Rutson's Soliloquy

[+Alibags]

To the tune of 'In the bleak mid winter'

 

When out geocaching

Oh what did I see

From a hundred yards away

sticks under a tree

sticks were piled up sticks on sticks

on sticks on sticks

in the U. P. O. S.

hidden obviously

 

and....

 

Oh little town of Berkhamsted

How still we see thee lie

beneath thy deep TB-less sleep

some cachers passing by

yet in thy bushes glinting

a hint of tupperware

A hundred caches per sqaure mile

will be hid here by next year.

[Helen in Mustardland]

The Song of Geocacher (with apols to Longfellow)

 

You shall hear how Geocacher

Walked and hunted in the forest,

Not for nuts nor yet for berries,

Not for creatures now endangered,

Not for pathways through the woodland,

Or for game to eat for dinner

But for sites to hide his caches,

(Naturally he had permission.)

 

First he found a prime location,

Built a pile of sticks about it

In the roots of fallen oak tree,

In the blithe and pleasant spring-time,

with a mossy log he hid the

box that once held ammunition

And, by taking many readings

Set his Etrex to record it.

Home he went to write his cache page

(setting fiendish puzzle for it;

puzzle to outwit most cachers)

sent to Eckington to publish

 

Seeking finds then went our cacher

Through the leafy woods he wandered;

Following his Etrex arrow

though the signal it was patchy

Though the trees did cover greatly,

and did turn his arrow falsely.

Followed he the Etrex arrow

through the meadows thick with nettles,

crossed the stream, avoided puddles

looking out for likely places.

Not within the dry-stone walling

nor inside the rabbits' burrows,

(Lactodurum would not let a

cache be set against the guidelines)

 

Geocacher, seeking caches,

By the river's brink he wandered,

cursing Etrex arrow roundly

as it pointed 'cross the water

far across the raging water

and there were no nearby bridges;

So he tried at last to leap it

leapt across the raging torrent

(keeping tight hold of the Etrex

for he did not want to drop it)

oh so nearly did he make it

then his feet did slip beneath him

slip upon the bank so muddy

back into the river fell he

cursing loudly as he did so

as his feet and legs were sodden,

cursed the setter of the caches

who had set them up so cruelly!

 

Squelching on, our Geocacher

watched the distance fall to zero

looked about him, for the stick-o-

flage that on the cache was sitting.

looked for gerr and vil and such-like

for he knew the cachers' language

then he wished, did Geocacher

that he had the spoiler picture

many gerr and much vil was there

where the distance fell to zero.

 

Finally did Geocacher

find the gerr and see the treasure

swapped he swaps and took he T.Bs

that within the cache lay waiting

signed the log in exultation

signed it with a lordly flourish

then replaced it with great care, for

it must not be found by muggles

Then he looked down at his Etrex

at his little yellow Etrex

and he swore full long and mighty

for his car he had not waymarked.

[+walkergeoff and wife]

I have noticed that my 'edit' button is not visible in this thread - but it is visible in others. Does anyone else have this problem, or is this some fiendish scheme to prevent me from 'improving' my contributions?

[+rutson]

Edit button disappears after a certain ammount of time, I forget how long...

[+Lil Devil]

The Twelve Days of Cachemas

[Mittellegi]

Now is the discount of our winter tents...

[+doctor scotland]

she walks the woods in a black dress

and me, i dress up in black...and we listen to the sea...

and look at the gps in a poetic kind of way.

what you call it when you look at the gps in a poetic kind of way?

you know. when you grope for caches.

 

Subbacultcha - The Pixies

[+The Hokesters]

Edit button disappears after a certain ammount of time, I forget how long...

After the length of Helen's contribution I am sure all previous edit buttons have disappeared

[+Simply Paul]

War quotes:

 

Of geocoins being logged but not released at events: "I counted them all out, and I counted them all back."

 

Of our esteemed Reviewers: "Never in the muddy field of human caching was so much owed by so many to so few."

 

"I have in my hand a cache sheet" - What he doesn't know is someone's moved the cache...

 

In a nutshell: "Geocaching is Hell"

 

Stating the obvious: "The first casualty of forum arguments is truth"

 

Proving Hollywood makes war better than anyone else: "Cachers don't surf" or "I love the smell of tupperware in the morning. It's the smell of FTF."

[+walkergeoff and wife]

With apologies to Ole Blue Eyes:

 

Come cache with me, let’s cache, let’s fly away!

If you can use, some exotic views

There’s a cache in far Bombay

Come cache with me, we’ll fly we’ll fly away

 

Come cache with me, let’s float down to Peru

In lama land, there’s a cacher man

And he’ll set a cache for you.

Come cache with me, we’ll float down in the blue.

 

Once I get you out there, where men their caches hide

We’ll just glide, starry eyed.

Once I get you out there, an FTF will be so near

You may hear, Reviewers cheer - because we found it together.

 

Caching-wise it’s such a lovely day

You just say the words, and we’ll beat the Birders

Down to Acapulco Bay

It’s perfect, for a caching honeymoon - they say

Come cache with me, we’ll fly we’ll fly away!

Edited December 17, 2005 by walkergeoff

[+Learned Gerbil]

And now, the first find is near;

And so I face the final curtain.

My friend, I’ll say it clear,

I’ll state my case, of which I’m certain.

 

I’ve lived a life that’s full.

I’ve travelled each and ev’ry highway;

And more, much more than this,

I hid it my way.

 

Regrets, I’ve had a few;

But then again, too few to mention.

I did what I had to do

And saw it through without exemption.

 

I planned each offset leg;

Each careful step along the byway,

But more, much more than this,

I hid it my way.

 

Yes, there were times, I’m sure you knew

When I bit off more than I could chew.

But through it all, when there was doubt,

I ate it up and spit it out.

I faced it all and I stood tall;

And hid it my way.

 

I’ve loved, I’ve laughed and cried.

I’ve had my fill; my share of finding.

And now, as tears subside,

I find it all so amusing.

 

To think I did all that;

And may I say - not in a shy way,

No, oh no not me,

I hid it my way.

 

For what is a man, what has he got?

If not himself, then he has naught.

To hide the cache he truly owns;

And not just find the hides of those.

The record shows I took the blows -

And hid it my way!