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Is Caching Disrupting Your Marriage?


lacey38655
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Ive taken my husband a few times......but hes so technical....that he expects the GPS to start beeping and pointing to the cache. I usually have log signed and cache replaced before he looks up from the GPS.

Ive slowed down CONSIDERABLY! Since I started.....no hard feat, Ive found everything within 30 miles. But he did resent it when I started and was off caching instead of say, washing cloths or dishes that were piled in the sink and beyond.

He will occasional help me make a cache, or bring an idea home , but I just dont think this is his cup of te......um beer.

I just tell him that time caching is time not shopping, my prior hobby. That seems to suit him. And I get some cool time in with my kids when I DO go caching. I have 5, so I only take 1-2 at a time for some mommy time.

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Heard about GeoCaching about 2 years ago. Got a GPS about a year ago. Entered co-ords for my first cache find 2 days ago. Found our first cache today. I am the gadget geek, and the one who found Geocaching. My wife was very keen when I told her about it, and came along. She actually found the cache, after I got us there. Funny thing is, we have walked past that spot so very many times, as it is on our usual walking path.

 

We are looking forward to our next cache. We both like walking, this just gives us different routes, and a new focus.

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Ive taken my husband a few times......but hes so technical....that he expects the GPS to start beeping and pointing to the cache. I usually have log signed and cache replaced before he looks up from the GPS.

Ive slowed down CONSIDERABLY! Since I started.....no hard feat, Ive found everything within 30 miles. But he did resent it when I started and was off caching instead of say, washing cloths or dishes that were piled in the sink and beyond.

He will occasional help me make a cache, or bring an idea home , but I just dont think this is his cup of te......um beer.

I just tell him that time caching is time not shopping, my prior hobby. That seems to suit him. And I get some cool time in with my kids when I DO go caching. I have 5, so I only take 1-2 at a time for some mommy time.

I just started this year. :laughing: Bought my gps on Ebay. Had a hard time figuring out how to operate it. :( I took it with us on vacation to the pony islands. I thought I could work it out on the way east. No such luck. :cool: Due to a chronic illness, my reading comprehension isn't what it used to be. And I have a memory like a steel sieve! Anyway, long story shortened, Long Arm ( hubby) got it to work and then showed me how. :anitongue: I made my first two finds on the human populated island. There are four caches there total. None on the other. I get him to go with when I can but he usually begs off.

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The wife is getting to the point now where it's hard to keep her out of the woods. Recently we traded our Ford Crown Victoria for a Jeep Cherokee. Last weekend we went on a hike for several hours for one cache, then drove further north into the woods and camped in a tent next to a waterfall for the night. I expected her to pack it in when I found a freshly killed and half-eaten peregrine falcon on the other side of the river from our camp, but she didn't bat an eye. We broke camp before daylight so we could make it to a cache at Michigan's highest point for sunrise. Both of us enjoyed every minute of it.

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My husband and I enjoy caching together.

 

Sometimes when we get close to a cache I will start looking the area over and tell him where I think the cache is. If I'm right, he will tell me that where he thought it was.

 

Then again he will spot the cache and let me look and look when I get frustrated he will get me within a few feet. When I see it was in plain sight. He starts laughing, cause he knows the what I'll say,"I hate you."

 

Not really I'll always Love him.

 

Edit: If it doesn't make sense to you. Then I haven't had my coffee yet. :blink:

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I have just started caching, and already I am thinking about caching 24-7. Every other word out of my mouth has been something on the lines of caching. I stay up late thinking of the next find, where it is, etc... I forgot to put my daughters socks on this morning because I was looking over a new GPS software. My husband thinks this is all funny, so he joined up just so we could spend more time together. I was wondering has caching caused problems in anyones marriage, or family?

 

Everything in moderation. Heck my wife - been on two hunts with me - let me release a travelbug for our son on the day he was born! She's understanding, as long as it doesn't get in the way of practical concerns. Got a new baby boy and 12-16" of snow expected tonight, so I won't be out again for a while, but when I am, she's good with it.

 

--MGb

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Caching has been great for our marriage. We usually go together on weekends, but I have gone alone on a couple of business trips and hubby frequently goes on his own or with coworkers at lunch. It has helped us cope with the loss of our daughter and gives us something to look forward to on a regular basis.

 

However, I must say that every now and then on a hunt, we irritate each other greatly by arguing over coordinates/gloating over who gets to the cache first/disagreeing about what to take and leave.

 

All in all, it is a team effort. I usually do the lookups and downloads, and navigate the car to the parking area. Hubby is the front man with the GPSr and has an uncanny ability to find the cache. I do the logging once we get home, and we both track our watchlists and hides.

 

So far, no "dancing" while caching, but the future is wide open...

 

Thanks for an interesting topic!

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I ("Ha") was/is a lifelong geography and map nut, and a bit of an outdoor nut as well. But my wife ("Li"), probably has more outdoor experience than I (her brothers were Boy Scouts and her dad a scoutmaster.....she went camping a lot as a kid and I first did when I met her as an adult), though little geo/map interest.

 

Well, one of her brothers introduced us to caching! It turned out to be a great and inexpensive way to get exercise, enjoy the great outdoors and explore lots of nearby places we never knew of before!

 

I thought I was the more eager to cache, but when I saw an opportunity to do our first serious FTF attempt on an early Sunday morning (I'm a LOT more of a morning person than my wife), she was the one who got the kids dressed ASAP and pushed me to the car (we ended up being STF by just 30 minutes).

 

It has really gotten us more together and we often go back to the parks we've discovered. In fact, recently we have done "payback" and started doing hides in little-known parks we knew about that we wanted to introduce others too (and again, I thought I was more eager to do hides, but once I got one going, my wife started buying lock-n-locks and swag and proposed more; to the point that we're up to 6 hides and have 2 more planned by spring!

 

And right before the "username lockdown" in June, she came up with a brilliant username that reflects all of us by incorporating the first 2 letters of our first names.

 

Interesting topic, thanks for creating it!

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We started a couple of months ago. Hubby works days, I work non-traditional second shift (and go to college) at the same place. The only time we have together is the weekend. Once we started geocaching we started planning the weekends in advance, geocaching of course. Since we started, 208 finds/18 hides, we've become addicted. (Our neighbors, that just moved in from Oregon that also cache, think we need a 12-step program. HA!HA!)

 

I've started a TB in appreciation of my sister from Oregon who introduced us to geocaching. I've in turn gotten another sister started.

 

I spend at least an hour a day during the week and several hours on the weekend looking for new caches or areas to hit. We've done all the local caches within 30 miles and working on the rest within 50 miles.

 

We are having fun and enjoying the time that we are spending together. That's what marriage is all about. Right??

 

mrring

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mine isn't that interested in finding the caches. He'll happily go on walks with me and the kids. But the actual hunt is all mine. He'll help me if I get stuck cause I'm the one carrying the baby on my back.

 

Now, when it comes to placing the caches, and making and designing them, I can't get him to shut up. :laughing: and he's far more evil than I could ever be! he's read some of the - other - threads over my shoulder and he's just... evil I tell ya. Eeeeeeeeevil!

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I had to go to Hawaii to log a few caches this month. I could have easily made this a 2 1/2 day trip with minimum expense (free flights, one day's car rental and one night's hotel stay). But ohh no, my wife said 'you're not going to HI with out me'. So my $300 HI trip turned into a six day Hawaiian vacation on Oahu - Waikiki with an extra zero added to the expense.

 

Since we live on the East coast my body clock was all askew during the first few days in paradise. Not a problem. A little night urban caching is just what the body needs to adjust. :D So at 0200 Local I'm climing out of bed, four hours' rest. I snagged about six caches before I returned to the hotel to join my wife for breakfast at 0500. Why so early? So many caches ... so little time. Four of the six mornings there, we were up by 0415 to tackle the breakfast buffet at 0500 to be enroute to trail heads by 0530.

 

My wife was a real trooper. We spent most of the week hiking for caches. We sacraficed about half a day snorkling in Hanuba(?) Bay. That experience never compared to some of the awesome caches we/I found on the SE side of Oahu.

 

During the week we shared some beautiful sunrises and sunsets. We even did our first 'night cache' on Sacred Moonrise and The Case of The Twisted Kitty.

 

Although we had a wonderful (but tiring) week together, she's not checking Expedia.Com for packages to AK. Looks like I will be solo for that one in April. I wonder what she will say when I express the need for a few caches in Carribean. :D

 

As for neglect, yea sometimes she feels it but lets pick ... three to four hours a day on my bicycle (alone) or the same time spent caching toting her and the family along sharing in an outstanding activity.

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My wife and kids don't like it. I only cache once a week so there is no stress on the marriage. I have been trying to get my wife interested in it but not having much luck. I think I need to take her some very cool place and only stop for a few caches. I am planning trying to talk her into going out to the desert with me in a few weeks. I'm crossing my fingers! :D

Edited by TrailGators
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Wife sees that it helps me reduce stress so she lets me get out. Sometimes she and the 3 kids come with me and enjoy it very much. My little daughter is my eagle eye and spots the cache sometimes before I do! At least this hobby they enjoy it. My other two or three they would rather not deal with at all.

 

The wife even expects me to set up caches along our vacation route!

Edited by Whistlen
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I suggest to my husband we find a cache I get: "But you found one LAST week!!" (Harsh stare) ;) But he usually comes along anyway..

 

That sounds like the conversations at my house :laughing: *He* could easily go golfing twice a day every single day of the week, but when I suggest going caching more than once every few weeks I hear "but you JUST went". So I split my caching time between caching alone (which I try not to do, since it isn't the safest thing to do), taking my sister out caching with me, and taking my husband along. He likes to whine while we are out caching, but I think he doesn't really mind it all that much. It gets us out exercising and exploring new places, and it makes me happy. He isn't into bloodsucking insects too much, so it is much harder for me to get him out caching during the summer.

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I am glad that caching has helped so many marriages here. Not the case in mine. I already spend a ton of time away from home due to my duties as a teacher and high school wrestling coach which put a huge strain on an already volatile situation. I thought caching might help, but then remembered that anything I like she usually hates, especially if it has anything to do with the outdoors.

 

My daughter on the other hand loves going caching. She gets tired after awhile, but it gets her outside and a little dirty sometimes which is absolutely great since she is a bit of a princess and needs a little mud on her clothes once-in-awhile.

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For my wife, it's the act of the hunt that she likes. When I input the cache into my gps, she likes fguring out where it is physically, when it comes down to actually getting out of the car and looking for it here or there, she doesn't care for that part. She doesn't seem to mind that I go out with a friend so long as it's on a night that she's doing something withher girlfriend. I also get off work a bit earlier than she does, so I can go do a local one if I want before heading home. I try not to impact her in a negative way, but one some of my more recent cache hunts, she made it known that she doesn't want me to be late say picking her up from work.

 

Overall it's probably a neutral thing since caching so far has not done what my other hobby does, takes me away from home for days at a time, but then when I'll be away at the other events, you can bet that I'm going to work caching into my activities :P

 

Vince

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Well, I seem to be the odd man out here...

 

My wife hates my caching, and it causes a lot of problems for us.

 

She gets upset if I even bring it up, so I try not to talk about it. It kind of forces me to be a "closet cacher." (Grab a cache here and there while I am running errands!)

 

I don't understand that about women. Why do they hate our hobbies so much? Especially when I participate in hobbies that help me stay active and even moreso, she can participate in them as well. She is the one who taught me the basics of chess and the mere mention of chess brings scowl. I was introduced to Geocaching two weeks ago and I hunt the easier ones and even got her to go on one and still, it gets her riled at the mere mention. Why are women against men doing something besides staying at home doing absolutely nothing. ESPN and Golf channel are banned. It is a genetic predisposition that women want their men to be without fun or activity. Maybe I am wrong but I am starting to think this is true.

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My girlfriend pretty much hates it. She usually ends up going with me because she doesn't want to stay at home, but she pretty much complains the whole time. The only ones she remotely enjoys are the ones that are within mere steps of the parking place and take zero effort to find. It is very frustrating. My dog loves it though!

Leave her home.....lol

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Our marriage and communication getting better slowly. So far no problem, I started geocaching back November 2006. I talked to my wife about it and went out find few caches near by us. We did find all caches without problem. I let her find some with gps in her hand and she likes it. Same to my three year old daughter, she loves it more than us. Because of toys in the cache. Most time I save regular size caches for my family and I go out to find all micro or four stars cache by myself. Only time my wife does not like go out caching during winter. I got permission from her that I could go out find few in the snow and cold. I really glad gets into geocaching.

 

Happy caching

TeamHeusinkveld :)

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I have just started caching, and already I am thinking about caching 24-7. Every other word out of my mouth has been something on the lines of caching. I stay up late thinking of the next find, where it is, etc... I forgot to put my daughters socks on this morning because I was looking over a new GPS software. My husband thinks this is all funny, so he joined up just so we could spend more time together. I was wondering has caching caused problems in anyones marriage, or family?

 

We enjoy the "alone time" together...plus it's fun to be alone in secluded areas :D ...just the two of us. :D ..several times a day.... <_<:D

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My wife doesn't like geocaching very much. She doesn't even like me talking about it. So I go about once a week with my son who is pretty neutral about it so I try and schedule regular size caches for him. Otherwise I go during lunch at work and on business trips. When the wife and son are gone visiting her parents I make the most out of it.

So I don't think it affects the marriage much either positive or negative.

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Well, I seem to be the odd man out here...

 

My wife hates my caching, and it causes a lot of problems for us.

 

She gets upset if I even bring it up, so I try not to talk about it. It kind of forces me to be a "closet cacher." (Grab a cache here and there while I am running errands!)

 

I don't understand that about women. Why do they hate our hobbies so much? Especially when I participate in hobbies that help me stay active and even moreso, she can participate in them as well. She is the one who taught me the basics of chess and the mere mention of chess brings scowl. I was introduced to Geocaching two weeks ago and I hunt the easier ones and even got her to go on one and still, it gets her riled at the mere mention. Why are women against men doing something besides staying at home doing absolutely nothing. ESPN and Golf channel are banned. It is a genetic predisposition that women want their men to be without fun or activity. Maybe I am wrong but I am starting to think this is true.

 

Not all women are like that, just like not ALL men would rather sit home and watch sports on TV. Then again, there are women who would be ecstatic about getting an ammo can and a set of TB tags for their birthday, as I am. We're not married yet, but will be soon, and we're already planning to retire in a 4WD motorhome and cache across america while visiting all of the famous football and baseball stadiums! I think Geocaching has made us realize that we were meant for each other.

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Well, I seem to be the odd man out here...

 

My wife hates my caching, and it causes a lot of problems for us.

 

She gets upset if I even bring it up, so I try not to talk about it. It kind of forces me to be a "closet cacher." (Grab a cache here and there while I am running errands!)

 

I don't understand that about women. Why do they hate our hobbies so much? Especially when I participate in hobbies that help me stay active and even moreso, she can participate in them as well. She is the one who taught me the basics of chess and the mere mention of chess brings scowl. I was introduced to Geocaching two weeks ago and I hunt the easier ones and even got her to go on one and still, it gets her riled at the mere mention. Why are women against men doing something besides staying at home doing absolutely nothing. ESPN and Golf channel are banned. It is a genetic predisposition that women want their men to be without fun or activity. Maybe I am wrong but I am starting to think this is true.

 

I am the wife and the geocacher. My husband teaches soccer classes and camps, and I teach school for most of the year, so our work schedules only overlap a little and cover different times/days. I work five school days a week, he works after school, evenings when it is light out, and weekends a bunch. I would like for us to geocache together, but he isn't all that into it. He supports it to a point, but I think he doesn't like it all that much. I think HE is the one who has this idea that I should be home more when I am not working. Of course, we have kids . . . his daughter who is 17 this summer and our son who is almost three and a half. I have taken one or both kids with me, but they usually just limit our search parameters, and they get tired faster than I would. We are going on a little weekend getaway next weekend, and I have been permitted to scout out some caches in the area, so I am hoping that if we have fun doing those together as a family, it will motivate more such trips in the future . . . or at least more enthusiastic support for MY hobby when HE is working.

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Has anyone ever "done a lil dance" while out caching?

 

To answer the OP:

Disrupting? NO!! Not a chance. When hubby and I went to our Pastor after getting engaged, he had asked us what our common ground was. What was the safe place where we could come together when things were not going well. I think he expected an answer involving *begonias*. What he got was "playing". That's what we do that always brings us together. There have been several times when things were rough for us and going out to play together helped a great deal. Caching is just about the most playful you can get. We both get very excited about doing certain caches or about achieving specific milestones, and because we do this together, we talk to each other rather than one spouse detailing the events of the day while the other listens. We both get to participate and contribute.

On the other hand, I do wish we would talk, at least on occasion, about anything else but caching. It gets a bit predictable and old. But hey, at least we are still talking!

 

To answer the quote:

I just got back to Colorado from our 1000/100 Tour. Drumuda Triangle was our 1000th find, our 100th (MI) FTF, and the last county we needed to complete the state. All alone on an empty island in Lake Huron? Yeah, we did a little dance....

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My wife hates it. She went out with me ONE TIME and I think that's what scarred her for life. I kinda left out the part about walking alot, walking alot through woods with thorn bushes, bugs, and mud. I guess she's just a city girl at heart. She always complains every time I want to go. Going benchmark hunting gets an even worse reaction.

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We discovered caching together and cache together and we both love it!

 

It's kind of funny, I'm short and somewhat overweight, but the more challenging the trail, the more I'm into it! I don't like bushwhacking a while lot, but give me a rocky trail and I'm in heaven... it's something to do with pushing myself to the challenge. I may feel like my heart is going to burst out of my chest, but when that cache is located... man, what a rush!

 

He's better at bushwhacking and does pretty good finding caches. I keep the dog and 7 1/2 year old on their leash :D and help find too and I'm the "trip organizer"...

 

In any case, though, we love it and I don't see us quitting any time soon, although we might take a break when the dark, snowy winter gets here. In the middle of December we're lucky to get 5 or 6 hours of sunlight and night caching with little kids just doesn't sound like fun!

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