ok, sir, goodbue!

 

The baker was a little confused! A rabbit is asking for such a big number of loafs of bread? why? I thought rabbits liked carrots only!

 

Next morning the rabbit went again1

- hello sir! Do you have 20000 loafs of bread today?

- NO!!!! the baker said with nerves!

- Oh!!! Ok sir!!!

 

The rabbit left and the baker was so furious with all that!!!

"He comes every day asking for 20000 loafs of bread!!! I will sho him...I will make them!!!"

 

All night the baker was making bread! He was so tired, but he was going to give a lesson to the rabbit!

 

Next morning, the rabbit went again!

- hello sir! Do you have 20000 loafs of bread today??

- YES!!! I have 20000 loafs of bread today!!!!

- Oh!!!! And how will you sell this big number??? ...Said the rabbit and left!!!

Share this post


Link to post

On Good Friday, the entire Church fixes her gaze on the Cross at Calvary. Each member of the Church tries to understand at what cost Christ has won our redemption. In the solemn ceremonies of Good Friday, in the Adoration of the Cross, in the chanting of the 'Reproaches', in the reading of the Passion, and in receiving the pre-consecrated Host, we unite ourselves to our Savior, and we contemplate our own death to sin in the Death of our Lord.

 

The Church - stripped of its ornaments, the altar bare, and with the door of the empty tabernacle standing open - is as if in mourning. In the fourth century the Apostolic Constitutions described this day as a 'day of mourning, not a day of festive joy,' and this day was called the 'Pasch (passage) of the Crucifixion.'

 

The liturgical observance of this day of Christ's suffering, crucifixion and death evidently has been in existence from the earliest days of the Church. No Mass is celebrated on this day, but the service of Good Friday is called the Mass of the Presanctified because Communion (in the species of bread) which had already been consecrated on Holy Thursday is given to the people .

 

Traditionally, the organ is silent from Holy Thursday until the Alleluia at the Easter Vigil , as are all bells or other instruments, the only music during this period being unaccompanied chant.

 

The omission of the prayer of consecration deepens our sense of loss because Mass throughout the year reminds us of the Lord's triumph over death, the source of our joy and blessing. The desolate quality of the rites of this day reminds us of Christ's humiliation and suffering during his Passion. We can see that the parts of the Good Friday service correspond to the divisions of Mass:

Share this post


Link to post

One day, a rabbit went to a bar!

 

He went to the bar and asked for carrot juice!

 

The barman gave him the juice and he said: 2 dollars please!

 

the rabbit drunk the juice and then he took out of his wallet, 2 one dollar coins! He put one in one corner of the bar and the other at the other corner!

 

Ok? He asked!

 

The barman thought that the rabbit was joking and didn't say anything!

 

Next day, the rabbit went again!

A carrot juice please!

Once again he did the same!

The barman didn't like it but...

 

This was continued for a week, and the barman was getting mad!

"The rabbit is putting the money at the corners to make fool of me!! I will show him!!!"

 

When the next day the rabbit went to the bar, the barman smiled!

- a carrot juice please

- yes sir!

he filled a glass with carrot juice and said, 3 dollars please!

- 3 dollars? The price went up?

- yes sir! what can I say!

- Ok...do you have change from a 5 dollar bill?

- Yes of course!!!!

 

The barman take the 5$ banknote and as change he took 2 coijs of 1$!

He placed one in one corner and the other in the other corner of the bar!

- Ok sir? Here are your change!!! Said the barman with a smile!!!

the rabbit took out of his wallet an other 1$ coin, he placed it in the middle of the bar and said to the barman:

"Ok....can I have an other one please???"

 

:(

Share this post


Link to post

With Apologies to Blondes comes this new Easter joke

 

Three blondes died and are at the pearly gates of heaven. St. Peter tells them that they can enter the gates if they can answer one simple question. St. Peter asks the first blonde, "What is Easter?" The blonde replies, "Oh, that's easy! It's the holiday in November when everyone gets together, eats turkey, and are thankful and stuff..." "Wrong!," replies St. Peter, and proceeds to ask the second blonde the same question, "What is Easter?" The second blonde replies, "Easter is the holiday in December when we put up a nice tree, exchange presents, and drink eggnog." St. Peter looks at the second blonde, shakes his head in disgust, tells her she's wrong, and then peers over his glasses at the third blonde and asks, "What is Easter?" The third blonde smiles confidently and looks St. Peter in the eyes, "I know what Easter is." "Oh?" says St. Peter, incredulously. "Easter is the Christian holiday, that coincides with the Jewish celebration of Passover. Jesus and his disciples were eating at the last supper. Then the Romans took him to be crucified and he was stabbed in the side, made to wear a crown of thorns, and was hung on a cross with nails through his hands. He was buried in a nearby cave which was sealed off by a large boulder." St. Peter smiles broadly with delight. Then the third blonde continues, "Every year the boulder is moved aside so that Jesus can come out...and, if he sees his shadow, there will be six more weeks of winter."

Share this post


Link to post

The Playboy Bunny outfit was the first service uniform registered with the United States Patent and Trademark Office (U.S. trademark registration number 0762884). The tight costume forced servers to bend at the knees, not the waist, when serving drinks; this maneuver became known as the "Bunny Dip". All drinks were served in the same glass, the long stemmed "Bolo Grande". A special round tray was developed with holes along the sides. The glasses stem would slip through and the bowl would sit flat on the tray. This allowed the Bunnies to carry drinks without spilling them and facilitated the dip.

 

The uniforms were custom made for each Bunny. There was usually a seamstress for each Club to maintain the fit. To avoid rumours, the Club Manager had only two responsibilities for the Bunnies, floor service and weigh in. Before every shift the Manager would weigh in each Bunny. Bunnies could not gain or lose more than one pound. Exceptions were made for water retention. Playboy Enterprises required all employees to turn in their costumes at the end of employment and Playboy has some costumes in storage. Occasionally costumes are offered for sale on the Playboy Auction site or eBay.[2] Some of the costumes on eBay may be counterfeit or damaged in some way. Genuine Bunny costumes in good condition have sold for over $10,000.[citation needed] The only two on public display are in the collections of The Smithsonian[3] and the Chicago History Museum.[4]

 

There is a bar near the University of Illinois campus, in downtown Urbana, IL, that has a picture of Hefner hanging on the wall with a letter that appears to be signed by him. The letter indicates that the bar, called "Bunny's," served as inspiration for the famous playboy bunny mascot

Share this post


Link to post

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  
Followers 2

×