Please check my english translation

[+DaRkBoDoM]

Hi all, this is my first post

 

I'm ready to hide a new multicache and I would appreciate if any english geocacher may check my translation of the cache description (my english skill is not so good )

 

Thank you!

 

“Sapia” is an easy multicache on 3 stages through the historical center of the town of Colle di Val d'Elsa. The cache lies near the Bastion of Sapia, from wich it takes its name. Indicated terrain difficulty is 2 because you may encounter some tall grasses on the final part of the path during some periods of the year. Waypoints are really close each other so it shouldn't take more than one hour to discover the final cache.

 

The entire hunt develops inside a Limited Traffic Zone, the best place to park your car is at 43° 25.299' N 11° 06.970' E, but, if you are not running out of time, I suggest you to park at 43° 25.236' N 11° 06.755' E then walk by foot through the historical center that certainly deserves to be visited.

 

So, reach the first waypoint, where you'll find a memorial stone. Upon this stone they're two numbers, first one is in roman numerals, second one is in arabic numerals instead.

The coordinates of second waypoint are:

43° 25.xxx' N 11° 07.yyy' E

xxx=320 + first number

yyy=1423 – second number

 

When you reach the second waypoint, you'll find a strange monument. There are only letters this time, but it doesn't matter if you don't know italian language because you just have to count of how many characters the inscription is composed.

Finally, these are the coordinates for the cache:

43°25.xxx' N 11.07.yyy' E

xxx=000 + number of chars

yyy=111 + number of chars

 

Happy hunt!

 

Curiosities:

Local tradiction wants that Sapia Salvani from Siena, during the Battle of Colle of Jun 17, 1269 between guelphs and ghibellines (as Dante also wrote) was observing this event from the bastion of Baluardo (near first waypoint) and praying for the defeat of her fellow-citizens, leaded by her nephew: Provenzano Salvani. Sapia was really hating Provenzano because of political reasons. Fate wanted to accomplish Sapia's prayers and then 1.100 guelph soldiers of Colle put in place a good trick and defeat an army of 9.400 ghibellines from Siena. Provenzano doesn't wanted to come back to Siena as a loser, then he decided to throw himself under the fury of battle and so be killed.

[+StarBrand]

For the most part - perfectly understandable and readable. Could be cleaned up just a bit here and there but for that matter so could about 50% of the ones written by people that speak english.

[+Haffy]

I think you have done an excellent job and as Starbrand has mentioned people who speak English aren't as eloquent as you have spoken and written. Just a couple of very small grammatical errors but nothing I would worry about.

[+hukilaulau]

I agree with the above two posters. A fine and perfectly adequate translation! You really don't have to change a thing, BUT if you want to clean it up a little here are a few suggestions:

Line 3: close "to" each other

line 6: "There are" two numbers

line 20: "Tradition"

[+briansnat]

Good job. Actually better English than I see from many Americans.

 

If you want to tighten it up a bit, here are some suggestions:

 

“Sapia” is an easy multicache of 3 stages that take you through the historical center of the town of Colle di Val d'Elsa. The cache lies near the Bastion of Sapia, from which it takes its name. The terrain difficulty is 2 because you may encounter some tall grasses on the final part of the path during some periods of the year. Waypoints are really close each other so it shouldn't take more than one hour to discover the final cache.

 

The entire hunt is inside a Limited Traffic Zone. The best place to park your car is at 43° 25.299' N 11° 06.970' E, but if you have the time I suggest you to park at 43° 25.236' N 11° 06.755' E, then walk through the historical center, which is certainly worth a visit.

 

Upon reaching the first waypoint you'll find a memorial. Upon this stone there are two numbers. The first one is in Roman numerals and second one is in Arabic numerals.

The coordinates of second waypoint are:

43° 25.xxx' N 11° 07.yyy' E

xxx=320 + first number

yyy=1423 – second number

 

When you reach the second waypoint, you'll find a strange monument. There are only words in Italian this time, but it doesn't matter if you don't know Italian because you just have to count the number of characters in the inscription.

Finally, these are the coordinates for the cache:

43°25.xxx' N 11.07.yyy' E

xxx=000 + number of chars

yyy=111 + number of chars

 

Happy hunting!

 

Curiosities:

Local tradition tells of the Sapia Salvani from Siena, who was observing the Battle of Colle between Guelphs and Ghibellines (as Dante also wrote) from the bastion of Baluardo (near the first waypoint) on Jun 17, 1269. She was praying for the defeat of her fellow-citizens lead by her nephew, Provenzano Salvani. Sapia hated Provenzano because of political reasons. Sapia's prayers were answered when the 1.100 Guelph soldiers of Colle use a trick to defeat an army of 9.400 Ghibellines from Siena. Provenzano didn't want to return to Siena as a loser, so he threw himself into the thick of the battle and was killed.

Edited October 22, 2007 by briansnat

[+DaRkBoDoM]

I've just submitted the new cache for review

 

Thank you guys.