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Sadness...Coin Drop Mission

BlueMotmot

By BlueMotmot
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BlueMotmot

+BlueMotmot

Posted
Posted (edited)

My mother died yesterday, and though her health was not good, her death was not expected.

 

I want to drop activated coins in her memory in places she had lived, so....

 

I'm seeking cachers who will drop activated coins for me in the following places:

 

Miami, FL

Key West, FL

Port Angeles, WA

Philomath, OR

San Fernando Valley, CA

Modesto, CA

 

If you are able to take on any of these drops, please email me and I will get activated coins on their way to you.

 

I will also send coins to others who agree to drop them.

 

Thank you for your help with this,

 

Valerie

 

p.s. Those of you awaiting trades from me, have faith they will happen, it will just take me a it longer to get them out.

Edited by BlueMotmot
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sweetlife

+sweetlife

Posted
Posted

Valarie, I am so sorry to hear about your mom passing away. I know it is so hard to loose a parents, I have been lucky so far to have both of mine yet but think of the day all the time when I am going to have to face it at some point and I know that it is not going to be easy. I dont do well with death in the first place but all of my life that is all I have done is taken care of people. I worked with mentally handicapped/physically handicapped people for over 10 years, Also was a live in caregiver for a lady at the age of 16-18 until she passed away, was still in school and when i was in school my mom stayed with her but I moved out at the age of 16 and lived with this lady. She was a blessing in my heart. I loved that lady like she was my own relative. I also took care of both of my husband grandparents along with my grandmother. Just recently lost my job taking care of a lady that I was taking care of in her home and now she is in a nursing home because she is not doing good, I miss all of these people so much. I was with these people all the way up intil the moment they passed away. It is been so hard. But I always tell myself with the grace of god is why I have such a love for people is for all the help I have given to all these people and I have been blessed to have each and eveyone of them in my life. Guess my life has told me something that I need to be around people and people are my life. So when that day comes to having to face the day of my parents death, I just can't imagine. There is not a time that I see my parents or just talk to them on the phone that before I leave or hang up the phone "I Love You", because it could be anyones time, and I will know in my heart I got to say Bye.

 

 

My sympathies are with you and your family during your time of loss.

 

 

Valarie of sweetlife

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Geo.Error

+Geo.Error

Posted
Posted

BlueMotmot,

Im sorry to hear from your lost.

A mother is everthing in live, i wish you a lot of strong to.

My condolences to you and your family.

It is a nice idea to let coins travel in the name of your mother.

A great way to remember her.

If you like i want to let your coins free in the Netherlands.

Let me know if you like this idea.

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BVnLJ

+BVnLJ

Posted
Posted (edited)

Awww Valerie I am so sorry for your loss. Mothers are such a vital and important part of our lives from the very beginning and nothing can ever replace them. Just have to thank God that he gave her to you to love and be loved in return. :rolleyes:

Edited by bvnlj
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gardengorilla

+gardengorilla

Posted
Posted

I'm very sorry to hear of your mothers' passing. I think that it speaks volumes that you can turn to the forums for comfort in times like this and people are there for you. A lot of times there are people that you encounter everyday who just don't know how to express sadness, sorrow, and sympathy and who just can't seem to find the right words. My hope for you is that you find comfort from friends far and wide. Love and Light.

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fairyhoney

+fairyhoney

Posted
Posted

Valerie, There's no words I can say without it sounding like a cliche. I won't say that the pain gets easier :rolleyes: . Just know that WE are here for you and that WE care. I only live 2 hours from Port Angeles but I don't know when I'll be able to get up that way. I would be happy to help release your coins around where I Do live, though <_<

Fairyhoney

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ThePetersTrio

+ThePetersTrio

Posted
Posted

My condolences for your loss. I think your tribute to your mom's life by the dropping of coins is a beautiful thing to do.

 

I'm pretty far from Philomath, Oregon but if no one from closer to that area can help, I'm happy to make the trip - but it would have to be next month. I just have to think that someone who lives in Benton County (Corvallis area) or nearby would know of a beautiful cache location that would be worthy of this honor.

 

But if I can help, please contact me.

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Dolfy

+Dolfy

Posted
Posted

I'm soo sorry to hear about your mom Valerie. :rolleyes: It's always been hard to find the words to say for the loss of a parent but as fairyhoney stated "we" are all here for you. :::HUGS:::

 

I'm not near anywhere you wanted coins dropped but I would be willing to help out if you'd like.

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Landsharkz

+Landsharkz

Posted
Posted

Valerie, we are so sorry to hear of your loss :rolleyes: .

 

We go to Port Angeles, WA every couple of weeks on the ferry from Victoria BC. We have our US distribution centre there. I'd be happy to drop a coin in a cache in Port Angeles, WA in memory of you Mom. What was her first name? When did she live in Port Angeles?

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n8turgrl

+n8turgrl

Posted
Posted

So sorry to hear of your loss! I think this type of memorial is a wonderful idea! I'm not in any of the locations you specified but if you want one in North Carolina i'll be happy to drop one for you. (It's not Florida but I95 runs through here and most going to Florida from the North East travel 95 to get to Florida)

 

I'll keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers!

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BlueMotmot

+BlueMotmot

Posted
  • Author
Posted

Thank you all for your support. I didn't reveal what happened to her in my first post but now I feel up to it.

 

My mother was place in a nursing home in January - I just couldn't work and take care of her. I received a call Tues pm that she was sick, something about kidneys and blood clots and breathing difficulties. When I got there I was told I had to decide whether to have her right leg amputated. She had gotten so dehydrated at the nursing home she started throwing blood clots and one went to her leg. She was unable to communicate the problem and no one at the nursing home noticed for at least a day, maybe longer. When I got to the hospital her leg was cold, numb, and dead. I couldn't imagine her waking up from surgery finding her leg gone and having to cope with the physical and mental trauma, but if her leg wasn't amputated she was going to die from the decaying muscle toxins. She was too confused to help with the decision so it was up to me.

 

I finally okayed the surgery, otherwise I would have felt responsible for her death. After taking her into surgery the doctors changed their minds, said she wouldn't likely survive the surgery and she went to ICU. I thought she still had days, did not realize it was only hours, and she passed away shortly after I left to get a few hours rest.

 

Though I wish I had been there when she passed, we did have a few decent hours together in the ER. Though I feel the nursing home blew it, I also know she had not had quality of life for some time.

 

Thank you all for allowing me to vent here, I hope no one finds it offensive.

 

Valerie

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OverTheEdge

+OverTheEdge

Posted
Posted

Valerie,

 

My thoughts and sympathies are with you and your family. :huh:

 

I really like your idea to let coins travel in the name of your mother - let me know if you would like to get together to drive to Modesto to release some coins. If you can't go, I can make the trip in April to release some coins for you.

 

Return to the forum to vent / talk any time.

 

OverTheEdge

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GPX Navigators

+GPX Navigators

Posted
Posted

Oh Valerie -

 

Our deepest sympathies are with you. We are so sorry for your loss.

 

And you have created a wonderful tribute to your mom with your coin release project. :huh:

 

 

I do agree with you that the nursing home blew it. When you feel up to it, I hope you are able to take them to task. It is inexcusable what they did. It's a sad comment on this country what is allowed to happen during the care of one of the greatest resources we have - our people full of all the stories & histories of what has come before us. Those are the people that deserve our deepest respect and thanks. You are in our prayers.

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rivercity

+rivercity

Posted
Posted

Dear Valerie,

 

I am so sorry to hear about your mother. This is not an easy time, I know. I hope you find comfort in loving memories of your mother and strength from your family and friends. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.

 

I would be happy to drop a memorial coin in Modesto for you.

 

Take care.

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fairyhoney

+fairyhoney

Posted
Posted

Valerie, I just found this and I Know it's long but here you go . . .

 

Grieving and mourning are natural processes. Grief is not only a natural reaction to loss, it's a necessary reaction if you are to regain your sense of self and go on with your life.

 

Grieving is nature's way of helping us to cope with life - and go on with life. When you have sustained the loss of someone dear to you, it is almost as though you have been physically wounded - shattered, might be a better word - a part of you and your life has been taken from you.

 

And while you may heal to some extent, you will never be the same person you were. Your loss has changed you forever - and changed your life forever. And it is best to acknowledge that and accept it - as we must accept so many things in life.

 

Understanding that grief is normal and natural doesn't make the process any easier. It's a dark, painful tunnel you must travel through at your own pace.

 

If we tell you there will eventually be light at the end of that tunnel, you may have a hard time believing that - and perhaps we won't be helping you much. You must now experience that dark in the tunnel and only later - after time and much active grieving - will you come to see that there is any light at all.

 

When you are dealing with the loss of someone close - like a spouse, lover or dear friend - you are dealing with one of the most stressful situations known to human beings. On a stress-scale created in the 1960's, the death of a spouse was calculated at 100 - the top score - the most stressful event in the life cycle.

 

One thing that may help you is to understand that the more fully you grieve - that is actively feel your pain and loss and express your feelings about that - that is to cry and mourn to the fullest - the more quickly you will heal and be able to move on with your life.

 

When we say you will be able to move on with your life, we don't mean you will forget your loss. Of course not. But we mean you will be able to move on with many positive aspects of life - despite the severity of your loss.

 

In the meantime, here are some things you can do to help yourself process your grieving and perhaps get some sleep.

 

Realize how normal and healthy it is to grieve.

The more you feel your pain and loss and the more you express your sadness and rage - the more quickly you will feel some relief. Have you ever seen in news photos or on the news on tv how people grieve in middle eastern countries? They cry and scream their hearts out - with no sense of shame about it - they hold nothing back. This is acceptable in their societies and perhaps it's the healthiest way to deal with the unbearable pain of loss. Maybe we can learn something important from them.

 

Perhaps friends or family have urged you to move on with your life - to "get over it" - but we don't believe that advice is helpful. If you are feeling the need to grieve, then that is what you need to do - to actively mourn your loss. The more fully you can express your feelings, the better you will feel and the faster you will be back on your feet.

 

If your grief is new, you may feel that that will never be possible - and in a sense, you're right - you'll never be the same person after sustaining a serious loss. But that doesn't mean you can't go on and lead a useful, productive and enjoyable life - even after the worst, most devastating loss.

 

If your grief is very fresh, you perhaps feel that no one else has ever suffered as you are suffering - and this is a most understandable feeling. You are in deep and terrible pain - raw, searing pain - and you have a right to feel it fully.

 

In fact, an important step in grieving is realizing that you have a right to your grief - to feel your grief and experience it fully. No one has the right to take away your grieving. No one should even suggest that.

 

If you have had trouble crying, you might need to give yourself permission to cry - to cry and cry and cry and cry - as much as you feel the urge. The more you cry and weep the more you will help yourself.

 

We urge you to cry as much as you need to - to simply cry and cry and cry and cry - as freely as a baby does. Put no restraint on your urge to cry. That's something you need to do - your system needs you to do that.....

 

In fact, the most important thing you can do to help yourself is to give yourself permission to grieve as fully as you need to grieve. The more you're able to do this now - even if it's the middle of the night - the more relief you will feel.

 

Sometimes it's even good to take out an object that reminds you of your loved one - perhaps a photograph or a letter or a favorite possession - and hold that object and let the sadness it inspires in you draw out of you all your sorrow and tears. You need to experience that bottomless, endless grief that will eventually lead you to feeling better than you do now . . .

 

(I wish I had seen this almost 2 years ago :huh: )

 

Fairyhoney

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chancerider

+chancerider

Posted
Posted

Valerie, my thoughts are with you. I hope you're able to gain comfort from your friends on these boards. A few years ago I lost both my step-mom and "Pop" within a couple of months of each other. I don't know when it happened... but the pain of their passing finally eased, and I'm now able to smile or even laugh at memories we shared.

 

~Eve

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Highland Geofairy

Highland Geofairy

Posted
Posted

So sorry to read of your loss, and the traumatic time that led up to it. I hope you will take comfort from the memories of happier times shared with your Mother and in time that you will feel that you can celebrate her life and all that she meant to you.

 

It would seem from what you say that the nursing home have been incredibly negligent, taking them to task over it will be testing and require strength, and whilst I would normally err on the side of forgiveness, there are others still in their care. They should be made accountable. I pray that you find the strength and courage to come to terms with your loss, that you persue a course of action through a concern for others and not out of any bitterness. Think deeply, speak gently, my thoughts are with you.

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plumbrokeacres

+plumbrokeacres

Posted
Posted

I am so sorry to hear about your loss :huh:

I lost my father in a auto accident 9 years ago 3 days before my parents 30th wedding anniversary.

the pain does get easier as time goes on I sent out a travel bug in honor of my dad shortly after getting into Caching. I get great enjoyment in watching his bug travel to all the place he wanted to go to but never made it to visit. releasing the coins is an excellent idea I'm in northern BC so a little out of the way for where you want the coins dropped but hopefully one day one will make it up here.

 

Andrew

Plumbrokeacres

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Cache Maine

+Cache Maine

Posted
Posted (edited)

BlueMotMot.....We are sorry to hear about this....our thoughts are with you and your family during this difficult time.

 

Your plan to release trackables in her "places" is very sweet....I hope they travel far and you enjoy their movements.

 

My fiance used to live in Port Angeles and we hope that some day, we can make the trek from Maine so he can show me around.

 

Cache Maine

Edited by Cache Maine
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BlueMotmot

+BlueMotmot

Posted
  • Author
Posted

The caring messages everyone here has left comforts me alot. I go through phases of numbness and grief, and am taking it very slow. I'm keeping busy because I do not know what else to do with myself. Its both sad and helpful to hear of the losses of others, and to know that this will pass.

 

Within the next week I will activate some coins and mail them out - I'm thinking of making the above cities their destination instead of their starting point to make it easier for them to get there.

 

Thank you for being here for me,

Valerie

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hollora

+hollora

Posted
Posted

Valerie,

 

My heart and thoughts are with you during this difficult time. The outpouring of concern and thoughts on this thread is but a small example of the support from this community. Coins released in your Mom's memory are a wonderful idea.

 

I live in the wrong area of the country but know there will be others to fulfill the mission. May peace comfort you in your daily journey.

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Cache Maine

+Cache Maine

Posted
Posted

I'm thinking of making the above cities their destination instead of their starting point to make it easier for them to get there.

 

 

We'd be happy to start one here in Maine....even if we don't make it to Port Angeles soon, I hope your coin will! Let us know if you need our help, or anything else for that matter. Thinking of you!

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