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That Was Disgusting!


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Today Gerbil Queen and myself set out for some Surrey Caching. We did an easy one on the North Downs, then popped into the very busy Newlands Corner Car park for some refreshment before tackling a few more cahces. I ordered a Chicken Burger and a coffee. The Coffee was OK, but the thing that was served to me as a Chicken Burger defies meaningful discription. The bun was fine, the salad was fine, but the grey smelly slimy thing inside certainly had little to do with chicken. I took one bite - it was all I could manage - it tasted like the grey slime it looked like. The flavour and aroma reminded me of the grease that you have left in the tray after you have roasted a chicken - but a day or two later when it is cold andfd congealed. The whole thing went in the bin. It was definitly the most disgusting thing I have ever been served, including the dreadful 1960's school dinners I suffered. GQ's burger wasn't much better.

 

I didn't feel too well after this, so we never did the other caches we had planned.

 

Anyone got other places near clusters of caches that are definitly worth a miss?

Edited by Learned Gerbil
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Anyone got other places near clusters of caches that are definitly worth a miss?

On my recent, fairly well-publicised trip to dust off some of the more remote and inaccessible caches off the west coast of Ireland, I was foolish enough to stay at the luxurious Station House Hotel in Clifden. The room accommodation was fine, but the restaurant that evening was like a 30-year trip backwards in time...

 

The whole dinner menu was composed in a sort of corrupted Irfranglais, with even recognisable words mis-spelled. Some of the dishes on offer were so baffling that I was forced to consult the head waiter about them...

 

“... and is this really what it says?”

 

Grilled lambs' liver pate, with confitt of Sevile marmalade

 

“Yes Sir, grilled liver pate it is all right, very nice too Sir.”

 

Well, I'd never heard of anyone grilling pate before, so I had to order it, out of curiosity. Once served, it appeared that the Chef's idea had been: to cover slices of liver with pate, and toast the whole lot under a grill.

 

Those of you who can cook will realise at once what the outcome of this insane recipe would be.

 

Having sent back the plateful of raw sliced liver, surrounded by melted fat with bits of floating mince in it, I ordered the “Soup du Joure” instead. (Vegetable.) This was quite good – and would have been even better if it hadn't been stone cold.

 

At this point I ordered a second bottle of red wine, as it was becoming obvious that this was one of those meals which is best consumed while blind drunk.

 

The main course (selected as being eatable with one hand as my left arm was still in a sling) had been described on the menu as “Lentil curry”. In my innocence, I assumed that this would (i) have lentils in it, and (ii) be a curry.

 

No such luck.

 

I don't know what it was, and I hope never to find out.

 

The only things I do know are: it looked revolting, and smelled even worse than it looked. There was (of course) no question of eating it.

 

By this stage, remember, more than an hour had passed and my entire meal had been half a plate of cold soup and some bread. I finished the bottle of wine and staggered out into the streets of Clifden to search for some kind of sustenance.

 

There didn't seem to be anywhere serving food at that time of night, but there were plenty of pubs serving drink.

 

With peanuts.

 

It was a going to be a long night...

 

 

-Wlw.

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There must be something about Surrey - after narrowly escaping with my innocence intact at Ockham Common, I was probably too shocked at the time to mention in the write-up that I then had a truly shocking hamburger at the café in the car park.

 

On another tack, it sounds like WLW encountered a chef who had perhaps misheard a description of a truly magnificent dish (pan-fried foie gras) and tried to make it based solely on an incorrect description. It should be made with a slice of whole foie gras (about four times the price of fillet steak per kilo), not the greatly inferior "pâté de foie gras", which is then pan-fried for a couple of nanoseconds. You could perhaps grill it, but you'd have to use a blowtorch to get the temperature hot enough, quick enough. If you cook it for any length of time, it starts to melt, and you get WLW's "melted pâté on liver" effect.

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always take picnic, then can take as long as want hunting and stop when hungry. not either give up te search or go hungry. plus tend to have a 7 year old in tow. so a way to make her eat fairly well because we'd only end up in mcd's otherwise.

 

too many scare stories about what some sick individuals will do to food they are cooking.

 

just remember one thing, it's not theft or deception to not pay the full amount just what you think it's worth. they can then take you to court to try and recover the rest.

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too many scare stories about what some sick individuals will do to food they are cooking.

err, yes, I have read 'Trainspotting', which has a bit about this sort of thing in it.

 

Why don't we Brits like to complain? I certainly do if I get served up with a plate of inedible muck. More often than not the problem then gets sorted. Having been served up with a stone cold meal recently and complained, I got a replacement meal (not merely the original heated up) and I also did not have to pay for it and we got a round of free drinks. There is certainly no need to be rude or shouty, but merely to bothered to firmly and politely state your case.

 

Mind you, it doesn't always work. On being asked "is everything alright for you" at another establishment, I then replied in the negative (as the meal was dreadful) and was told "Well I ate that dish myself at lunchtime, and it was perfectly okay". So why bother to ask, I wonder? Mind you, if the waitress has already eaten it, that could explain things...

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so it's been hanging around since lunchtime? that's meant to be a recommendation is it? could i have something made fresh please. :D

 

just a little paranoid of extra special sauce being added if the food goes back to the kitchen! not that i'd eat anything that i din't like just because...

 

one slight advantage with the likes of mcd's you can see it being prpeared and it's freshly made.

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Quite near to Skirrid Fawr (which I didn't get to attempt due to bad weather, you'll find the Skirrid Mountain Inn.

 

Reputedly the oldest pub in Wales is not bad for starters. Lots of Ghosts? Public Executions?

Surely a must.

 

It's an example of a pub resting on it's laurels. The menu on the website is no longer accurate, and I paid £8 for a Ploughman's Sandwich (perhaps expecting it might feed two?) which was worth £3.50 at best. It's not the cleanest either and the beer (£2.40 for Cask Ale) isn't exactly cheap either.

 

Give it a miss.

 

However, the farmer with the stall on the other side of the road, should he still be there, sells cheap and tasty duck eggs.

 

I'll leave you with a recommendation for those of you heading down south on the M5. A stone's throw from Jct.19 (Portishead) you'll find the tiny village of Portbury, and a pub called The Priory. It serves excellent and reasonable food. The A369 will take you close to many caches in Clifton, Ashton Court and Leigh Woods, and there's two caches in Portishead.

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